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Home / New Zealand

<i>Sideswipe:</i> Thursday

Ana Samways
By Ana Samways
Sideswipe - ana.samways@nzherald.co.nz·
7 Mar, 2007 04:00 PM3 mins to read

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Someone with a sense of humour disobeys the instructions to the letter in Ward Lane, Hamilton.

Someone with a sense of humour disobeys the instructions to the letter in Ward Lane, Hamilton.

Ana Samways
Opinion by Ana SamwaysLearn more

KEY POINTS:

A reader from Manukau was at a petrol station filling up his BMW, wearing black dress pants, pale blue shirt, black tie and a black, fleecy waistcoat with grey trim. "A middle-aged man slips in alongside me in his Jag and says, 'Fill'er up, mate - premium'. I told him I didn't work there and hurried off. The next day, at Foodtown after work, I'm standing in front of the sauce aisle frantically looking for something, working the shelf like a jigsaw, when another shopper taps me on my shoulder and asks me where the flour is kept. Again, I told her I didn't work there and hurried off. I'm wearing a dark navy blue shirt with a cream polka-dot tie. A week later, I'm at the toy aisle in The Warehouse, looking for a present for a 5-year-old. A mother of two asks me, 'Will you be restocking those again soon?' I'm wearing a crisp, white, short-sleeved shirt and blue tie this time, and the uniforms here are red. As a Pacific Islander in a management role with an $850k house, beach house and married to a lovely European Kiwi, with two beautiful Samoan/European daughters ... I finally worked out what the issue was ... never wear a tie to work."

* * *

Michele Boston writes: "I have a Telecom phone and my husband a Vodafone. In the past texting between them was pretty much immediate, but now it can be fast or painfully slow, taking hours (the record so far is eight hours). Before we worked out we were on competing mobile networks, the poor man was constantly in the dogbox for not getting back to me quick enough."

* * *

Yesterday Sideswipe reported that one of the new lecture theatres at Auckland University's Business School had been named the Fisher & Paykel Appliances Auditorium. Another student says "the air conditioning is on from before the 8 o'clock morning lecture, and all the way through the day. Some students have started calling it 'the Fridge"'.

* * *

The picture of the 11 road workers standing around was a cheap shot, but was more a dig at Auckland's roading woes. One reader says: "Sometimes activity B can't start until activity A is finished ... It's also harder to take a picture of 11 guys sitting on the dole." And Peter Malcouronne hopes "in the interests of balance, you'll take a similar photo down at the Viaduct around the corporate lunch 'hour' (11am-3pm) and watch as our captains of industry (on 10, 20 times the earnings of your average manual labourer) 'network' and contribute mightily to the nation's productivity".

Each day Sideswipe will link to a humorous, satirical or simply strange video clip selected from the infinite amount of nothingness hosted on YouTube and the like. The very best online videos will be carefully chosen and hosted on Ana's online magazine Spare Room and shared with Sideswipe readers. Today's Video Webpick: A montage of people injuring themselves, either willful stupidity or bad luck. Look out for the small woman walking the Great Dane and the cat attacking a ceiling fan. And let’s be careful out there. Watch it here
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