KEY POINTS:
If Ali G did the Nativity: Some parents are furious that students at Oakwood School in Bexley, England, were given a script for a nativity play in which Jesus turns water into strong lager, Mary and Joseph break into a garage because there is no room at the
inn and the three wise men bear gifts of adidas and Burberry clothes. Bexley council said the play was part of a drama lesson about the use of language and was not intended as a nativity play, which would be a traditional Christmas story. The play went like this: "There's this bird called Mary, yeah? She's a virgin. She's not married or nuffink. But she's got this boyfriend Joe, innit? He does joinery an' that. Mary lives with him in a crib down Nazaref. She's like, 'Ooo ya looking at [to Gabriel]? You got one up the duff, you have'. She gives it to him large. 'Stop dissin' me yeah? I ain't no Kappa slapper. I never bin wiv no ... !"
(Source: Telegraph.co.uk)
* * *
Yahoo isn't "firing" staff - it's "getting fit". That euphemism, the genius of some overpaid consultant, according to Vallywag.com, must've stuck in the craw of the 1500 people made redundant this week ... As would the leaked memo the website got its hands on which detailed how management should go about sacking the employees. The list of don'ts included: Don't engage in small talk about personal matters; get directly to the point; don't attempt to answer the "why me?"; don't own the employee's feelings; don't say that you disagree with the decision. (Source: Valleywag.com)
* * *
A passionate kiss ruptured a young woman's eardrum in China in what has been dubbed the "kiss of deaf". The woman from Zhuhai in Guangdong province was treated by doctors after losing the hearing in her left ear, the China Daily reported. "The kiss reduced the pressure in the mouth, pulled the eardrum out and caused the breakdown of the ear," the doctor said. The woman's hearing would likely recover in about two months.
* * *
Quotable: This black humour in the Sydney Morning Herald amused Murray Hunter. "What's the definition of optimism in the finance sector? Answer: Ironing five shirts on a Sunday night." Christina noted a car number plate owned by a midwife which said "Bundun". And Lynton liked Radio New Zealand's business news explaining that "the slowdown is gathering speed".