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Home / New Zealand

<i>Sideswipe:</i> An arresting spectacle

Ana Samways
By Ana Samways
Sideswipe - ana.samways@nzherald.co.nz·NZ Herald·
27 May, 2009 04:00 PM3 mins to read

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An oxymoronic dish in Melbourne.

An oxymoronic dish in Melbourne.

Ana Samways
Opinion by Ana SamwaysLearn more

Two hundred prisoners will cycle around France next month, watched by scores of guards on bicycles, in the first incarcerated version of the Tour de France. Breakaway sprints will not be allowed.

"It's a kind of escape for us, a chance to break away from the daily reality of prison,"
said Daniel, a 48-year-old prisoner in Nantes. The prisoners' Tour de France will take them 2300km around the country, starting in Lille and stopping in 17 towns, each of which has a prison. However, participants will sleep in hotels. The ride will finish in Paris as is the tradition. (Source: Reuters)

* * *

A reader wonders:

"Has the recession hit the programme advertising at TVNZ? Is our state-owned telly channel on a letter count budget? Can't they afford to buy a vowel or write in full? Then why the ridiculous butchering of the English language with txt speak ... [Monday has become Mon, Tonight has become Ton, Later has become Ltr and Next is now Nxt.] Gt it tgther TVNZ."

* * *

Airport security FAIL:

"Leaving Vancouver Airport, something set off the metal detector, and having boots on they immediately waved the wand over them. The wand beeps. Off come the boots which are wanded, but no beep. The security lady proceeds to wand over my socks, which again sets off the wand. Off come the socks. She again waves the wand over my bare feet and again the wand goes off. At this point she realised that it was her own steel-capped shoes setting off the wand."

* * *
Bat wings, cankles, muffin top, turkey neck and cottage cheese thighs are all terms used to help women batter their own self esteem, but here's a new one ... Carb Face, which means a face that is "unpleasantly big"; looks like "a mass of dough", and comes from gym bunnies in LA. Please make it stop.

* * *

Kate Kemble enjoyed some delicious roasted almonds at a friend's house and was told they were purchased from a stall outside St Lukes. "I hurried to buy some myself and told the young guy who was selling them: "I've been hearing great things about your nuts." Long pause. Hurried transaction without eye contact.

* * *

School Rulz Suck:

1) A high school in Pennsylvania expelled a 15-year-old girl after security guards found an eyebrow trimmer in her purse. School officials say she violated the state's zero tolerance law banning weapons at school.

2) Another teenager in Utah wore a kilt to school as part of an art project, but the principal said some people might think he was cross-dressing, so he told him to change his clothes.
(Source: Reason.com)

* * *

View today's Herald cartoon

* * *

Today's Webpick: This epic battle between good and evil is a bit over the top for a shampoo ad. Watch it here.

Follow Ana Samways on Twitter here.

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