Eric Thompson: It's pretty simple staying safe

Too many accidents happen over Christmas. Photo / Simon Baker

Well folks, we're heading into the Christmas holiday period and without a shadow of a doubt I can guarantee there'll be carnage aplenty on our roads.

Of course I would like to wake up in a month or two and discover there hasn't been a single accident, let alone a road fatality. But that's not going to happen, as, unfortunately, there will always be road deaths. It's just the nature of the beast. If you put humans in charge of a tonne of killing machine someone's going to get hurt.

We will never eradicate road deaths, but if we all take collective responsibility, I'm sure we can reduce the road toll.

There will always be a certain percentage of drivers and riders out on the roads that let the red mist descend and the berserker rage take over.

But it's really quite simple - if things aren't going your way on a public road, you can't force it to bend to your will. In the words of my daughter, you've got to chillax and go with the flow. If the flow ain't going, you can't make it, because if you try it'll inevitable end in tears with someone wrapped around a tree or looking for a place to have an accident.

I'm not going to bang on again about how bad New Zealand drivers are, so instead of having a rant I'm going to make some constructive suggestions.

May I suggest you cut out the following, glue it to your dashboard and before you do anything stupid have a quick read. Not while you're driving, fool, get the passenger to read it out to you.

* If you think you may have had a beer or two too many, don't drive - kip under a tree or in the party host's garage.

* The road is not a racetrack and there's a speed limit for a reason. It's because you people aren't good enough to be race car drivers. You can hardly handle a car at 80km/h let alone 160km/h.

* The purpose of lanes on a motorway are so cars can pass each other safely. They are not there for you to be judge and jury and impose your own idea on how fast people are allowed to go. That's the police's prerogative - so move over.

* When you're on a single carriageway, the sign that says "passing lane 2 kilometres" does not mean get ready to speed up so no one can pass you. And, the symbol at the end of the passing lane doesn't mean slow down from 110km/h to the previous 70km/h you were doing. If you can do 110 on a passing lane why can't you do 110 on a single lane?

* If you really want to read the magazine on the back shelf of the car in front, ask the person to pull over so you can borrow it. Do not tailgate and then cry when you rear-end the car in front because you haven't left enough room.

* If you're a truck driver, towing a caravan or boat, or just out for an amble, check your mirrors. I swear you lot have some sort of secret society where you compare notes on how many cars you can hold up.

* One for the truck drivers. If you have envy issues with another truck driver save it for the truck stop. You have no idea how irritating it is to sit behind two trucks having a contest up a hill side-by-side holding up the rest of us and then not even being able to pass each other.

* Going on a Sunday drive is fine on any other day other than a Sunday when a lot of folk are trying to get back home after being on holiday.

* And finally - please remember the road is not yours and yours alone. Show some respect and exhibit a bit of patience. The place you're driving to isn't going anywhere. It'll still be there even if you're a day late, or God forbid, dead.