Claire Trevett: Jeers amid the Christmas cheer

Tony Ryall. Photo / Supplied.

It was Health Minister Tony Ryall who set the mood of Christmas for the last day of Parliament for the year. He stood, a beacon of festivity, in a white tie with red spots atop a garish green and white shirt.

There was a holler of awe from Labour, shouts of "get your pyjamas off" and calls for tinsel to complete the look as the member beamed at the effect he'd had.

But Mr Ryall was not the only thing resembling a Christmas present yesterday. David Parker handed what looked like a Christmas present to Gerry Brownlee, by asking how many Cabinet papers Mr Brownlee had submitted.

Proud of his work record, Mr Brownlee teased open the wrapping paper with a bit of gloating only to discover a trap lay within.

Mr Parker followed it up by asking about closing the wage gap with Australia - something Mr Brownlee had earlier in the year rashly declared was happening only to find out very quickly it wasn't. He nonetheless continued to try to claim it was, if you divided his statistics by pi and then squinted hard and turned your head 60 degrees.

When Mr Parker yesterday produced updated evidence showing it still wasn't happening, Mr Brownlee found himself up the creek without his preferred statistics, able only to bleat that the Government was too busy to "sit around twiddling its thumbs and reading reports from other countries".

He made a good fist of getting his own back in the adjournment debate later in the day. He began sombrely enough, reflecting on the year just gone and the pain wrought by the Pike River mine disaster and Christchurch earthquake.

Apologising for descending to the trivial, he announced there had been another disaster that year: the Labour Party.

Inspired by another theme of the year - The Hobbit - he suggested Labour MPs reconnect with their creative sides over summer by indulging in some film-making.

For Pete Hodgson - who spent the last few weeks on forensic analysis of Pansy Wong's travel itineraries - he suggested CSI: Dunedin. Labour leader Phil Goff was the perfect leading man for a remake of Cold Case.

"Then there is his nemesis, David Cunliffe or Caygill depending what day it is. [He] would be perfect for a starring role in The Meatless, although I understand he is also considering a part in Two and a Half Men."

For Shane Jones, whose year was plagued by revelations of his porn watching, Mr Brownlee proposed a new feature film: A Mighty Totara Rises Again.

"This of course would be a sequel to his well known classic A Hung Parliament."

Labour leader Phil Goff retorted by noting the Rubenesque Mr Brownlee himself had aptly already previously named Free Willy as a movie of his own making. Alas, when he tried to add Whale Rider to the list, National's Simon Power suggested that was already reserved by Mr Jones.

Instead, Mr Goff swept into a defence of the poor and an attack on the Government's tax "swindle", pausing only to give Mr Brownlee credit for his handling of the crises that marked the year.

By now Mr Ryall was long gone. But National whip Chris Tremain stood to say National had enjoyed another present Labour had left under their tree during the year. He anointed the troublesome expelled Labour MP Chris Carter as National's choice of Opposition politician of the year: "He's been the gift that just keeps giving".