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Home / New Zealand

<i>Catching up with:</i> Grahame Thorne, father of paralysed rugby player David

By Jarrod Booker
27 Dec, 2006 04:00 PM4 mins to read

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Grahame Thorne says David has improved a lot since May. Photo / John Mccombe

Grahame Thorne says David has improved a lot since May. Photo / John Mccombe

KEY POINTS:

Former All Black Grahame Thorne will look back on 2006 as his family's "annus horribilis".

But he figures that as his son, David, 21, slowly recovers from a stroke suffered after an injury on the rugby field in May, things can only get better.

"Some of those weeks
we had in May were probably the worst weeks of my life," Mr Thorne says.

"It puts a lot of stress on your marriage and the relationships between the family. Then again, you find out who your friends are."

David was playing in a club rugby match in Motueka and is thought to have suffered damage to his carotid artery when he was tackled hard. After the match, feeling unwell, he suffered the stroke while waiting to be seen by doctors.

An independent report by Nelson lawyer Garry Barkle into events leading to the stroke found that although the tackle was to blame, it was not malicious or intended to cause injury.

The stroke left David partially paralysed and unable to speak.

"Compared with May, David is in amazing shape [now]," Mr Thorne says.

"Although he can carry on a conversation to a certain extent, he can't put a sentence together."

His vocabulary is limited to a yes, no, a grunt or the odd profanity.

"He gets so frustrated when he can't tell you what he wants. What the doctors say is his head is like a washing machine. You've got to shout and he hears you."

David can now walk with a limp but the use of his right hand is "still not 100 per cent".

The family have moved from Nelson to Christchurch as the city offers better access to therapy and rehabilitation services.

They recently rented a Christchurch home and had to "beg, steal or borrow" to furnish it.

The financial toll on the family, with their lives revolving around David's situation, has been heavy. Mr Thorne and his wife, Briony, are not working, although he is still performing his duties as a Nelson city councillor.

"If it wasn't for the [New Zealand] Rugby Foundation, I don't know what we would do. [Executive officer] Rocky Patterson has been a tower of strength."

A celebrity auction raised $122,000 for a trust to help David, and friends had helped out, "but after a while people have to go on with their lives".

Mr Thorne says his other children - Gareth, Hannah and Hamish - have been amazing in their support of their injured brother.

David's daily routine usually involves about 12 hours of sleep, rising about 11am or midday and, if not in therapy, watching television, walking the dog or hitting a few golf balls.

"We are trying to get him involved with dog-trialling because he loves animals," Mr Thorne says.

Playing high-impact sport again is out of the question for David.

"I cry when I think of the waste of talent. God just came along and whacked him," Mr Thorne says.

David spends some time with friends and goes to the occasional 21st birthday party, but his lack of speech means "he can't have social intercourse. People can't be bothered talking to you if you can't reply back".

"His marbles are still there but at times he is away with the fairies."

The future for David is not clear. The pessimistic view is that the damaged artery could result in another stroke.

But his family are determined he will improve to the point where he will be able to live on his own.

"It's just slow, slow, slow," Mr Thorne says. "Any progress is good progress. We have made a pact and we are going to hang in there."

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