Brian Rudman: Everyone's an expert when it comes to designing stadiums

In simpler times, it was every boy's dream to be a train driver or an All Black. But we all seem to have grown up wanting to design a national stadium instead.

Ever since Sports Minister Trevor Mallard let it slip he was considering alternatives to Eden Park as the site of the 2011 World Rugby Cup final, everyone's become a stadium expert. Me included.

No piece of open space - either available or not - has been safe. Mr Mallard and his Wellington experts first fell for the finger wharves at the foot of Queen St but have since baulked at the cost and moved on to lust at the wide open spaces of Ports of Auckland's container terminal.

While the Government team were lurking at that end of the CBD, others were proposing non-vacant spaces like the Wynyard Wharf Tank Farm and inner-city Victoria Park. Forgetting, as far as the latter was concerned, that stadium building on that precious spot would not only enrage the locals but would rather interfere with Transit New Zealand's plans to dig under it to construct a vital tunnel connecting the harbour bridge to State Highway 1.

Last week brought two more brain waves. Te Papa architect Pete Bossley's proposal is for a Dr Who-type space ship, settled on the Manukau Harbour mud flats just offshore from the old Pikes Point rubbish tip. Two wide causeways carry fans from the shore to the circular pleasuredome - one for home supporters, I presume, the other for the "away" team.

Like the plans for the CBD wharf proposals, it was hard to get past wondering how many drunks would stumble over the sides and have to be fished from the shallows after each game.

Mr Bossley said his stadium would kick-start the regeneration of this depressed part of the waterfront. Which it might well do. But proposing a Manukau Harbour site rather misses the Government's obsession with finding a Waitemata Harbour site, close to the throbbing nightlife of downtown Auckland.

The only buzz around the Pikes Point site will be from mosquitoes and midges.

Closer to the CBD waterfront prescription is Auckland city councillor Richard Simpson's proposal to use the old Carlaw Park site, along with a bit of land appropriated from neighbouring Auckland Domain. Ever creative, Mr Simpson proposes opening up old tunnels beneath Albert Park and running a travelator from the central city down to the stadium. In its favour, the site is certainly adjacent to motorways and rail lines.

The big drawback is that the park owners, Auckland Rugby League, have already done a joint venture deal with Willis Bond and Co, to redevelop the site for commercial and residential use.

No doubt every commercial deal can be renegotiated. But it's difficult to imagine the Government has the money or time to navigate around such an obstacle.

Despite a plethora of proposals, the Ministry of Economic Development boffins remain focused on the Bledisloe Wharf end of the container terminal complex. They're so keen, they've reportedly retained the Wellington cake-tin stadium designers, Warren and Mahoney, to do modelling work.

Not that this means Bledisloe is a done deal. There's the obvious problem of whether a stadium of this size can be designed and built in time for this site.

There's also the rather important question of what impact appropriating this portion of wharf will have on the profitability of the country's biggest port. Not wanting to upset central politicians who could be bearing gifts, Auckland politicians and port officials are being politely co-operative. But, eventually, someone's going to have to make the call over whether there is space to share.

Then there's a grumpy Eden Park Trust Board who will end up with a white elephant on their hands if a waterfront stadium is chosen.

As for who's to pay for it, the talk is of special empowering legislation, both to circumvent any Resource Management Act hold-ups in the planning and building stages but also to provide new mechanisms for funding, such as hotel bed taxes and/or a possible local sales tax.

One fears that even though the Government and the rugby union organised this particular party, and invited the rugby world to come, it will be Aucklanders who are being lined up to pay for the balloons and venue. Just how much the bill will be, to say nothing of the venue, Aucklanders look like being the last to know.