How to overcome hurdles with flying colours – and dread: Wyn Drabble

Impressions of the hospital department, both the environment and the staff, are overwhelmingly positive, writes Wyn Drabble. Photo / Glenn Taylor

Wyn Drabble is a teacher of English, writer, public speaker and musician. He is based in Hawke’s Bay.

OPINION

Sometimes we can really surprise ourselves with what we are able to achieve. Take a cluster of clichés – do the hard yards, step outside your comfort zone – and you might find that your actions can provide positive proof of the combined truth of these.

I, for example, have just achieved something I never imagined I could, fasting for three days (or two and a half might be closer to the truth). Of course, I did not do this by choice; it was a requirement for a medical procedure.

When I heard the requirement, my natural response was: “You want me to what?”

The hospital very kindly sent me a clearly laid-out plan to follow and I responded, “Me! Do that!”

Please allow me to share (my version of) the advice with you.

Day Three (two days before the procedure)

Today you must eat only low-residue foods. If you don’t know what low-residue foods are, we have provided a handy box into which you can write all your favourite foods and drinks. (I write in the box.)

Thank you. The bad news is that not one of those foods you have written is considered low-residue so you must not eat any of those on Day Three. If you try to cheat, your surgeon will notice early on in your procedure and will down tools and postpone your treatment. This would mean going through the fasting period again!

The good news is that you can eat any of the low-residue foods listed in the box below. And in any quantity. In the box below, write all the foods you don’t like, or even hate.

You’re doing great! You are now ready for...

Day Two (the day before the procedure)

The bad news is that you can’t eat anything today. The good news is that you can drink any clear fluid, i.e. fluid you can see through. I ran a check on my beer but couldn’t really see through it so that was out. I didn’t have a show of seeing through my red wine either so that was also a goner. You could see blurrily through white wine but only if you squinted a bit so, alas, that needed to be binned too.

We hope you enjoyed Day Two. Now it’s time for...

Day One (the day of the procedure)

No food again. It’s another clear fluids day (though it would be worth checking the beer and wine again for transparency as you may have got a false reading on Day Two).

Anyway, it’s all over now and my impressions of the hospital department, both the environment and the staff, were overwhelmingly positive. The first nurse who welcomed me and led me through to the holding area could not have been more suited to her job of welcoming people and making them feel at ease. And I told her so.

Then all the others were friendly and professional too and the post-procedure sandwiches – my first food for days – were as good as you can get. That’s the power of abstinence at work.

I had done the hard yards and stepped outside my comfort zone and, looking back on the events, it wasn’t that difficult.

It exemplified a little belief I often cling to, that if you dread something enough before the event, it will turn out to be not so bad after all. As long as the dread is genuine – my method won’t work if you fake it – you should make it, to borrow more clichés, over your hurdle with flying colours.

If you’ll excuse me now, I think it’s time for me to celebrate with a drink I can’t see through.