Guile, not looks, wins day

Chad Tuoro had it won even before his shirt came off, having bribed his vocal supporters. Picture / Alan Gibson

Counting the abdominal muscles was a pointless exercise in preparing for yesterday's Mr Mt Maunganui contest, where strategy and networking were more important than good looks.

In a system worthy of the Ukraine election, the more people a contestant could bribe, blackmail or woo into cheering for them, the better their chance of success.

Nineteen-year-old Grant Pieterse had the body, and the smile, earning him a gasping blonde admirer in the front row.

But his pitifully small following was no match for that of the debonair Chad Tuoro, 23, who had the charm, the noise and quite a few tricks hidden up his boardshorts to pull off the title.

Chad was staying in the local campground and later admitted to some perfidy in his preparation.

"I promised these kids if they cheered for me I'd buy something for them." The kids obliged, chanting "Chad, Chad, Chad" every time he moved, with nearly all the camp's inhabitants also in support.

To make up, he promised to donate some of the $500 winner's purse to tsunami relief.

Although he was the clear winner, he faced strong competition.

The shameless Tanner Hill set the stakes high by his Captain Planet hurdling of the barrier around the catwalk in the initial round.

The finesse of his Michael Jackson dance netted him a few extra fans.

After performing, the Chicago man, now living in Auckland, was confident he was in with a chance.

"I brought three or four friends, so hopefully that's enough, but Chad looks like he's got half the crowd."

He hoped being a foreigner wouldn't "put a dampener on things".

However, Chad could do no wrong. From the moment he listed one of his occupations as "bird watcher for the SPCA" and said Helen Clark would be his dream date, the crowd was hooked. A lesser man might have fallen when asked what he would cook a special woman for dinner, but Chad took a risk and won.

"Because of my Maori heritage, I'd do a bit of a hangi in the backyard. I'd teach the young woman how to do that, and watch her dig."

He clinched the deal by roping in his friend Jason Woodyard to play the bagpipes for his final parade, stripped to his boxers.

Others were not so convincing.

Bricklayer Brent Wilson might have been dubbed "the best layer in the Bay" by his friend Wade, but he wore gallumphing grey sneakers and black ankle socks at the end of his otherwise tanned form.

Guy Hume's desperate last minute attempt to get votes by stripping to his underwear and spanking himself gained him second place, and third was Hill, who won the prize he coveted of a skydiving trip.