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Home / New Zealand

<EM>Sideswipe</EM>

Ana Samways
By Ana Samways, by Ana Samways
Sideswipe - ana.samways@nzherald.co.nz·
9 Feb, 2005 09:21 PM3 mins to read

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Mapped out: 100% pure NZ rubbish

Mapped out: 100% pure NZ rubbish

Ana Samways
Opinion by Ana SamwaysLearn more

Peter found this geographically inspired piece of rubbish on the footpath in fashionable Kingsland. "The tragedy is if it had been shaped like the US instead of New Zealand I would probably make thousands of dollars selling it on ebay. Oh well, I'll keep looking", he says.

* * *


Winners of the wackiest warning label of the year, courtesy of a court watchdog organisation in the US called Michigan Lawsuit Abuse Watch.


1st prize:
"Do not use for personal hygiene" ... on a toilet brush.


2nd prize:
"This product moves when used" ... from a child's scooter.


Previous winners have included:
"Remove child before folding" ... on a baby buggy.
"Once used rectally, the thermometer should not be used orally" ... on a digital thermometer.
"Never remove food or other items from the blades while the product is operating" ... on an electric hand blender.
"Harmful if swallowed" ... on a three-pronged brass fishing lure.
"Do not use this product as a toy, pillow, or flotation device" on a bag of air used as a packing material.
"Do not use as a ladder" ... on a 30cm tall CD rack.
"Never iron clothes while they are being worn" ... on a household iron.
"Do not use the Silence Feature in emergency situations. It will not extinguish a fire" ... on a smoke detector.
"Do not eat toner" ... on a laser printer cartridge.
And on a pair of cyclist's shin guards ... "Shin pads cannot protect any part of the body they do not cover".
(Source: New Scientist)

* * *

A reader writes: "Driving down the Southern Motorway on Sunday just before the Ramarama offramp at around 2.20pm, I saw a Blue Nissan Sunny swerving across the road in front of me. I didn't want to get too close to this vehicle so I moved into the centre lane and passed it. Looking across, I see a person dressed in a black gown and dog collar with the Bible open, leaning against the steering wheel reading. Obviously he had the man above on his shoulder or he had the Bible opened at the appropriate page should an accident or fatality have occurred."

* * *

Mary Nuttall of Mt Eden has some advice for parents wanting to set up bank accounts for their children: "My son (now 16) opened an ASB Bank account 10 years ago as part of the now-defunct school savings scheme. When the school scheme was discontinued, ASB gave my son a regular savings account with all fees remitted. This will continue until he turns 18. Alex gets a printed statement once a quarter and for the last few years (with our permission) has had an eftpos card. All free of charge. Plus he gets a little interest on his savings. I imagine ASB is not the only bank offering this service."

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