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Home / New Zealand

Dominic George: What you heard not what I said

By Dominic George
NZME. regionals·
12 Oct, 2014 08:00 PM5 mins to read

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Netball isn't just for girls, but it's appallingly frustrating to watch. Photo / Greg Bowker
Netball isn't just for girls, but it's appallingly frustrating to watch. Photo / Greg Bowker

Netball isn't just for girls, but it's appallingly frustrating to watch. Photo / Greg Bowker

Perception is an odd beast.

It is naturally the truest thing we know as it's our own experience and yet at the same time peculiar to those around us who perceive things differently.

The saying, "You hear what you want to hear", is very much linked to that, and it's understandable. If I were to list the things I've been called throughout my brief existence to date there would be no room for anything else to write. Most of them are tongue-in-cheek, some derogatory, the odd one complimentary and a small number genuinely praiseworthy.

But I've never been called a redneck -- until now. In fact, regular listeners of the Farming Show will know Jamie Mackay regularly refers to me as a communist. He never lets truth get in the way of a good story ...

Nevertheless, there's a first time for everything. I refer to an email from a listener who took umbrage at last Friday's Farming Show, in particular the segment with Jeremy Rookes and Jason Uden, otherwise known as the Two Farmers Js, and their Friday Face-Off.

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The writer was with his gay son when he heard Rookes volunteer the alarming information he partakes in a local netball competition. Exactly. What ensued was a merciless ribbing of the hapless Rookes from Uden and I, which he thoroughly deserved.

However, the writer says he was "appalled at the homophobic attitude directed at Jeremy for playing a game of netball". He continues, "My son found the comments offensive, derogatory and downright redneck ... He said to me that rugby was actually gayer than netball." The writer concludes, "How about a little bit more understanding of how other people live their lives."

There was plenty more, but all in all it was a fair and reasoned complaint and I could understand where he was coming from. The problem is, I'm not sure he heard it the same way others did.

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I replied thus:

"Mr ... , thank you very much indeed for your feedback regarding Friday's Farming Show. Jamie Mackay has passed on your comments to me as he is currently out of the country under the guise of 'work'. I've taken the liberty of re-listening to the audio in question on two occasions and must say I disagree with your assertion that the attitude of Jason and I to Jeremy's netball playing was homophobic. At least mine certainly was not.

"On the show, Jeremy takes a figurative walk into the lion's den by proclaiming life is so good as a sheep and beef farmer he has copious amounts of spare time to indulge in such pastimes as recreational sport, one of those being mixed twilight netball. Jason and I are instantly bemused and befuddled at his choice of sport, given it's traditionally a female activity, albeit not exclusively.

"Jeremy then rubs salt into his self-inflicted wound by divulging the fact that, as part of the competition-winning side, he partook in the consumption of a drink he refers to as 'passion pop'. I wonder aloud, tongue firmly in cheek, whether or not I'm talking to a male or a female? He assures us all he is indeed a male.

"On reflection, our taking the mickey out of Jeremy for playing netball was exactly that -- for playing netball and really had nothing to do with his sexuality. I find netball an appallingly frustrating game to watch and tend to avoid it like the plague.

"Incidentally, I wonder if that saying will change given the frightening mortality rate resulting from the recent Ebola outbreak? I digress.

"At one point Jason does begin to take things a tad too far in my opinion and I pull him up on it immediately.

"I do genuinely apologise if your son was offended by the comments made, that was not our intention. Tell him I once had a science teacher at school who took great delight at winding up the rugby players by proclaiming the sport was invented by homosexuals to vent their frustrations. Does it really matter if rugby is more gay than netball? Again, the 'ribbing' for Jeremy was in relation to the sport, not his sexual preferences.

"As to your final point, I can only understand how I live my life, but as a proud father of three boys myself I can understand why you felt compelled to write and express your disappointment in the segment.

"I assure you I have no prejudice against race, colour, creed or sexuality -- each to their own, except for referees, traffic wardens and television programmers. They are despicable.

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"Once again, thanks for the correspondence and I wish you and your son all the very best."

Perception. You see, in my mind netball and "passion pop" are the culprits here, certainly not homosexuals. More feedback welcome -- it's good for columns.

• Dominic George hosts Farming First, 5am-6am weekdays on Radio Sport.

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