Forget saying it with flowers: the United Nations has said it with toilet paper for the 160 leaders at the UN General Assembly in New York this week.
Never one to miss an opportunity, the UN has filled the toilet-roll holders at the UN with custom-printed toilet paper. It advertises World Toilet Day on November 19 and urges them to support Goal 6. It is a pitch for the new sustainable development goals the United Nations has set. Goal 6 is to "ensure availability and sustainable management of water and sanitation for all".
Outside the toilets, the diplomatic hustle was well under way by the time Prime Minister John Key arrived yesterday. Key has his own goals to achieve and, like the United Nations, he has no shame when it comes to making a pitch for them. While US President Barack Obama and Russian President Vladimir Putin wrestle with Syria, Key intends to be the mosquito buzzing in Obama's ear.
Key got only slightly defensive at jibes about the attention the likes of Obama and Putin were getting compared with himself. While media were advised to arrive at sparrow's fart because of the queues expected for the Obama and Putin speeches, no such warning was issued for Key.
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His lineup of one-on-one meetings with other leaders is rather humble although, admittedly, most are from countries bigger than New Zealand so possibly it is they who drew the short straw. When it comes to the global giants he will have to rely on his charms to try to capture some time at the official receptions for the leaders.
He will lay on that charm, because the real aim of Key's visit is the Trans Pacific Partnership. Talks are in the make-or-break stage in Atlanta and whether world peace emerges from the General Assembly or not, when Key leaves, he wants that TPP in his doggy bag. So he fitted in a reception hosted by Japan's Prime Minister, Shinzo Abe, at the last minute, even though it meant running the gauntlet of meeting his arch critic, Fiji's Prime Minister, Frank Bainimarama.
Obama is next in his sights. If he fails to get that quality time, perhaps he could take a cue from the UN and write his wish list on the toilet paper.