KEY POINTS:
Until now, the return of Halley's Comet was the biggest public fizzer in my lifetime. But the Government's breathlessly awaited Auckland local government reform proposals have given the un-fiery comet some stiff competition.
Neither exactly lit up the night sky.
Instead of producing a radical plan of reform,
the Government has tossed Auckland's governance problems back to the lunatics and told them to reform their own asylum. Or more accurately, to keep talking about reforming their own asylum.
Local Government Minister Mark Burton revealed to Auckland mayors last Friday that government had embraced "in principle" the blancmange-like compromise Auckland's councils agreed to in December.
And he wanted to work "collaboratively" and "co-operatively" with Auckland councils to develop the proposals.
For a Government of "bold decisions" it's a wimp-out. Calling for further discussions all but rules out any legislative changes before the October local government elections.
And if legislative changes are not in the wind, then any reforms the government has in mind will be at best, cosmetic.
Never have words spoke louder than action than in the minister's media statement. "Co-ordinated strategic planning across the Auckland region is critical to ensuring Auckland can compete as a 21st century city ... greater co-ordination and a unified vision are critical for the region ... ministers agree with the need for a stronger regional governance structure with enhanced funding mechanisms and resources ... blah de blah de blah ... '
But despite all these "criticals", all the minister announced was more consultation.
If the ministers genuinely agree in the need for stronger regional governance, why haven't they put up something for our inspection? Expecting the deeply divided Auckland politicians to come up with anything other than last December's compromise is wasting time.
Then there's the "One Plan" for the whole region, which Mr Burton has said is critical. But if it is as critical as he says, when is he going to say that the December model, which he appears to endorse, doesn't do the trick.
The "One Plan" as advocated by Auckland local councils - all no doubt reluctant to surrender any of their own power - was voluntary only. Drawn up by a Regional Sustainable Development Forum, it would not be a binding greater "district plan" but more a toothless mission statement linking and integrating regional plans for roading, housing, urban development and the like.
An intriguing quote in Mr Burton's statement is that such a forum "would represent the agencies responsible for the plan's funding and implementation".
That at least seems to rule out the business community's campaign to have un-elected appointees planted in the forum. But does it mean that Mr Burton is hinting that central government appointees could have a place, representing funding agencies such as Land Transport New Zealand.
What sparked off central government's interest in reforming Auckland's local government was the big four Auckland mayors' sudden rush-of-blood-to-the-head proposal to create a greater Auckland regional council sitting atop three largely impotent city councils. The regional council hit back with a plan for an enhanced version of itself. The Government then bashed everyone's heads together and told them to produce a joint reform plan by December.
Unfortunately for the mayors, who were hoping to replace the ARC with something more to their liking, the great Rugby World Cup fiasco broke out and the ARC and, in particular, chairman Mike Lee emerged as the people's hero. For the majority of us who opposed the waterfront site and the government's bullying tactics anyway.
What that row showed was that Auckland already has an elected regional body not afraid to speak up for the region. Replacing it with something similar seems nuts - or to be political revenge, and hopefully the Government sees that campaign for what it is.
Enhancing the power and scope of the existing ARC seems the simple and least disruptive solution. That, and ensuring any One Plan is binding across the region.
These are not hard decisions to make. But expecting the inmates to make them is ridiculous. Mr Burton should earn his keep and act.