Mandy had her last hit of P six months ago. Yesterday, the West Auckland solo mother, 36, stepped out with 100 marchers to warn against the dangers of the drug she says ruins lives - and which pushed her close to suicide several times.
Mandy has three boys, aged 12,
10 and 8, and to protect them withholds her surname. But she tells her story to encourage others to believe that there is life after P: "You will see yourself again, see how you were before P took over your life."
She started off as a "recreational" user four years ago - but laughs hollowly as she says so.
The drug, also known as crystal meth or speed - P is a name unique to New Zealand - is not something to treat casually. "It takes you quickly. It changes your personality. You lose your self-respect. You don't think about consequences."
Mandy was "only just functional", holding down both full- and part-time jobs, but her habit cost her $500 to $700 a week, gobbling all her income and savings and putting her heavily into debt. She got a gambling addiction and became "aggro" with her kids.
When she came down after a hit, Mandy was suicidal. "I came this close" - here she holds her thumb and index finger millimetres apart - "to taking my own life. Life just seemed too complicated."
It took her two attempts to quit, with the help of Community Alcohol and Drug Services West and her family. "They never gave up, even when I would push them away."
The Fight Against P march was organised by Pukekohe grandmother Marie Cotter, a budget adviser.
The marchers will walk through towns and cities, taking buses between them. In Wellington on Thursday they will lay wreaths on the steps of Parliament in memory of the lives lost to P.
Primary schoolchildren, many from P homes, will present MPs with a wish-list of changes to Government drug policy - including more treatment programmes, a dedicated, anonymous call centre, compulsory drug education in schools and tougher penalties for drug dealers.
As the march of about 100 people moved down Queen St to Britomart, the chant went up: "One, two, three, four, say no to P and shut the door!"
It was an open and warm atmosphere, and people shared their tales with the Herald - but often withheld their names, fearing retaliation from dealers.
An Auckland couple, both in their early 50s, talked about their son, on remand in jail awaiting sentence for more than 35 burglary charges committed to purchase P. He wanted to quit - but had not been able to find a rehabilitation programme without a long waiting list.
He had been able to get P inside and turned up "fried" at court one day. "We feel very badly let down by the system," says his father.
Adds his mother: "It just breaks our heart. He really wants to be normal and it goes out the window when he gets on."
On her first demonstration, pensioner Betty Murray walked Queen St holding a wreath on which was taped a picture of her grandson Sam Todd, aged 20 when P claimed him in 2003.
The march, she confessed, was "terrible" for the memories it dredged up.
Ms Cotter expects to see many tears shed during the march as people share their P stories. Yesterday she was "elated" at the turnout.
MARCH ROUTE
Today
* Ngaruawahia (assembling at River Rd) 8.15am.
* Hamilton (Victoria St) 9am.
* Cambridge (Queen St) 10am.
* Tirau (Rangipai Rd) 11am.
* Rotorua (Memorial Drive) 12.15pm.
* Tokoroa (Logan St) 2pm.
* Taupo (Taupo Domain) 3.30pm.
* Overnight at Nukuhau Marae.
Tomorrow
* Turangi (McLaren Park) 9.45am.
* Waiouru (Andrews Rd) 11.05am.
* Taihape (Hautapu St) 11.45am.
* Palmerston North (Rangitikei St) 2.15pm.
* Levin (Tyme St) 3.15pm.
* Otaki (Mill Rd) (4pm).
* Overnight at an Otaki marae.
Thursday
* Paraparaumu (Aorangi Rd) 9.15am.
* Porirua (Te Rauparaha Park) 10.15am.
* Wellington (Railway Station) 11.15am for march to Parliament.
How you can help
* Make a donation to the FightAgainstP bank account at any ASB Bank, account number 12-3023-0632784-00.
* Donate food to feed the marchers, petrol for the transport, T- shirts, printing, buses, mini-buses and advertising.
* Contact the campaign at www.fightagainstp.com (see link below).
Anti-P protesters take to the roads
MPs Pita Sharples (second left) and Paul Hutchison join the march. Pictures / Dean Purcell
Mandy had her last hit of P six months ago. Yesterday, the West Auckland solo mother, 36, stepped out with 100 marchers to warn against the dangers of the drug she says ruins lives - and which pushed her close to suicide several times.
Mandy has three boys, aged 12,
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