Abusive young sportsman fails in bid to overturn protection order that prevents him from competing

Judge Catriona Doyle said the young man had psychologically and sexually abused his young girlfriend. Photo / 123rf

A teenage sportsman accused of sexually and emotionally abusing a 14-year-old girl for several years has failed in a bid to be allowed to continue competing in the sport where he met her.

The now 17-year-old boy was effectively barred from playing the sport if the girl is present at an event after a protracted Family Court fight where his former girlfriend’s parents successfully won a protection order against him.

That order was enforced after the parents found that he had emotionally and sexually abused their daughter, calling her names like “n****r” and “monkey” as well as commenting on her weight and allegedly pressuring the underage girl into having sex with him.

The names and ages of everyone involved, the area they live and even the code of the sport are involved in have all been redacted by the Family Court which instead gave the teens pseudonyms “Corey Nichols” and “Ross Conway”.

According to a recently released decision, Nichols was 12 when she met 15-year-old Conway at a sport they both played. They entered into a relationship several years later, which quickly turned sexual.

When Nichols’ parents, Kathy and Richard Nichols (also court pseudonyms), became aware of the true nature of the relationship they confronted Conway and informed him that having sex with a 14-year-old was illegal and that it needed to stop.

The Nichols then took steps to limit their daughter’s ability to see Conway. As a result, she distanced herself from them and continued to see him anyway, even running away from home and wagging school to spend time with him.

Richard Nichols told the court Conway had contacted his employer to make a complaint about him and asked how he could get him fired.

Richard Nichols also claimed that Conway called him to brag about the sexual relationship he had with his daughter in an attempt to goad him – and then when Nichols threatened him, he took a recording of the call to the police.

The court even suppressed the code of sport the young man was effectively barred from playing. Photo / 123rf

On May 8, Corey Nichols disclosed everything about her relationship with Conway to police, but they didn’t press charges against him – despite her being underage.

Her parents then obtained a temporary protection order on May 22, followed by a special condition a day later that allowed police to uplift Nichols from Conway’s home and grant her parents the ability to refuse contact of any kind between the pair.

Conway breached that order on multiple occasions by messaging Nichols on a variety of social media platforms, though these communications ceased in November 2023.

On August 21, one day before that temporary protection order would have become permanent, Conway filed a notice with the court that he didn’t oppose a final protection order being made, but he wanted it to be varied so he could attend sports competitions and tournaments.

Under the terms of the protection order, Conway was not permitted to attend these sporting events if Nichols was present or competing unless her mother consented.

The variation Conway requested would have enabled him to be at tournaments and competitions that Nichols and her family might also be attending, and allow him to play and compete on the basis he would stay away from his former girlfriend and her family.

Parents say daughter manipulated, groomed

Kathy and Richard Nichols say their daughter was the victim of psychological and sexual abuse, manipulation and grooming from Conway, who they say used coercion and control to isolate their daughter from her family.

They say Conway pressured their daughter into having sex with him and told her it would be her fault if he cheated on her with other women.

The Nichols alleged Conway called her names, commented on her weight, threatened to end their relationship if she didn’t make herself available to him, took her away from her family without their knowledge or consent and attempted to coerce her into living with him.

Nichols’ parents say that while their daughter now has a good understanding of the unhealthy dynamics of her relationship with Conway, they fear that varying the protection order to allow him to play in the same tournaments will provide him with an opportunity to contact her.

They worry that Conway doesn’t recognise the illegal nature of the relationship nor the harm he caused – and that without the protection order, there would be a real risk of him engaging in repeat and damaging behaviour towards their daughter.

She was represented by her own counsel who made her views clear to the court: she wants the protection order to be made final, and does not want there to be a special condition allowing Conway to attend sporting events.

For his part, Conway admitted entering into a sexual relationship with Nichols when she was just 14 and there’s a record of him asking her to lie to the police if she was ever asked about the extent of their relationship.

Ross Conway attempted to contact Corey Nichols on a number of social media applications, despite a protection order. Photo / 123rf

According to the court judgment, Conway had no concerns about the illegality of having sex with someone under the age of 16, in part because police never charged him with statutory rape – despite knowing about the relationship.

He denies having groomed Nichols and denies having pressured her into sex. He claims their relationship was normal involving them hanging out, watching movies, and doing things that most teenage couples engage in, including having sex.

Conway doesn’t want to have any further contact with Nichols but does want to be able to play the sport he says he’s invested a lot of time in and the protection order has so far put his sporting career on hold and not being able to play has had a hugely negative impact on him.

He told the court he didn’t want to attend sporting events where Nichols may be present, but wanted to compete in separate, ranked competitions that the protection order prevented him from entering.

‘Sexually and emotionally abused’

Judge Catriona Doyle, who presided over the case, said it was unclear why police did not press charges of statutory rape against Conway after Nichols made a full disclosure to them on May 8, 2023.

“As I explained to Ross at the hearing, at its most basic, this is a case about a young woman who was sexually and emotionally abused from the age of 14 years old until her parents took legal steps to remove her from her abuser,” Judge Doyle said.

“Her abuser is now seeking permission to attend events where he will have access to her and the family who he threatened when they took steps to protect her.”

Doyle said Conway was a young man himself at the time the abuse occurred and didn’t appreciate how serious his behaviour was, but this didn’t change the fact that he abused Nichols and caused her harm.

“Now, he asks to be free to participate in an activity which is important to him. However, Corey remains a very vulnerable young woman and her need for protection is the court’s primary concern. She is entitled to be safe and to feel safe from having further contact with Ross,” Judge Doyle said.

Judge Doyle dismissed Conway’s bid to have the protection order varied and it will instead stay in place until Nichols turns 18.

Jeremy Wilkinson is an Open Justice reporter based in Manawatū covering courts and justice issues with an interest in tribunals. He has been a journalist for nearly a decade and has worked for NZME since 2022.