After proving himself as a master of turning comic books into visually tantalising films, Zack Snyder was allowed to create his dream project. One seemingly inspired by a particularly fiery bout of REM sleep after watching Inception. He must have leaned over and drawn his dream on a notepad by his bed. A dream within a dream within a dream within a dream ...

The lead dreamer is Babydoll (played by wide-eyed, pouty Emily Browning) - Brigitte Bardot dressed as part harajuku girl, Lara Croft, and Victoria's Secret Model.

She falls into the first dream - a bordello where the likes of Vanessa Hudgens (High School Musical) sashay around in garter belts and fake eyelashes - when she is strapped down in a haunting 1960s asylum ready for a lobotomy.

She tumbles into the second - pleather skirts and bazookas in WWI trenches and combustible computer game settings - when she is performing a sensual dance for her pimp.

The resulting collage of action flicks and burlesque could have been a masterpiece if Snyder had allowed someone to help him inject just a little bit of suspense into the plot, and scrap the dialogue altogether.

You want babes with bazookas? Then don't force the characters to slip into contrived, pseudo-existential crises.

It dodges the sucker punch entirely.

LOWDOWN
Stars:
2.5/5
Cast: Emily Browning, Abbie Cornish, Vanessa Hudgens, John Hamm
Director: Zack Snyder
Rating: M (violence)
Running Time: 110 mins
Verdict: Feeble fanboy fantasy.

-TimeOut