Mike Clark's Business Bites: The quality of our relationships determines the quality of our lives

Communication, in all its forms, is the oil that helps people and teams function smoothly. Photo / Unsplash

OPINION:

When it is all said and done and your race is finally run, what will your greatest memories be? When you sift through all you have been and all you have seen, what will stand out? Will you reflect with wonder and delight or despair and regret on what you did and didn't do?

When running a training session, I like to ask people what they want to ensure I cover. As I have shared before, the most common requests focus on improving communication and confidence.

The desires to be more confident within oneself and to be able to communicate effectively both point to the importance people place on their interactions with other people. Intuitively, people understand the way you present yourself makes a difference, both internally to yourself and externally to others.

Confidence is one of the fastest-transferred human emotions. It forms part of the unspoken communication we trade in daily. Communication, in all its forms, is the oil that helps people and teams function smoothly. The better the quality and timing of communication, the greater the chances a team will grow and succeed. The speed (and quality) of feedback equals the speed of success. Stephen Covey explored this in-depth with his excellent work, The Speed of Trust: The One Thing That Changes Everything.

Trust is the foundation of relationships. People need relationships. There is a groundswell trend being led by people like Brené Brown towards being authentic, which requires being vulnerable. This is countercultural. We have spent years putting on a face and being "proper". This worked in a world where communication was predominantly interpersonal.

The exponential increase in technology has both facilitated an ability to communicate at speed and reduced the time required for connection to do this. We can communicate with more people more quickly with each passing day. The growing trend towards 'being real' highlights the increasing realisation that much of our current construct of reality is stealing what is important to us. Can you relate to having a broader network of connections at the sacrifice of depths of connection?

If you work with a team, be aware that, long-term, people need relationships more than anything. The quality of our relationships determines the quality of our lives. What do you do to ensure people are connected within your workplace? For all the technology we have and the ability to communicate, there is a steadily increasing number of people reporting loneliness.

Humans are social beings. We are wired for relationships. People need people, and the longest-running study of adults - the Harvard Study of Adult Development, which has been going for over 75 years - has shown that positive meaningful relationships have a huge impact on our lives, from health to happiness. When all is said and done, life is more about who you did life with than what you have done.

• Mike Clark is director and lead trainer and facilitator at Think Right business training company.