"You're doing awesome." "What a complete moron."
Two completely different statements but both often heard on the sideline at sports matches.
About 800 students had the chance last week to consider the kind things they would like to hear at events and what they say to others.
They were taking part in a Kind Hearts regional day to help build a kindness culture in Manawatū schools.
The day was held at the Awapuni Racecourse last Wednesday. Some 400 Year 1 to 4 students attended the morning session and in the afternoon it was the turn of 400 Year 5 to 8 students. They came from 23 schools.
One of the speakers was Joanne Guy. The Feilding author and mother of murdered farmer Scott Guy told the students if they say harsh or mean words it is like throwing conkers at someone's heart.
"Words hurt a lot, they cut deep."
Encouraging words can build people up and make them feel better.
Guy said sometimes kids have worries that start small but get bigger, and it is important they talk to someone about their worries. She encouraged them to find a lighthouse person to show them the way, someone who shines brightly.
"I've found kids are really good at finding a lighthouse person, they are just as smart [as adults]."
Fusi Feaunati, head coach for the Manawatū Cyclones, spotted Leo Webb in the crowd wearing a Turbos shirt. The 11-year-old Mount Biggs School student asked the Turbos to sign his shirt after playing a match before them about two years ago.
Feaunati used Leo to demonstrate his point about needing a rock to help you. When anxious think about the people important to you, Feaunati said.
The Manawatū Rugby Union coach development manager told the students that when you play sport things do not always work out the way you want. There might be a dead ball, a missed line, or you don't get to play as long as want to, but that's okay.
Feaunati told the Guardian whānau for the rugby union is not just people who like rugby but people who like being around other people. Some people go to Turbos and Cyclones games not to watch the rugby but to experience being in a crowd, soak up the atmosphere and show their provincial pride. Therefore, it was important to encourage people to have positive behaviours.
Children's entertainer Suzy Cato spoke and sung kind messages while Rayz Roadshow's Ray Cooper and his American possum talked about road safety.