NZ Herald
  • Home
  • Latest news
  • Herald NOW
  • Video
  • New Zealand
  • Sport
  • World
  • Business
  • Entertainment
  • Podcasts
  • Quizzes
  • Opinion
  • Lifestyle
  • Travel
  • Viva
  • Weather

Subscriptions

  • Herald Premium
  • Viva Premium
  • The Listener
  • BusinessDesk

Sections

  • Latest news
  • New Zealand
    • All New Zealand
    • Crime
    • Politics
    • Education
    • Open Justice
    • Scam Update
  • Herald NOW
  • On The Up
  • World
    • All World
    • Australia
    • Asia
    • UK
    • United States
    • Middle East
    • Europe
    • Pacific
  • Business
    • All Business
    • MarketsSharesCurrencyCommoditiesStock TakesCrypto
    • Markets with Madison
    • Media Insider
    • Business analysis
    • Personal financeKiwiSaverInterest ratesTaxInvestment
    • EconomyInflationGDPOfficial cash rateEmployment
    • Small business
    • Business reportsMood of the BoardroomProject AucklandSustainable business and financeCapital markets reportAgribusiness reportInfrastructure reportDynamic business
    • Deloitte Top 200 Awards
    • CompaniesAged CareAgribusinessAirlinesBanking and financeConstructionEnergyFreight and logisticsHealthcareManufacturingMedia and MarketingRetailTelecommunicationsTourism
  • Opinion
    • All Opinion
    • Analysis
    • Editorials
    • Business analysis
    • Premium opinion
    • Letters to the editor
  • Politics
  • Sport
    • All Sport
    • OlympicsParalympics
    • RugbySuper RugbyNPCAll BlacksBlack FernsRugby sevensSchool rugby
    • CricketBlack CapsWhite Ferns
    • Racing
    • NetballSilver Ferns
    • LeagueWarriorsNRL
    • FootballWellington PhoenixAuckland FCAll WhitesFootball FernsEnglish Premier League
    • GolfNZ Open
    • MotorsportFormula 1
    • Boxing
    • UFC
    • BasketballNBABreakersTall BlacksTall Ferns
    • Tennis
    • Cycling
    • Athletics
    • SailingAmerica's CupSailGP
    • Rowing
  • Lifestyle
    • All Lifestyle
    • Viva - Food, fashion & beauty
    • Society Insider
    • Royals
    • Sex & relationships
    • Food & drinkRecipesRecipe collectionsRestaurant reviewsRestaurant bookings
    • Health & wellbeing
    • Fashion & beauty
    • Pets & animals
    • The Selection - Shop the trendsShop fashionShop beautyShop entertainmentShop giftsShop home & living
    • Milford's Investing Place
  • Entertainment
    • All Entertainment
    • TV
    • MoviesMovie reviews
    • MusicMusic reviews
    • BooksBook reviews
    • Culture
    • ReviewsBook reviewsMovie reviewsMusic reviewsRestaurant reviews
  • Travel
    • All Travel
    • News
    • New ZealandNorthlandAucklandWellingtonCanterburyOtago / QueenstownNelson-TasmanBest NZ beaches
    • International travelAustraliaPacific IslandsEuropeUKUSAAfricaAsia
    • Rail holidays
    • Cruise holidays
    • Ski holidays
    • Luxury travel
    • Adventure travel
  • Kāhu Māori news
  • Environment
    • All Environment
    • Our Green Future
  • Talanoa Pacific news
  • Property
    • All Property
    • Property Insider
    • Interest rates tracker
    • Residential property listings
    • Commercial property listings
  • Health
  • Technology
    • All Technology
    • AI
    • Social media
  • Rural
    • All Rural
    • Dairy farming
    • Sheep & beef farming
    • Horticulture
    • Animal health
    • Rural business
    • Rural life
    • Rural technology
    • Opinion
    • Audio & podcasts
  • Weather forecasts
    • All Weather forecasts
    • Kaitaia
    • Whangārei
    • Dargaville
    • Auckland
    • Thames
    • Tauranga
    • Hamilton
    • Whakatāne
    • Rotorua
    • Tokoroa
    • Te Kuiti
    • Taumaranui
    • Taupō
    • Gisborne
    • New Plymouth
    • Napier
    • Hastings
    • Dannevirke
    • Whanganui
    • Palmerston North
    • Levin
    • Paraparaumu
    • Masterton
    • Wellington
    • Motueka
    • Nelson
    • Blenheim
    • Westport
    • Reefton
    • Kaikōura
    • Greymouth
    • Hokitika
    • Christchurch
    • Ashburton
    • Timaru
    • Wānaka
    • Oamaru
    • Queenstown
    • Dunedin
    • Gore
    • Invercargill
  • Meet the journalists
  • Promotions & competitions
  • OneRoof property listings
  • Driven car news

Puzzles & Quizzes

  • Puzzles
    • All Puzzles
    • Sudoku
    • Code Cracker
    • Crosswords
    • Cryptic crossword
    • Wordsearch
  • Quizzes
    • All Quizzes
    • Morning quiz
    • Afternoon quiz
    • Sports quiz

Regions

  • Northland
    • All Northland
    • Far North
    • Kaitaia
    • Kerikeri
    • Kaikohe
    • Bay of Islands
    • Whangarei
    • Dargaville
    • Kaipara
    • Mangawhai
  • Auckland
  • Waikato
    • All Waikato
    • Hamilton
    • Coromandel & Hauraki
    • Matamata & Piako
    • Cambridge
    • Te Awamutu
    • Tokoroa & South Waikato
    • Taupō & Tūrangi
  • Bay of Plenty
    • All Bay of Plenty
    • Katikati
    • Tauranga
    • Mount Maunganui
    • Pāpāmoa
    • Te Puke
    • Whakatāne
  • Rotorua
  • Hawke's Bay
    • All Hawke's Bay
    • Napier
    • Hastings
    • Havelock North
    • Central Hawke's Bay
    • Wairoa
  • Taranaki
    • All Taranaki
    • Stratford
    • New Plymouth
    • Hāwera
  • Manawatū - Whanganui
    • All Manawatū - Whanganui
    • Whanganui
    • Palmerston North
    • Manawatū
    • Tararua
    • Horowhenua
  • Wellington
    • All Wellington
    • Kapiti
    • Wairarapa
    • Upper Hutt
    • Lower Hutt
  • Nelson & Tasman
    • All Nelson & Tasman
    • Motueka
    • Nelson
    • Tasman
  • Marlborough
  • West Coast
  • Canterbury
    • All Canterbury
    • Kaikōura
    • Christchurch
    • Ashburton
    • Timaru
  • Otago
    • All Otago
    • Oamaru
    • Dunedin
    • Balclutha
    • Alexandra
    • Queenstown
    • Wanaka
  • Southland
    • All Southland
    • Invercargill
    • Gore
    • Stewart Island
  • Gisborne

Media

  • Video
    • All Video
    • NZ news video
    • Herald NOW
    • Business news video
    • Politics news video
    • Sport video
    • World news video
    • Lifestyle video
    • Entertainment video
    • Travel video
    • Markets with Madison
    • Kea Kids news
  • Podcasts
    • All Podcasts
    • The Front Page
    • On the Tiles
    • Ask me Anything
    • The Little Things
  • Cartoons
  • Photo galleries
  • Today's Paper - E-editions
  • Photo sales
  • Classifieds

NZME Network

  • Advertise with NZME
  • OneRoof
  • Driven Car Guide
  • BusinessDesk
  • Newstalk ZB
  • Sunlive
  • ZM
  • The Hits
  • Coast
  • Radio Hauraki
  • The Alternative Commentary Collective
  • Gold
  • Flava
  • iHeart Radio
  • Hokonui
  • Radio Wanaka
  • iHeartCountry New Zealand
  • Restaurant Hub
  • NZME Events

SubscribeSign In
Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.
Home / Lifestyle

'You have no right to be here': Dad told to leave parents' room in mall

Vera Alves
By Vera Alves
NZ Herald Planning Editor and Herald on Sunday columnist·NZ Herald·
26 Sep, 2020 10:31 PM4 mins to read

Subscribe to listen

Access to Herald Premium articles require a Premium subscription. Subscribe now to listen.
Already a subscriber?  Sign in here

Listening to articles is free for open-access content—explore other articles or learn more about text-to-speech.
‌
Save

    Share this article

Josh Anderson was in the parents' room with his baby daughter when a mum told him to leave. Photo / Supplied

Josh Anderson was in the parents' room with his baby daughter when a mum told him to leave. Photo / Supplied

An Auckland dad was told by an angry mum to leave the parents' room where he was looking after his baby daughter.

Josh Anderson was out with his 5-month-old daughter at the Westfield in Manukau when he needed to change her nappy and give her a bottle.

He visited the parents' room in the mall, where he tended to his baby and then used the toilet.

When he came out of the cubicle with his daughter, one of the mums in the room reportedly approached him angrily and told him he couldn't be in there.

Mum Kori Anderson says she was "absolutely livid" when her husband got home and told her about the interaction with the other mum.

Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.
Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.

"He took her to the parents room' to change her and give her a bottle. He then took her in her pram to the toilet cubicle within the parents' room, so he could use the bathroom himself - the photo of the parent sign was on the cubicle door within the parents' room," she told the Herald.

"He came out of the cubicle with my daughter and the lady waiting with her son (maybe 5-years-old) straight away said 'you're not allowed to use this facility because it's for women only. Can you not see the sign? You have no right!'"

The mother reportedly pointed to the sign on the door, which shows an adult and a child, both wearing skirts.

Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.
The sign on the door. Photo / Supplied
The sign on the door. Photo / Supplied

The dad asked the woman what he was meant to do and whether she thought he should take his daughter in her pram into the men's room to change her there.

"That's what all the men are supposed to do," the woman reportedly told him.

The dad left the room to contact mall management and, on his way, found a cleaner near another toilet. He asked the cleaner whether the parents' room was for all parents or just for mums.

"The cleaner said 'of course all parents are welcome to use it, mums and dads,'" Anderson recalled.

According to the dad's wife, who spoke to the Herald, the dad later returned to the parents' room to feed his daughter again.

"He later returned to the parent room to give me daughter another bottle, not fazed by what had happened but still angry for the same reasons as me. He's angry because he had the pram, shopping, my daughter and so using the men's room was not suitable because he didn't want to leave the pram out and there was nowhere to change her. He didn't want to go to the parents' room and change my daughter and then take her to the men's room and leave her in the pram out in the open whilst he used the bathroom himself in the men's room," Anderson said.

"I was absolutely livid when he told me what had happened. We are living in a society where we are encouraging all parents to take equal responsibility for their children, encouraging stay-at-home dads, encouraging dads to take on the role historically assumed by the mother," the mum added.

Josh is a proud father to a five-month-old daughter. Photo / Supplied
Josh is a proud father to a five-month-old daughter. Photo / Supplied

"My daughter shouldn't have to be taken to the men's room where there are no change facilities just because my husband has been made to feel unwelcome in the parents' room simply because he is a man."

The mum posted about the incident on social media, to draw attention to the fact that parents' room are for all parents and not just for mothers. According to Anderson, while her husband knew his rights, others might not.

"He knows his rights and loves being able to be there for his daughter. Her needs come first and he wasn't going to let the incident stop them for using facilities intended for them," she said.

Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.

The couple intend to follow up with Westfield management and file a complaint.

Contacted by the Herald, a Westfield Manukau spokesperson confirmed that the "Parents' rooms are provided for the use of all parents, carers and guardians".

Save

    Share this article

Latest from Lifestyle

Lifestyle

'Hero of my life': Tim Wilson on adoption, faith and fatherhood

21 Jun 05:00 PM
Premium
Lifestyle

'Two small boys left fatherless and their mother cast as a scarlet woman'

20 Jun 10:00 PM
Premium
Lifestyle

Everything Millennial is cool again

20 Jun 06:00 PM

Help for those helping hardest-hit

sponsored
Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.

Latest from Lifestyle

'Hero of my life': Tim Wilson on adoption, faith and fatherhood

'Hero of my life': Tim Wilson on adoption, faith and fatherhood

21 Jun 05:00 PM

He shares how waiting decades to find his birth parents has enriched his own brood's life.

Premium
'Two small boys left fatherless and their mother cast as a scarlet woman'

'Two small boys left fatherless and their mother cast as a scarlet woman'

20 Jun 10:00 PM
Premium
Everything Millennial is cool again

Everything Millennial is cool again

20 Jun 06:00 PM
Lemony bow tie pasta with broccoli and macadamia crunch

Lemony bow tie pasta with broccoli and macadamia crunch

20 Jun 05:00 PM
Inside Leigh Hart’s bonkers quest to hand-deliver a SnackaChangi chip to every Kiwi
sponsored

Inside Leigh Hart’s bonkers quest to hand-deliver a SnackaChangi chip to every Kiwi

NZ Herald
  • About NZ Herald
  • Meet the journalists
  • Newsletters
  • Classifieds
  • Help & support
  • Contact us
  • House rules
  • Privacy Policy
  • Terms of use
  • Competition terms & conditions
  • Our use of AI
Subscriber Services
  • NZ Herald e-editions
  • Daily puzzles & quizzes
  • Manage your digital subscription
  • Manage your print subscription
  • Subscribe to the NZ Herald newspaper
  • Subscribe to Herald Premium
  • Gift a subscription
  • Subscriber FAQs
  • Subscription terms & conditions
  • Promotions and subscriber benefits
NZME Network
  • The New Zealand Herald
  • The Northland Age
  • The Northern Advocate
  • Waikato Herald
  • Bay of Plenty Times
  • Rotorua Daily Post
  • Hawke's Bay Today
  • Whanganui Chronicle
  • Viva
  • NZ Listener
  • Newstalk ZB
  • BusinessDesk
  • OneRoof
  • Driven Car Guide
  • iHeart Radio
  • Restaurant Hub
NZME
  • About NZME
  • NZME careers
  • Advertise with NZME
  • Digital self-service advertising
  • Book your classified ad
  • Photo sales
  • NZME Events
  • © Copyright 2025 NZME Publishing Limited
TOP