Ways to help someone with depression

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Depression is a serious illness. The recent deaths of high profile people such as Robin Williams and Charlotte Dawson have started conversations around this topic, but we still have a long way to go.

World suicide prevention week is ends on 14 September 2014. Because one in six New Zealanders will experience serious depression at some time, it is likely you will know someone who is experiencing it, or has had depression (which is often recurrent).

Read: WHO report maps global suicide problem for the first time

People with support will cope better than on their own. According to depression.org.nz, there are some ways you can help.

What you can do to help

• Spend time with them.
• Listen rather than talk - let them tell you how it is for them.
• Learn about depression - how it is treated and what you can do to help recovery.
• See yourself as part of their support team.
• Understand how depression is affecting their daily life.
• Help the person to recognise and find ways of dealing with things that are worrying them.
• Help and encourage them to lead a healthy life, to exercise and to do things they enjoy.
• Support and encourage them to keep getting whatever support or treatment is offered.
• Take any thoughts of suicide seriously - it's okay to talk about it. Don't leave someone alone if they feel unsafe. Contact a health care provider or a crisis phone line.

These tactics are not helpful

• Tell them to 'snap out of it' or 'harden up'. People cannot 'will' themselves better from moderate or severe depression.
• Encourage excess alcohol and drug use as a coping strategy - it can make things worse.
• Avoid them - they already feel isolated and this can make their depression worse.
• Assume the problem will just go away.
• Judge or criticise them for what they're going through.
• Lose hope - they need you to believe they will get through this.
• Give unhelpful advice - for example, 'just think of people who are worse off'.

Take care

Supporting someone with depression can take its toll, so it's important to look after yourself, too. Youth depression website, thelowdown.co.nz says helping someone "too much" can be overwhelming, particularly if the person is relying on you as their only source of support. They may need professional support.

Where to get help:

• Lifeline: 0800 543 354 (available 24/7)

• Suicide Crisis Helpline: 0508 828 865 (0508 TAUTOKO) (available 24/7)

• Youth services: (06) 3555 906

• Youthline: 0800 376 633

• Kidsline: 0800 543 754 (4pm to 6pm weekdays)

• Whatsup: 0800 942 8787 (1pm to 11pm)

• The Word

• Depression helpline: 0800 111 757 (available 24/7)

• Rainbow Youth: (09) 376 4155

• CASPER Suicide Prevention

If it is an emergency and you feel like you or someone else is at risk, call 111.