I'm not ashamed to say that I love John. He has been a more constant presence in my life than any relationship. As a tricky teenager, he was like my translator to the world: "Oh don't worry about Mic, he's just a bit ... different." As we have grown up and gone out into the world of work, our friendship has only deepened. We've been through bands, break-ups, death and marriages. The friendship has endured all of them. A truly great best friend feels like a brother; a brother you have actively chosen to be yoked to.
Fiction and history books strain at their bindings with stories of great male friendships: Sherlock and Watson; Hunt and Lauda; Lennon and McCartney; Statler and Waldorf; Scott and Oates; Hall and Oates for God's sake. None of them are "bromances": that terrible term that belongs only in fraudulent frat movies. The Blues Brothers shows a great male friendship. The Commitments is full of them, while Reservoir Dogs shows what happens when they go tits up. Male friendship is not about Jackass and The Hangover. It is not crass, base and strictly superficial.
We are more comfortable about celebrating female friendship. Sisters doing it for themselves. The entire Destiny's Child discography is dedicated to women who can pay their own bills (although "auto-mo-bills?", really Beyonce?), love their friends and just kick arse. That the band revolved entirely around Beyonce and that the other girls were as expendable as her hair extensions appears to be inconsequential. Male friendship in pop music is largely of the Boys R Back In Town school of thought. Men have gangs and banter. And there's obviously something to that. But a true friendship goes beyond the boisterous surface.
Regardless of how my relationships go, of how my work life fairs, my friendship with John is a constant. Beyond my mum and dad and my grandparents, he is the person I most trust in the world. In any crisis, in any danger, in any moment of joy or tragedy, my finger jumps to his number in my phone's contacts. That level of love and respect deserves far better than a jokey, punning reduction. It is not a bromance and never will be.