It is amazing being in your 50s. The best. You feel fitter, look hotter, your confidence is at warp factor 10 and building. Are you getting this at the back? You can wear what you like (apart from frills, but that's only Alexandra Shulman's opinion, not Yasmin Le Bon's) and
The seven myths about being 50
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1: Looking 50-slim (in jeans and exercise leggings)
Maybe. But have you seen us with them off? These jeans are actually the 21st century equivalent of corsets.

2: Being 50-fanciable
Some people may fancy us but not those we think (younger strangers). They don't. If we are lucky they think we're okay for our age. But they're almost certainly thinking nothing about us, and if they are it's, "Ah, what a nice mum."
3: The children are on their way
Well they're not really, and they may well be worrying us more than ever. And they never reply to family WhatsApps (even though they know you can see when they read them). Unbelievable.

4: Having better sex
Not going into detail with this but definitely had more 10 years ago — and with less faff.
5: Knowing our own minds
We no longer pretend we like jazz, or saunas, and it takes us a lot less time to pick a drink in a pub but, then again, we have no idea what to wear to the lunch party on Saturday. We might ring someone else to check.

6: Nothing to prove
Sure. Except when you have people coming to dinner (only six) so you think you'll attempt the lamb-with-sumac thing and then you don't sleep the night before. We were far more relaxed in this department 15 years ago, when people weren't Ottolenghi-savvy and before you were expected to make your own hummus. Pre 50-shaming, in fact.
7: Discovered our own style
Well, in theory. But no one tells you that every year your style stash is depleted by one item. No one owns up that the white jeans that made you look like Francoise Hardy (ish) now make you look like Tonya Harding; and your black velvet jacket (Brian Jones) is now pure Camilla Parker Bowles.
In fact, there's lots they're not telling us actually.
