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Home / Lifestyle

Steve Braunias: The secret 2017 horoscopes part one

Steve Braunias
By Steve Braunias
Senior Writer·NZ Herald·
30 Dec, 2016 04:00 PM4 mins to read

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Here is the only horoscope you need for 2017. Photo / 123RF
Here is the only horoscope you need for 2017. Photo / 123RF

Here is the only horoscope you need for 2017. Photo / 123RF

Steve Braunias
Opinion by Steve Braunias
Steve Braunias writes for the Listener and Newsroom.
Learn more

CAPRICORN (Dec 23-Jan 20)
Consider this Aesop's fable. "There was once a Bald Man who sat down after work on a hot summer's day. A Fly came up and kept buzzing about his head, stinging him from time to time. The Bald Man aimed a blow at his little enemy, but his palm came on his head instead. Again the Fly tormented him, but this time the Bald Man was wiser and said to himself, 'You will only injure yourself if you take notice of despicable enemies.'" You know exactly what this is getting at and you will do well to heed the moral if you want peace and prosperity in 2017.

AQUARIUS (January 21-February 19)
Your year ahead will be determined by your response to this Aesop's fable. "A Man came into a wood one day with an axe in his hand, and begged all the Trees to give him a small branch. The Trees were good-natured and obliged his request. But the Man fixed the branch on to the blade of his axe, and set to work cutting down Tree after Tree. The Trees saw how foolish they had been in giving their enemy the means of destroying themselves." In other words: recognise opportunities, and be careful who you trust. What you want to be in 2017 is half Man, half Tree.

PISCES (Feb 20-Mar 20)
Aesop had this to say about Pots - and it's as though he wrote it looking into your soul. "Two Pots had been left on the bank of a river, one of brass, and one of earthenware. When the tide rose they both floated off down the stream. The earthenware Pot tried its best to keep aloof from the brass one, which cried out, 'Fear nothing, friend, I will not strike you.' The earthenware replied, 'But I may come in contact with you if I come too close; and whether I hit you, or you hit me, I shall suffer for it.'" The brass Pot in your life could be a spouse, a child, an employer, or a stranger; a tide will surely come, so remain vigilant in 2017.

ARIES (Mar 21-Apr 20)
What's your answer to the riddle in this Aesop's fable? "An old Labourer, bent double with age and toil, was gathering sticks in a forest. He grew so tired and hopeless that he threw down the bundle of sticks, and cried out, 'I cannot bear this life any longer. I wish Death would only come and take me!' As he spoke, Death, a grisly skeleton, appeared by his side. 'Please, sir,' said the Labourer, 'would you kindly help me to lift this faggot of sticks on to my shoulder?'" Death's response is not recorded. Certainly you'll be confronted with profound burdens in 2017; the trick is to persevere, and not moan so much.

TAURUS (Apr 21-May 21)
Are you the Horse or the Ass in this Aesop's fable? "A Horse and an Ass were travelling together, the Horse prancing along, the Ass carrying a heavy load. 'I wish I were you,' sighed the Ass, 'nothing to do and well fed, and all that fine harness upon you'. Next day, however, there was a great battle, and the Horse was fatally wounded. The Ass passed by and found the Horse on the point of death. 'I was wrong,' said the Ass. 'Better humble security than gilded danger.'" Really? Or it better to live life to the fullest, than resign yourself to drudgery? Weigh up the options carefully as 2017 approaches.

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GEMINI (May 22-Jun 21)
Another Aesop's fable; another riddle. It holds the key to 2017. "Once upon a time there was a Miser who used to hide his gold in his garden. Every week he dug it up and gloated over his wealth. But a Robber saw him, and stole the gold. When the Miser came the following week, he found nothing but the empty hole. He tore his hair and wailed. His Neighbour said, 'When you came to gloat, did you ever take out any of the gold?' asked one of them. He said, 'No, I only came to look at it.' The neighbour replied, 'Then come again and look at the hole. It'll do you just as much good.'" What?

• Part two next week of the only horoscope you need for 2017.

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