S.P.Q.R.

By EWAN McDONALD for viva

The initials get them going. Hardly anyone who has wandered past the one-time motorbike mechanics' garage, been tickled by cappuccino foam at a footpath table or cuddled a Cosmopolitan at the bar has been able to resist making up their own translation for S.P.Q.R., most relying heavily on the same interpretation of the third letter.

Those forced to take Latin at high school know that it stands for "Senatus Populusque Romanus ", the Senate and People of Rome. Appropriate, given the ivy, iron grille and stone (okay, concrete) decor and its denizens' reputation - fairly or unfairly - for the sort of hedonistic behaviour that might leave Caligula, Nero or Jacobi blushing.

Guess that's what you get for being an icon in Ponsonby for more than a decade. Yes, S.P.Q.R. has lasted longer than the Hero Parade: hangout of the famous and the famous-for-15 minutes; late-night or all-night haven for the relentlessly, sometimes tragically, hip; and, next morning, recovery room offering the ultimate in comfort food, boiled egg with soldiers (3- or 4-minute, free range, $7.75).

Chris Rupe and Paula Macks, the owners, have taken over the former cane shop next door, part of the garage until the grease monkeys moved out and the Men and Women in Black moved in during the 90s. It's opened as Chandelier, an upmarket restaurant reviewed last week, rather than the cafe, bar and eatery that is S.P.Q.R. Not surprising that they may have been preoccupied with that; unfortunate if they have taken their eye off the ball.
The pavement tables and courtyard are packed when we arrive around 7 on one of Auckland's more humid evenings. It's a catch-all crowd, from the platinum-rinsed grandma in Osti print to the office-shirt-but-lost-the-tie-for-January parties, and the lads in black T-shirts admiring the last woman east of Avondale who takes her fashion advice from Stevie Nicks.

"Smoking or non?" Non, for us, so we're given a table at least 2m from the nearest puffer. Because it tends towards bar custom, there's a long if not broad wine selection, all available by the glass, and heavily marked up.

The Palliser pinot noir is available at other restaurants for less than $52.50 and they will (a) open the bottle at the table and (b) have a quick glance to make sure that the glass isn't chipped.

It can be a tad sharp when opened, or until the food arrives, but this isn't a great problem tonight because "sharp" is the word that comes to mind when recalling our meals.

The chicken salad was smeared, or more accurately doused, in a sauce that went straight for the back of the throat and grabbed it; the gnocchi did come with blue cheese, but it may not have been a gorgonzola that knows where to find home when it gets off Alitalia.

Confit of duck is now so common in Ponsonby restaurants that you wonder if they'll permit shooting in Western Park next May 1. That makes it a good barometer. This night, someone in the kitchen achieves something which has eluded cooks for centuries, drying it out so much that the duck tastes not unlike chicken, then trying to hide the mistake under less-than-vintage balsamic.

No such complaints, however, about the snapper, a generous, moist, fresh serving that had been oven-roasted considerately, and slipped on to the plate alongside a similarly tender saffron and lime risotto.
Over the years the waiters here have perfected disinterest to a level where you have to wonder whether they're required to list it as a hobby on their CVs.

Ours was an over-achiever, displaying a level of boredom that left us musing whether the next day's audition, clearly on his mind, was for a new production of the musical Chicago or for a breakfast TV presenter. Whichever, we passed on his offer of dolci when he finally got around to asking us.

Now, before you splutter into your flat white and dive for the keyboard to thrash out a defence of your favourite spot, there were plenty of diners around us and they were enjoying themselves.

Yes, S.P.Q.R. has been a reliable place to eat for a long time. On this visit it wasn't.

Open: Monday-Friday 11am-2am, Saturday and Sunday 10am-2am

Owners: Chris Rupe, Paula Macks

Food: Italian, traditional and modern

On the Menu: Caesar salad with cos lettuce, parboiled egg, anchovies, bacon and croutons $17.50; Pappardelle with oxtail stew, shredded prosciutto, tomato ragu $18.50; Oven-roasted snapper with saffron lime risotto, rocket, reggiano parmesan, virgin oil, chardonnay vinaigrette $24.50

Vegetarian: It's Italian - so no problem!

Wine: Lengthy list of the usual suspects, mostly home-grown, all available by the glass

Smoking: Six feet of separation

Noise: Oh, definitely, and DJs play Friday and Saturday nights

Bottom line: S.P.Q.R and its crown have been the most relentlessly cool inhabitants of Ponsonby Rd for more than a decade. But that's more as a daytime café, weekend bruncher and all-night bar than a restaurant. You can't help thinking that the management, preoccupied with their venture next door, might have taken their eye off the ball a little.

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