It's time to stop making excuses and take action. Follow these steps to pare back an overstuffed life. Photo / Getty Images
It's time to stop making excuses and take action. Follow these steps to pare back an overstuffed life. Photo / Getty Images
The most important thing you can tell yourself about decluttering is that there will never be the perfect moment to start and very few sane people enjoy it, but you will almost always be glad you did it once it’s done.
Many of us live overstuffed lives: too many books,too many clothes, too many things that might just come in useful one day. But the mythical “one day” seldom comes. The day it does - inevitably - arrive in our lives is the one when we’re forced by circumstance to pare down, either by a house move or bereavement, and at that point, we wonder why we have held on to so many possessions for so long.
Clutter is the physical embodiment of procrastination. It is a great kindness to our future selves to keep on top of it. Many of us promise ourselves we will put aside a week, a weekend, a whole day to tackle the attic or our wardrobes, but there are always far more tempting ways to spend our time. So, how do we declutter when we really don’t want to?
Stealth decluttering
Banish perfectionism and don’t wait for the ideal moment. Get into the habit of doing a little and often. You can go through a kitchen drawer and get rid of old takeaway menus, useless bits of string and perished elastic bands in the time it takes to boil the kettle.
When you’re sorting the laundry, promise yourself you’ll never again wash a piece of clothing that’s past its best, doesn’t fit and doesn’t make you feel good. No one needs more than two old T-shirts to wear while painting or doing DIY, unless they’re a professional. Get rid of them. And no, if they’re in a bad state, the local charity shop won’t be glad of them either.
Put a recycling bin next to where you open the post and immediately ditch anything you don’t need to keep.
Fifteen-minute fling
Get a bin bag and a kitchen timer, or use the timer on your phone. Set it for 15 minutes and race around, cramming as much into the bag as you can, anything you no longer want or use. Repeat daily until you feel on top of everything. Some of these things can go directly into the bin, but some may be suitable for the charity shop or resale via eBay, Facebook Marketplace or other resale apps, but don’t let this become another source of procrastination. Set a deadline for getting it out of the house.
You can clear out a drawer in the time it takes to boil a kettle. Photo / Getty Images
Thirty-day fling
I devised this game when I was first attempting to declutter my own house. On the first day, I cleared the dining table and placed just one object, an old paperback, on top.
On the second day, I put two things on the table and so on, until on the 30th day I heaped 30 more things on there, making a grand total of 465 objects.
The idea is to start slowly, and by the time the month is out, you become more ruthless about what has to go.
Decluttering with a deadline
If you’re moving house, particularly if you’re downsizing, the more you can get rid of now, the simpler you’ll make your life later.
Remember that if you don’t sort your possessions out now, you’ll have to sort them out later at the other end. This is like packing up procrastination in a very expensive box, paying someone else to transport it and unload it, and then still having to deal with it, often in a smaller space. Give yourself a fresh start. Do it now. If nothing else, it will reduce your moving costs.
Consider members of your family or friends who might like certain items. There is a satisfaction in thinking they will have a whole new life with someone else. Give them a deadline for collecting their treasures.
Putting things in storage should be a very last resort. I have met countless people who have spent thousands keeping their possessions in storage for years, waiting for the perfect moment, when they have the perfect space. Guess what? Most of them can’t even remember half of what they have in those units. Do you really need it?
Some clothes may be suitable for the charity shop or resale - but don't let this become another source of procrastination.
Swedish death cleaning
I highly recommend Margareta Magnusson’s The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning. It’s not as macabre as it sounds. In part, it encourages you to get your affairs in order and divest yourself of junk so that no one else has to do it for you after you die; but more essentially, she describes how much freer and calmer you will feel when you are no longer the full-time curator of your needlessly elaborate life.
“Death cleaning is not about dusting or mopping up,” she explains. “It is about a permanent form of organisation that makes your everyday life run more smoothly.”
Decluttering after death
This is the most fraught and emotionally challenging decluttering of all. It’s not a job any of us want, but it is something most of us have to do at some point.
Set manageable goals and don’t try to do too much at once. Think up small rewards for yourself after completing each stage.
Start with the least emotionally charged things. It’s easier to throw away bottles of shampoo than it is to go through old letters. It will help you build up a little momentum for when you get to the more difficult pieces.
Call in others to help. Try to pick people who will support you emotionally and keep you focused, not push you into working faster than you can bear.
Inevitably, you may be in a situation where you have to deal with other family members, and that’s not always easy. When emotions are heightened, it’s easy to get sucked in to rehashing old dramas. Try to remain detached if you can. I find repeating to myself “Do you want to be right, or do you want to be happy?” helps in moments like this. No sideboard or first edition is worth sacrificing your equilibrium for.
Remember, you’re not throwing the person out, you’re just disposing of – for the most part – unwanted things. Your memories are precious, and you don’t even need to find space for them.
