NZ Herald
  • Home
  • Latest news
  • Herald NOW
  • Video
  • New Zealand
  • Sport
  • World
  • Business
  • Entertainment
  • Podcasts
  • Quizzes
  • Opinion
  • Lifestyle
  • Travel
  • Viva
  • Weather

Subscriptions

  • Herald Premium
  • Viva Premium
  • The Listener
  • BusinessDesk

Sections

  • Latest news
  • New Zealand
    • All New Zealand
    • Crime
    • Politics
    • Education
    • Open Justice
    • Scam Update
  • Herald NOW
  • On The Up
  • World
    • All World
    • Australia
    • Asia
    • UK
    • United States
    • Middle East
    • Europe
    • Pacific
  • Business
    • All Business
    • MarketsSharesCurrencyCommoditiesStock TakesCrypto
    • Markets with Madison
    • Media Insider
    • Business analysis
    • Personal financeKiwiSaverInterest ratesTaxInvestment
    • EconomyInflationGDPOfficial cash rateEmployment
    • Small business
    • Business reportsMood of the BoardroomProject AucklandSustainable business and financeCapital markets reportAgribusiness reportInfrastructure reportDynamic business
    • Deloitte Top 200 Awards
    • CompaniesAged CareAgribusinessAirlinesBanking and financeConstructionEnergyFreight and logisticsHealthcareManufacturingMedia and MarketingRetailTelecommunicationsTourism
  • Opinion
    • All Opinion
    • Analysis
    • Editorials
    • Business analysis
    • Premium opinion
    • Letters to the editor
  • Politics
  • Sport
    • All Sport
    • OlympicsParalympics
    • RugbySuper RugbyNPCAll BlacksBlack FernsRugby sevensSchool rugby
    • CricketBlack CapsWhite Ferns
    • Racing
    • NetballSilver Ferns
    • LeagueWarriorsNRL
    • FootballWellington PhoenixAuckland FCAll WhitesFootball FernsEnglish Premier League
    • GolfNZ Open
    • MotorsportFormula 1
    • Boxing
    • UFC
    • BasketballNBABreakersTall BlacksTall Ferns
    • Tennis
    • Cycling
    • Athletics
    • SailingAmerica's CupSailGP
    • Rowing
  • Lifestyle
    • All Lifestyle
    • Viva - Food, fashion & beauty
    • Society Insider
    • Royals
    • Sex & relationships
    • Food & drinkRecipesRecipe collectionsRestaurant reviewsRestaurant bookings
    • Health & wellbeing
    • Fashion & beauty
    • Pets & animals
    • The Selection - Shop the trendsShop fashionShop beautyShop entertainmentShop giftsShop home & living
    • Milford's Investing Place
  • Entertainment
    • All Entertainment
    • TV
    • MoviesMovie reviews
    • MusicMusic reviews
    • BooksBook reviews
    • Culture
    • ReviewsBook reviewsMovie reviewsMusic reviewsRestaurant reviews
  • Travel
    • All Travel
    • News
    • New ZealandNorthlandAucklandWellingtonCanterburyOtago / QueenstownNelson-TasmanBest NZ beaches
    • International travelAustraliaPacific IslandsEuropeUKUSAAfricaAsia
    • Rail holidays
    • Cruise holidays
    • Ski holidays
    • Luxury travel
    • Adventure travel
  • Kāhu Māori news
  • Environment
    • All Environment
    • Our Green Future
  • Talanoa Pacific news
  • Property
    • All Property
    • Property Insider
    • Interest rates tracker
    • Residential property listings
    • Commercial property listings
  • Health
  • Technology
    • All Technology
    • AI
    • Social media
  • Rural
    • All Rural
    • Dairy farming
    • Sheep & beef farming
    • Horticulture
    • Animal health
    • Rural business
    • Rural life
    • Rural technology
    • Opinion
    • Audio & podcasts
  • Weather forecasts
    • All Weather forecasts
    • Kaitaia
    • Whangārei
    • Dargaville
    • Auckland
    • Thames
    • Tauranga
    • Hamilton
    • Whakatāne
    • Rotorua
    • Tokoroa
    • Te Kuiti
    • Taumaranui
    • Taupō
    • Gisborne
    • New Plymouth
    • Napier
    • Hastings
    • Dannevirke
    • Whanganui
    • Palmerston North
    • Levin
    • Paraparaumu
    • Masterton
    • Wellington
    • Motueka
    • Nelson
    • Blenheim
    • Westport
    • Reefton
    • Kaikōura
    • Greymouth
    • Hokitika
    • Christchurch
    • Ashburton
    • Timaru
    • Wānaka
    • Oamaru
    • Queenstown
    • Dunedin
    • Gore
    • Invercargill
  • Meet the journalists
  • Promotions & competitions
  • OneRoof property listings
  • Driven car news

Puzzles & Quizzes

  • Puzzles
    • All Puzzles
    • Sudoku
    • Code Cracker
    • Crosswords
    • Cryptic crossword
    • Wordsearch
  • Quizzes
    • All Quizzes
    • Morning quiz
    • Afternoon quiz
    • Sports quiz

Regions

  • Northland
    • All Northland
    • Far North
    • Kaitaia
    • Kerikeri
    • Kaikohe
    • Bay of Islands
    • Whangarei
    • Dargaville
    • Kaipara
    • Mangawhai
  • Auckland
  • Waikato
    • All Waikato
    • Hamilton
    • Coromandel & Hauraki
    • Matamata & Piako
    • Cambridge
    • Te Awamutu
    • Tokoroa & South Waikato
    • Taupō & Tūrangi
  • Bay of Plenty
    • All Bay of Plenty
    • Katikati
    • Tauranga
    • Mount Maunganui
    • Pāpāmoa
    • Te Puke
    • Whakatāne
  • Rotorua
  • Hawke's Bay
    • All Hawke's Bay
    • Napier
    • Hastings
    • Havelock North
    • Central Hawke's Bay
    • Wairoa
  • Taranaki
    • All Taranaki
    • Stratford
    • New Plymouth
    • Hāwera
  • Manawatū - Whanganui
    • All Manawatū - Whanganui
    • Whanganui
    • Palmerston North
    • Manawatū
    • Tararua
    • Horowhenua
  • Wellington
    • All Wellington
    • Kapiti
    • Wairarapa
    • Upper Hutt
    • Lower Hutt
  • Nelson & Tasman
    • All Nelson & Tasman
    • Motueka
    • Nelson
    • Tasman
  • Marlborough
  • West Coast
  • Canterbury
    • All Canterbury
    • Kaikōura
    • Christchurch
    • Ashburton
    • Timaru
  • Otago
    • All Otago
    • Oamaru
    • Dunedin
    • Balclutha
    • Alexandra
    • Queenstown
    • Wanaka
  • Southland
    • All Southland
    • Invercargill
    • Gore
    • Stewart Island
  • Gisborne

Media

  • Video
    • All Video
    • NZ news video
    • Herald NOW
    • Business news video
    • Politics news video
    • Sport video
    • World news video
    • Lifestyle video
    • Entertainment video
    • Travel video
    • Markets with Madison
    • Kea Kids news
  • Podcasts
    • All Podcasts
    • The Front Page
    • On the Tiles
    • Ask me Anything
    • The Little Things
  • Cartoons
  • Photo galleries
  • Today's Paper - E-editions
  • Photo sales
  • Classifieds

NZME Network

  • Advertise with NZME
  • OneRoof
  • Driven Car Guide
  • BusinessDesk
  • Newstalk ZB
  • Sunlive
  • ZM
  • The Hits
  • Coast
  • Radio Hauraki
  • The Alternative Commentary Collective
  • Gold
  • Flava
  • iHeart Radio
  • Hokonui
  • Radio Wanaka
  • iHeartCountry New Zealand
  • Restaurant Hub
  • NZME Events

SubscribeSign In
Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.
Home / Lifestyle

Single women should ditch Facebook - expert

Daily Mail
5 Nov, 2013 08:15 PM3 mins to read

Subscribe to listen

Access to Herald Premium articles require a Premium subscription. Subscribe now to listen.
Already a subscriber?  Sign in here

Listening to articles is free for open-access content—explore other articles or learn more about text-to-speech.
‌
Save

    Share this article

Ladies, be cafeful of Facebook bringing out the green eyed monster.Photo / Thinkstock

Ladies, be cafeful of Facebook bringing out the green eyed monster.Photo / Thinkstock

Single women should get off Facebook because the "perfect lives" of their friends are bad for their health, a relationship expert has warned.

Author Zoe Strimpel says the social media site bombards singletons with pictures of "perfect" weddings and babies which causes envy and voyeurism.

Facebook shares an unhealthy amount of information.Photo / File
Facebook shares an unhealthy amount of information.Photo / File

"What [Facebook] does is it enhances the sense that your life is lacking and specifically, when you are single, you focus in on all those pictures of perfect weddings, perfect babies, perfect couples," she said.

'Perfect' wedding pictures don't make single women feel that awesome.Photo / Thinkstock
'Perfect' wedding pictures don't make single women feel that awesome.Photo / Thinkstock
Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.
Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.

She urged single women to cut down or get rid of Facebook completely during a lecture at Cambridge's Festival of Ideas.

She said getting rid of your profile will help "limit that delicious but yucky feeling of voyeurism, slight envy, maybe even narcissism."

Ms Strimpel, who wrote Man Diet: One Woman's Quest to End Bad Romance, said the fairer sex also spends too much time monitoring potential suitors online.

She said the ready availability of biographical information on Facebook encourages women to over-analyse potential dates.

"You become addicted to information that you might not need to know about, say, Joe the musician who you drunkenly snogged at a house warming, but who turns out has a girlfriend.

Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.

"Thanks to Facebook you may know his mother's name, the details of his last holiday, the names of his exes, who he is hanging around with.

"This is not healthy or helpful information, plus it gives the impression that these men are more in your life than they actually are, which is quite corrosive.

"There's plenty of psychology that supports taking a break from social media."

On a more positive note, The Joy of Sex rewriter Susan Quilliam told the same conference modern women have never had it better in bed.

Discover more

Lifestyle

Third of men spy on potential partners

22 Jan 01:25 AM

The psychologist, single at 63 after her marriage of 25 years ended, said women are free to enjoy sex - unlike her mother who didn't know what her clitoris was.

"I can, if I so wish, go out and sleep with somebody tonight without opprobrium, without being told I'm a slut.

"Well there are some people who will still think I'm a slut, but largely we are lucky.

"We are lucky post pill and post the Abortion Act to be able to know and decide where, what, who, how and also whether and where to look for sex - and where things are and what to do with them.

"My mother admitted to me she did not know what her clitoris was."

Ms Strimpel and Ms Quilliam were joined by The Erotic Review founder Rowan Pelling to discuss "How to be a single woman in 2013, whether you're 25 or 60".

Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.

Explaining the inspiration for her book, Ms Strimpel added: "I was 28 and I just had broken up with a boyfriend - 'Oh my God I'm single, I'd better act single'."

"I've got to in some way channel Samantha from Sex and the City. What this meant was seeing a lot of men, most of whom I didn't particularly like, and going on dates even when I would have preferred to stay in with a cup of tea and a book.

Women are far more free to channel their inner Samantha, the sexually liberated character from Sex & The City.
Women are far more free to channel their inner Samantha, the sexually liberated character from Sex & The City.

"It meant a lot of drinking, a lot of staying out late and feeling hungover at work, which was horrible.

"It meant telling a lot of funny stories about my capers to my friends, who loved it and they wanted more and more, and spending a lot time worrying about various guys that I don't even remember now.

"There was fun goodness and yucky badness. For some reason the badness was getting the upper hand."

- DAILY MAIL

Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.
Save

    Share this article

Latest from Lifestyle

Premium
Lifestyle

The 39 definitive rules of office fashion

19 Jun 12:00 AM
Lifestyle

The three tools leading the charge in arthritis pain relief

18 Jun 11:12 PM
Premium
Lifestyle

Exactly what long car journeys do to your body

18 Jun 08:00 PM

Sponsored: Embrace the senses

sponsored
Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.

Latest from Lifestyle

Premium
The 39 definitive rules of office fashion

The 39 definitive rules of office fashion

19 Jun 12:00 AM

Washington Post: Sweatpants? No. But elastic waistbands? Absolutely.

The three tools leading the charge in arthritis pain relief

The three tools leading the charge in arthritis pain relief

18 Jun 11:12 PM
Premium
Exactly what long car journeys do to your body

Exactly what long car journeys do to your body

18 Jun 08:00 PM
Princess Kate unexpectedly cancels appearance at Royal Ascot

Princess Kate unexpectedly cancels appearance at Royal Ascot

18 Jun 06:57 PM
Help for those helping hardest-hit
sponsored

Help for those helping hardest-hit

NZ Herald
  • About NZ Herald
  • Meet the journalists
  • Newsletters
  • Classifieds
  • Help & support
  • Contact us
  • House rules
  • Privacy Policy
  • Terms of use
  • Competition terms & conditions
  • Our use of AI
Subscriber Services
  • NZ Herald e-editions
  • Daily puzzles & quizzes
  • Manage your digital subscription
  • Manage your print subscription
  • Subscribe to the NZ Herald newspaper
  • Subscribe to Herald Premium
  • Gift a subscription
  • Subscriber FAQs
  • Subscription terms & conditions
  • Promotions and subscriber benefits
NZME Network
  • The New Zealand Herald
  • The Northland Age
  • The Northern Advocate
  • Waikato Herald
  • Bay of Plenty Times
  • Rotorua Daily Post
  • Hawke's Bay Today
  • Whanganui Chronicle
  • Viva
  • NZ Listener
  • Newstalk ZB
  • BusinessDesk
  • OneRoof
  • Driven Car Guide
  • iHeart Radio
  • Restaurant Hub
NZME
  • About NZME
  • NZME careers
  • Advertise with NZME
  • Digital self-service advertising
  • Book your classified ad
  • Photo sales
  • NZME Events
  • © Copyright 2025 NZME Publishing Limited
TOP