NZ Herald
  • Home
  • Latest news
  • Herald NOW
  • Video
  • New Zealand
  • Sport
  • World
  • Business
  • Entertainment
  • Podcasts
  • Quizzes
  • Opinion
  • Lifestyle
  • Travel
  • Viva
  • Weather

Subscriptions

  • Herald Premium
  • Viva Premium
  • The Listener
  • BusinessDesk

Sections

  • Latest news
  • New Zealand
    • All New Zealand
    • Crime
    • Politics
    • Education
    • Open Justice
    • Scam Update
  • Herald NOW
  • On The Up
  • World
    • All World
    • Australia
    • Asia
    • UK
    • United States
    • Middle East
    • Europe
    • Pacific
  • Business
    • All Business
    • MarketsSharesCurrencyCommoditiesStock TakesCrypto
    • Markets with Madison
    • Media Insider
    • Business analysis
    • Personal financeKiwiSaverInterest ratesTaxInvestment
    • EconomyInflationGDPOfficial cash rateEmployment
    • Small business
    • Business reportsMood of the BoardroomProject AucklandSustainable business and financeCapital markets reportAgribusiness reportInfrastructure reportDynamic business
    • Deloitte Top 200 Awards
    • CompaniesAged CareAgribusinessAirlinesBanking and financeConstructionEnergyFreight and logisticsHealthcareManufacturingMedia and MarketingRetailTelecommunicationsTourism
  • Opinion
    • All Opinion
    • Analysis
    • Editorials
    • Business analysis
    • Premium opinion
    • Letters to the editor
  • Politics
  • Sport
    • All Sport
    • OlympicsParalympics
    • RugbySuper RugbyNPCAll BlacksBlack FernsRugby sevensSchool rugby
    • CricketBlack CapsWhite Ferns
    • Racing
    • NetballSilver Ferns
    • LeagueWarriorsNRL
    • FootballWellington PhoenixAuckland FCAll WhitesFootball FernsEnglish Premier League
    • GolfNZ Open
    • MotorsportFormula 1
    • Boxing
    • UFC
    • BasketballNBABreakersTall BlacksTall Ferns
    • Tennis
    • Cycling
    • Athletics
    • SailingAmerica's CupSailGP
    • Rowing
  • Lifestyle
    • All Lifestyle
    • Viva - Food, fashion & beauty
    • Society Insider
    • Royals
    • Sex & relationships
    • Food & drinkRecipesRecipe collectionsRestaurant reviewsRestaurant bookings
    • Health & wellbeing
    • Fashion & beauty
    • Pets & animals
    • The Selection - Shop the trendsShop fashionShop beautyShop entertainmentShop giftsShop home & living
    • Milford's Investing Place
  • Entertainment
    • All Entertainment
    • TV
    • MoviesMovie reviews
    • MusicMusic reviews
    • BooksBook reviews
    • Culture
    • ReviewsBook reviewsMovie reviewsMusic reviewsRestaurant reviews
  • Travel
    • All Travel
    • News
    • New ZealandNorthlandAucklandWellingtonCanterburyOtago / QueenstownNelson-TasmanBest NZ beaches
    • International travelAustraliaPacific IslandsEuropeUKUSAAfricaAsia
    • Rail holidays
    • Cruise holidays
    • Ski holidays
    • Luxury travel
    • Adventure travel
  • Kāhu Māori news
  • Environment
    • All Environment
    • Our Green Future
  • Talanoa Pacific news
  • Property
    • All Property
    • Property Insider
    • Interest rates tracker
    • Residential property listings
    • Commercial property listings
  • Health
  • Technology
    • All Technology
    • AI
    • Social media
  • Rural
    • All Rural
    • Dairy farming
    • Sheep & beef farming
    • Horticulture
    • Animal health
    • Rural business
    • Rural life
    • Rural technology
    • Opinion
    • Audio & podcasts
  • Weather forecasts
    • All Weather forecasts
    • Kaitaia
    • Whangārei
    • Dargaville
    • Auckland
    • Thames
    • Tauranga
    • Hamilton
    • Whakatāne
    • Rotorua
    • Tokoroa
    • Te Kuiti
    • Taumaranui
    • Taupō
    • Gisborne
    • New Plymouth
    • Napier
    • Hastings
    • Dannevirke
    • Whanganui
    • Palmerston North
    • Levin
    • Paraparaumu
    • Masterton
    • Wellington
    • Motueka
    • Nelson
    • Blenheim
    • Westport
    • Reefton
    • Kaikōura
    • Greymouth
    • Hokitika
    • Christchurch
    • Ashburton
    • Timaru
    • Wānaka
    • Oamaru
    • Queenstown
    • Dunedin
    • Gore
    • Invercargill
  • Meet the journalists
  • Promotions & competitions
  • OneRoof property listings
  • Driven car news

Puzzles & Quizzes

  • Puzzles
    • All Puzzles
    • Sudoku
    • Code Cracker
    • Crosswords
    • Cryptic crossword
    • Wordsearch
  • Quizzes
    • All Quizzes
    • Morning quiz
    • Afternoon quiz
    • Sports quiz

Regions

  • Northland
    • All Northland
    • Far North
    • Kaitaia
    • Kerikeri
    • Kaikohe
    • Bay of Islands
    • Whangarei
    • Dargaville
    • Kaipara
    • Mangawhai
  • Auckland
  • Waikato
    • All Waikato
    • Hamilton
    • Coromandel & Hauraki
    • Matamata & Piako
    • Cambridge
    • Te Awamutu
    • Tokoroa & South Waikato
    • Taupō & Tūrangi
  • Bay of Plenty
    • All Bay of Plenty
    • Katikati
    • Tauranga
    • Mount Maunganui
    • Pāpāmoa
    • Te Puke
    • Whakatāne
  • Rotorua
  • Hawke's Bay
    • All Hawke's Bay
    • Napier
    • Hastings
    • Havelock North
    • Central Hawke's Bay
    • Wairoa
  • Taranaki
    • All Taranaki
    • Stratford
    • New Plymouth
    • Hāwera
  • Manawatū - Whanganui
    • All Manawatū - Whanganui
    • Whanganui
    • Palmerston North
    • Manawatū
    • Tararua
    • Horowhenua
  • Wellington
    • All Wellington
    • Kapiti
    • Wairarapa
    • Upper Hutt
    • Lower Hutt
  • Nelson & Tasman
    • All Nelson & Tasman
    • Motueka
    • Nelson
    • Tasman
  • Marlborough
  • West Coast
  • Canterbury
    • All Canterbury
    • Kaikōura
    • Christchurch
    • Ashburton
    • Timaru
  • Otago
    • All Otago
    • Oamaru
    • Dunedin
    • Balclutha
    • Alexandra
    • Queenstown
    • Wanaka
  • Southland
    • All Southland
    • Invercargill
    • Gore
    • Stewart Island
  • Gisborne

Media

  • Video
    • All Video
    • NZ news video
    • Herald NOW
    • Business news video
    • Politics news video
    • Sport video
    • World news video
    • Lifestyle video
    • Entertainment video
    • Travel video
    • Markets with Madison
    • Kea Kids news
  • Podcasts
    • All Podcasts
    • The Front Page
    • On the Tiles
    • Ask me Anything
    • The Little Things
  • Cartoons
  • Photo galleries
  • Today's Paper - E-editions
  • Photo sales
  • Classifieds

NZME Network

  • Advertise with NZME
  • OneRoof
  • Driven Car Guide
  • BusinessDesk
  • Newstalk ZB
  • Sunlive
  • ZM
  • The Hits
  • Coast
  • Radio Hauraki
  • The Alternative Commentary Collective
  • Gold
  • Flava
  • iHeart Radio
  • Hokonui
  • Radio Wanaka
  • iHeartCountry New Zealand
  • Restaurant Hub
  • NZME Events

SubscribeSign In
Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.
Home / Lifestyle

Shelley Bridgeman: Have you heard about rising multiple-partner fertility?

Shelley Bridgeman
By Shelley Bridgeman
Herald online·
20 Mar, 2013 09:00 PM5 mins to read

Subscribe to listen

Access to Herald Premium articles require a Premium subscription. Subscribe now to listen.
Already a subscriber?  Sign in here

Listening to articles is free for open-access content—explore other articles or learn more about text-to-speech.
‌
Save

    Share this article

Research suggests: 1 out of 5 women have kids with multiple dads and 1 out of 10 men have kids with multiple partners.Photo / Thinkstock

Research suggests: 1 out of 5 women have kids with multiple dads and 1 out of 10 men have kids with multiple partners.Photo / Thinkstock

Shelley Bridgeman
Opinion by Shelley Bridgeman
Shelley Bridgeman is a columnist for Lifestyle at The New Zealand Herald.
Learn more

One teen dad, many mothers, 13 kids was a headline guaranteed to shock. It revealed the news that a "rogue 19-year-old is a liable father to 13 kids to different mums". If financial assistance such as domestic purposes benefits and accommodation supplements were required to raise these children, the writer calculated that "benefits to support those 13 babies could be costing the taxpayer more than $200,000 a year."

Dame Lesley Max of the Great Potentials foundation said, "In our work, we've become only too aware of older men who have tom-catted their way through life, leaving damaged children with damaged mothers. But what we're now learning about the same behaviour in teenagers is a new shock."

Presumably, at least some of the "older men" she's referring to include those middle-aged males with a penchant for giving Wife Number One the flick and trading her in for a younger model with whom he starts a second family - conveniently unimpeded by his first family. It's a textbook scenario of a mid-life crisis and one that occurs with sufficient frequency that it doesn't seem to be especially noteworthy.

While the teenager who fathered 13 children to different mothers has been variously criticised for his irresponsibility and his promiscuity as well as the financial burden many people believe he has created for the taxpayer, his story is really just a small (if extreme) part of a much larger social trend. The experts call this style of serial procreation "multiple-partner fertility". It's a trend that growing numbers of researchers and social commentators are wary of.

The research paper Men Who Father Children with More Than One Woman: A Contemporary Portrait of Multiple-Partner Fertility states that: "Multiple-partner fertility has potentially negative consequences for men, women and children. Couples report lower relationship quality and higher conflict in relationships in which either the mother or the father has had children with previous partners ... [W]hen men have children with more than one woman, it is difficult for men to balance their financial and social responsibilities to more than one family" and "[i]ncarceration is more prevalent among men who exhibit multiple-partner fertility" and they are "more likely to report that they used illegal drugs in the previous year".

Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.
Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.

Almost 20 years ago an Independent piece explored "fathers with more than one family" and underscored what many of us have ascertained from simple observation: that "[a]n increasing number of men are breaking up with their wives, then having more children with new partners." The case studies revealed common themes of strained relationships, resentment, financial difficulties, divided loyalties and guilt that can arise from the creation of second families.

According to Multiple Partner Fertility Inc, a US-based organisation devoted to breaking this "vicious cycle" of parenting, "1 out of 5 women have children with multiple dads. 1 out of 10 men... has children with multiple partners. Men and women having children with a variety of partners is on the rise." Interestingly, men are more likely to be accused of "tom-catting" yet more women are said to engage in multiple-partner fertility.

In 2007 I wrote about this group of women in Who's the Daddy?, an article inspired by the coining of a new term for women having children with more than one man: they are "multi-dadding", according to British journalist Lucy Cavendish - who herself has experienced multiple-partner fertility. I suggested that the trend could be attributed to "[h]igh divorce rates, declining marriage rates, extended child-bearing years and more liberal attitudes in general".

'Domino-Dad' Families: Many Women Have Kids With More Than One Man reported that "[m]ore than a quarter of all U.S. mothers with more than one child had some of those kids with different men, according to a new study." It also drew on a University of Michigan report which found that "[m]ultiple partner fertility is an important part of contemporary America family life, and a key component to the net of disadvantage that many poor and uneducated women face".

While the trend is well-documented overseas, it seems to fly somewhat under the radar in New Zealand. This dearth of information and these low levels of awareness as to how it's impacting on families here seem at odds with a society which claims to be concerned with the wellbeing of Kiwi children. Perhaps in a strange way we should be thankful for the 19-year-old "rogue" father of 13 who has managed to highlight this issue in a way that legions of less prolific examples of multiple-partner fertility have failed to.

Discover more

Opinion

Blog: Is it ok to be single?

24 Oct 11:45 PM
Opinion

Which side do you sleep on?

18 Nov 09:30 PM
Opinion

Blog: Carters timed it right

02 Dec 09:15 PM
Opinion

Can you kiss your cousin?

06 Mar 10:40 PM

What are your views on multiple-partner fertility? Have you noticed it is becoming more common - and, if so, why do you think that might be? What are the positive outcomes and what are the problems associated with it? Do we need to raise awareness of and generate discussion about this issue?

Save

    Share this article

Latest from Lifestyle

Premium
Lifestyle

How to tackle your to-do list if you struggle with executive functioning

17 Jun 06:00 PM
Premium
Lifestyle

Josh Emett and the eclair that became an icon

Premium
Lifestyle

‘They come at you’: The grandmothers playing rough at a kids’ sport

17 Jun 06:00 AM

Sponsored: Embrace the senses

sponsored
Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.

Latest from Lifestyle

Premium
How to tackle your to-do list if you struggle with executive functioning

How to tackle your to-do list if you struggle with executive functioning

17 Jun 06:00 PM

NY Times: Conditions like ADHD can make starting and completing tasks feel impossible.

Premium
Josh Emett and the eclair that became an icon

Josh Emett and the eclair that became an icon

Premium
‘They come at you’: The grandmothers playing rough at a kids’ sport

‘They come at you’: The grandmothers playing rough at a kids’ sport

17 Jun 06:00 AM
How often you should be cleaning your toilet, according to experts

How often you should be cleaning your toilet, according to experts

17 Jun 12:12 AM
Help for those helping hardest-hit
sponsored

Help for those helping hardest-hit

NZ Herald
  • About NZ Herald
  • Meet the journalists
  • Newsletters
  • Classifieds
  • Help & support
  • Contact us
  • House rules
  • Privacy Policy
  • Terms of use
  • Competition terms & conditions
  • Our use of AI
Subscriber Services
  • NZ Herald e-editions
  • Daily puzzles & quizzes
  • Manage your digital subscription
  • Manage your print subscription
  • Subscribe to the NZ Herald newspaper
  • Subscribe to Herald Premium
  • Gift a subscription
  • Subscriber FAQs
  • Subscription terms & conditions
  • Promotions and subscriber benefits
NZME Network
  • The New Zealand Herald
  • The Northland Age
  • The Northern Advocate
  • Waikato Herald
  • Bay of Plenty Times
  • Rotorua Daily Post
  • Hawke's Bay Today
  • Whanganui Chronicle
  • Viva
  • NZ Listener
  • Newstalk ZB
  • BusinessDesk
  • OneRoof
  • Driven Car Guide
  • iHeart Radio
  • Restaurant Hub
NZME
  • About NZME
  • NZME careers
  • Advertise with NZME
  • Digital self-service advertising
  • Book your classified ad
  • Photo sales
  • NZME Events
  • © Copyright 2025 NZME Publishing Limited
TOP