NZ Herald
  • Home
  • Latest news
  • Herald NOW
  • Video
  • New Zealand
  • Sport
  • World
  • Business
  • Entertainment
  • Podcasts
  • Quizzes
  • Opinion
  • Lifestyle
  • Travel
  • Viva
  • Weather

Subscriptions

  • Herald Premium
  • Viva Premium
  • The Listener
  • BusinessDesk

Sections

  • Latest news
  • New Zealand
    • All New Zealand
    • Crime
    • Politics
    • Education
    • Open Justice
    • Scam Update
  • Herald NOW
  • On The Up
  • World
    • All World
    • Australia
    • Asia
    • UK
    • United States
    • Middle East
    • Europe
    • Pacific
  • Business
    • All Business
    • MarketsSharesCurrencyCommoditiesStock TakesCrypto
    • Markets with Madison
    • Media Insider
    • Business analysis
    • Personal financeKiwiSaverInterest ratesTaxInvestment
    • EconomyInflationGDPOfficial cash rateEmployment
    • Small business
    • Business reportsMood of the BoardroomProject AucklandSustainable business and financeCapital markets reportAgribusiness reportInfrastructure reportDynamic business
    • Deloitte Top 200 Awards
    • CompaniesAged CareAgribusinessAirlinesBanking and financeConstructionEnergyFreight and logisticsHealthcareManufacturingMedia and MarketingRetailTelecommunicationsTourism
  • Opinion
    • All Opinion
    • Analysis
    • Editorials
    • Business analysis
    • Premium opinion
    • Letters to the editor
  • Politics
  • Sport
    • All Sport
    • OlympicsParalympics
    • RugbySuper RugbyNPCAll BlacksBlack FernsRugby sevensSchool rugby
    • CricketBlack CapsWhite Ferns
    • Racing
    • NetballSilver Ferns
    • LeagueWarriorsNRL
    • FootballWellington PhoenixAuckland FCAll WhitesFootball FernsEnglish Premier League
    • GolfNZ Open
    • MotorsportFormula 1
    • Boxing
    • UFC
    • BasketballNBABreakersTall BlacksTall Ferns
    • Tennis
    • Cycling
    • Athletics
    • SailingAmerica's CupSailGP
    • Rowing
  • Lifestyle
    • All Lifestyle
    • Viva - Food, fashion & beauty
    • Society Insider
    • Royals
    • Sex & relationships
    • Food & drinkRecipesRecipe collectionsRestaurant reviewsRestaurant bookings
    • Health & wellbeing
    • Fashion & beauty
    • Pets & animals
    • The Selection - Shop the trendsShop fashionShop beautyShop entertainmentShop giftsShop home & living
    • Milford's Investing Place
  • Entertainment
    • All Entertainment
    • TV
    • MoviesMovie reviews
    • MusicMusic reviews
    • BooksBook reviews
    • Culture
    • ReviewsBook reviewsMovie reviewsMusic reviewsRestaurant reviews
  • Travel
    • All Travel
    • News
    • New ZealandNorthlandAucklandWellingtonCanterburyOtago / QueenstownNelson-TasmanBest NZ beaches
    • International travelAustraliaPacific IslandsEuropeUKUSAAfricaAsia
    • Rail holidays
    • Cruise holidays
    • Ski holidays
    • Luxury travel
    • Adventure travel
  • Kāhu Māori news
  • Environment
    • All Environment
    • Our Green Future
  • Talanoa Pacific news
  • Property
    • All Property
    • Property Insider
    • Interest rates tracker
    • Residential property listings
    • Commercial property listings
  • Health
  • Technology
    • All Technology
    • AI
    • Social media
  • Rural
    • All Rural
    • Dairy farming
    • Sheep & beef farming
    • Horticulture
    • Animal health
    • Rural business
    • Rural life
    • Rural technology
    • Opinion
    • Audio & podcasts
  • Weather forecasts
    • All Weather forecasts
    • Kaitaia
    • Whangārei
    • Dargaville
    • Auckland
    • Thames
    • Tauranga
    • Hamilton
    • Whakatāne
    • Rotorua
    • Tokoroa
    • Te Kuiti
    • Taumaranui
    • Taupō
    • Gisborne
    • New Plymouth
    • Napier
    • Hastings
    • Dannevirke
    • Whanganui
    • Palmerston North
    • Levin
    • Paraparaumu
    • Masterton
    • Wellington
    • Motueka
    • Nelson
    • Blenheim
    • Westport
    • Reefton
    • Kaikōura
    • Greymouth
    • Hokitika
    • Christchurch
    • Ashburton
    • Timaru
    • Wānaka
    • Oamaru
    • Queenstown
    • Dunedin
    • Gore
    • Invercargill
  • Meet the journalists
  • Promotions & competitions
  • OneRoof property listings
  • Driven car news

Puzzles & Quizzes

  • Puzzles
    • All Puzzles
    • Sudoku
    • Code Cracker
    • Crosswords
    • Cryptic crossword
    • Wordsearch
  • Quizzes
    • All Quizzes
    • Morning quiz
    • Afternoon quiz
    • Sports quiz

Regions

  • Northland
    • All Northland
    • Far North
    • Kaitaia
    • Kerikeri
    • Kaikohe
    • Bay of Islands
    • Whangarei
    • Dargaville
    • Kaipara
    • Mangawhai
  • Auckland
  • Waikato
    • All Waikato
    • Hamilton
    • Coromandel & Hauraki
    • Matamata & Piako
    • Cambridge
    • Te Awamutu
    • Tokoroa & South Waikato
    • Taupō & Tūrangi
  • Bay of Plenty
    • All Bay of Plenty
    • Katikati
    • Tauranga
    • Mount Maunganui
    • Pāpāmoa
    • Te Puke
    • Whakatāne
  • Rotorua
  • Hawke's Bay
    • All Hawke's Bay
    • Napier
    • Hastings
    • Havelock North
    • Central Hawke's Bay
    • Wairoa
  • Taranaki
    • All Taranaki
    • Stratford
    • New Plymouth
    • Hāwera
  • Manawatū - Whanganui
    • All Manawatū - Whanganui
    • Whanganui
    • Palmerston North
    • Manawatū
    • Tararua
    • Horowhenua
  • Wellington
    • All Wellington
    • Kapiti
    • Wairarapa
    • Upper Hutt
    • Lower Hutt
  • Nelson & Tasman
    • All Nelson & Tasman
    • Motueka
    • Nelson
    • Tasman
  • Marlborough
  • West Coast
  • Canterbury
    • All Canterbury
    • Kaikōura
    • Christchurch
    • Ashburton
    • Timaru
  • Otago
    • All Otago
    • Oamaru
    • Dunedin
    • Balclutha
    • Alexandra
    • Queenstown
    • Wanaka
  • Southland
    • All Southland
    • Invercargill
    • Gore
    • Stewart Island
  • Gisborne

Media

  • Video
    • All Video
    • NZ news video
    • Herald NOW
    • Business news video
    • Politics news video
    • Sport video
    • World news video
    • Lifestyle video
    • Entertainment video
    • Travel video
    • Markets with Madison
    • Kea Kids news
  • Podcasts
    • All Podcasts
    • The Front Page
    • On the Tiles
    • Ask me Anything
    • The Little Things
  • Cartoons
  • Photo galleries
  • Today's Paper - E-editions
  • Photo sales
  • Classifieds

NZME Network

  • Advertise with NZME
  • OneRoof
  • Driven Car Guide
  • BusinessDesk
  • Newstalk ZB
  • Sunlive
  • ZM
  • The Hits
  • Coast
  • Radio Hauraki
  • The Alternative Commentary Collective
  • Gold
  • Flava
  • iHeart Radio
  • Hokonui
  • Radio Wanaka
  • iHeartCountry New Zealand
  • Restaurant Hub
  • NZME Events

SubscribeSign In
Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.
Home / Lifestyle

Shelley Bridgeman: Do you respond to misdirected texts?

Shelley Bridgeman
By Shelley Bridgeman
Herald online·
2 Jul, 2012 02:50 AM4 mins to read

Subscribe to listen

Access to Herald Premium articles require a Premium subscription. Subscribe now to listen.
Already a subscriber?  Sign in here

Listening to articles is free for open-access content—explore other articles or learn more about text-to-speech.
‌
Save

    Share this article

Photo / Thinkstock

Photo / Thinkstock

Shelley Bridgeman
Opinion by Shelley Bridgeman
Shelley Bridgeman is a columnist for Lifestyle at The New Zealand Herald.
Learn more

On Saturday I received a very nicely worded, but poorly punctuated, text that read: "Hi, I did a builders inspection at [a particular street] yesterday could you confirm if there is a sump pump at the entrance of the garage thanks. It's not an area of concern just something my client needs to be aware of for pump upkeep ... Regards."

An apostrophe and some full-stops may have been missing in action but the missive reeked of professionalism. The text was signed off with a full name, position, freephone number, email address and website address. I did the decent thing and replied: "Wrong number. Not us!"

Yet I must confess I'm not always so quick to alert the sender to a wrongly addressed text. When they're anonymous I opt to not reply. Similarly, I deliver the silent treatment when the language used bears only a vague resemblance to any official language yet recorded.

I didn't reply to: "Hay Danielle its lika. Wat times practz?" Firstly, I was not Danielle; secondly, I'm not acquainted with a "lika". And I didn't reply when another unknown person sent me the following text late at night on New Year's Eve: "hae, wea r use??"

Upon reflection I should have sent a friendly "Wrong number!" to this person. But I wasn't to know he or she would continue to use my number and send me five increasingly detailed texts over the next week. One said: "Hello, uncle ... aunty and thems car broke down in Papatoetoe ..." Another said: "Hey, guys, uh just wntd 2 let use knw dat if you wanna ring nd tlk 2 nana, ring my numbr. Coz my mums phns broken! xx."

Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.
Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.

By this stage I was feeling like I almost knew this person. He or she clearly valued close family relationships; an uncle, an aunt, a grandmother and a mother all starred in this array of text messages. And these people were having an unlucky run; in the space of four days they'd had a broken car and a broken phone.

And here I was studiously ignoring these texts and possibly adding to their catalogue of problems. The two kisses at the end only amplified the guilt I was now experiencing. But I was in too deep. How could I suddenly tell them after several texts that they'd been sending them to the wrong number? That would be difficult to explain. So I stood my ground and the texts finally stopped arriving.

In the absence of a rulebook on how to handle misdirected texts we must take each case on its merits and make up our own minds as to whether or not to reply. After my recent experience I think I'll be responding to all anonymous texts in future so as not to prolong the confusion at the other end.

Yet my failure to respond to the series of five texts ultimately gave me a precious peep into someone else's life. Perhaps it's the technological equivalent of looking into brightly lit rooms with undrawn curtains as you drive by at night; I've always found such uninvited and fleeting glimpses into other people's homes to be tantalisingly seductive - and, in a way, these texts were too. Plus now I wonder if the "aunty" reference provided me with a private preview of the distinctive lingo used on reality show The GC.

What's your experience with misdirected texts? Should they always be responded to? Do you think it was a bit mean to not put that repeat text sender out of his or her misery? Have you had a similar experience and how did you handle it? Have you ever misdirected a text with a memorable outcome?

Discover more

Opinion

Shelley Bridgeman: The role of women is 'diminished and trivialised'

26 Feb 11:56 PM
Opinion

Shelley Bridgeman: Classy v trashy, expensive v cheap

11 Mar 09:13 PM
Opinion

Shelley Bridgeman: What's the point of segregated bathrooms?

11 Apr 09:59 PM
Opinion

Shelley Bridgeman: Awash in a veritable sea of porn

04 Jun 09:14 PM
Save

    Share this article

Latest from Lifestyle

Lifestyle

'Speechless': Woman's lost engagement ring miraculously found with stranger's help

Lifestyle

Boss’ insane text to gym members about ‘young women’ rule

Lifestyle

King Charles' unprecedented Trump move


Sponsored

Sponsored: Why heat pumps make winter cheaper

Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.

Latest from Lifestyle

'Speechless': Woman's lost engagement ring miraculously found with stranger's help
Lifestyle

'Speechless': Woman's lost engagement ring miraculously found with stranger's help

Diana lost her treasured ring while collecting water samples in the Waiuku mudflats.

14 Jul 07:00 AM
Boss’ insane text to gym members about ‘young women’ rule
Lifestyle

Boss’ insane text to gym members about ‘young women’ rule

14 Jul 02:04 AM
King Charles' unprecedented Trump move
Lifestyle

King Charles' unprecedented Trump move

14 Jul 01:14 AM


Sponsored: Why heat pumps make winter cheaper
Sponsored

Sponsored: Why heat pumps make winter cheaper

01 Jul 04:58 PM
NZ Herald
  • About NZ Herald
  • Meet the journalists
  • Newsletters
  • Classifieds
  • Help & support
  • Contact us
  • House rules
  • Privacy Policy
  • Terms of use
  • Competition terms & conditions
  • Our use of AI
Subscriber Services
  • NZ Herald e-editions
  • Daily puzzles & quizzes
  • Manage your digital subscription
  • Manage your print subscription
  • Subscribe to the NZ Herald newspaper
  • Subscribe to Herald Premium
  • Gift a subscription
  • Subscriber FAQs
  • Subscription terms & conditions
  • Promotions and subscriber benefits
NZME Network
  • The New Zealand Herald
  • The Northland Age
  • The Northern Advocate
  • Waikato Herald
  • Bay of Plenty Times
  • Rotorua Daily Post
  • Hawke's Bay Today
  • Whanganui Chronicle
  • Viva
  • NZ Listener
  • Newstalk ZB
  • BusinessDesk
  • OneRoof
  • Driven Car Guide
  • iHeart Radio
  • Restaurant Hub
NZME
  • About NZME
  • NZME careers
  • Advertise with NZME
  • Digital self-service advertising
  • Book your classified ad
  • Photo sales
  • NZME Events
  • © Copyright 2025 NZME Publishing Limited
TOP