'Rude' wedding invitation with guest waiting list horrifies Twitter

A couple has come up with a unique way of creating the guest list for their wedding but their approach has not gone down well. Photo / 123rf

In the weird and wonderful world of weddings it can sometimes seem like we've seen it all.

But a wedding invite listing guests in groups with some on a waiting list has been labelled "tacky" and "rude".

UK writer Mary von Aue shared a photo of the unusual letter on Twitter, writing that it had been "included in an actual wedding invitation".

The letter told friends and family that because of "capacity restrictions" the bride and groom had been "forced to split our guests into groups".

Group A was instructed to "please RSVP as soon as possible" as "we will be able to extend any vacant seats to additional guests".

This was included in an actual wedding invitation. pic.twitter.com/qidA7SO6CJ

— Sage Against the Machine (@von_owie) July 23, 2020

Groups B and C were more of a reserve team, with guests in these groups not actually able to attend the wedding unless someone in group A made a spot available.

"Please keep a close watch on our wedding website for notice that we have space available," the invite instructed.

But if guests in groups B and C already knew they couldn't attend they were told "it is helpful that you decline via the RSVP function on our website".

The bride and groom also said they "encourage our guests to hire a babysitter" and "leave your children at home".

"As much as we love your kids, we are doing our best to make space for all of the guests we can," the letter explained.

"We also ask for our single guests to forgo their plus one if possible."

The invite was retweeted more than 1400 times, with some describing it as "tacky" and "rude".

I don't care what anyone else here says, you don't invite more than the capacity of the venue, and asking singles and parents to forgo their dates/kids is tacky. If you don't want +1s or kids, you don't invite anyone that has them. This isn't rocket science.

— Craig Pilgram (@cppilgram) July 25, 2020

It's not good planning, it's terrible hosting. Every wedding has a preference list, and most are quietly grouped like this, but you don't send it out to guests. Are they supposed to queue outside your house and take a ticket?? "Congratulations, you are our 79th favourite person"

— Kate (@ThisIsKateL) July 25, 2020

hilarious that it seems like groups b & c are identical, but to be c is just slightly more degrading

— Sam Yellowhorse Kesler (@samkeslr) July 23, 2020

hilarious that it seems like groups b & c are identical, but to be c is just slightly more degrading

— Sam Yellowhorse Kesler (@samkeslr) July 23, 2020

However some said the invite's grouping of guests onto waiting lists and limiting plus ones was understandable, given social distancing measures meant couples could only invite a certain amount of people.

Is this because of COVID? A friend is battling with her venue because they informed her after lockdown that capacity would now be reduced by half for her October wedding, everyone required to wear masks, and she couldn't cancel or postpone until 2021 or she'd lose her deposit.

— Megan McG🌹 (@MeganMcGilloway) July 24, 2020

So? If it's a current wedding invitation they are using best practices during a global pandemic.

— Nellie R (@emtfr) July 26, 2020

In the UK, couples are allowed to have up to 30 people attend their wedding and will be able to have 30 people at the reception from August 1.

Weddings also have to be "Covid-secure" meaning social distancing between different households must be followed, group singing and playing of instruments are strongly discouraged and ceremonies should be kept as short as possible.

In Australia restrictions around weddings and the number of guests vary from state and territory, with all regions except for locked-down Melbourne and Mitchell Shire able to have ceremonies and receptions.