NZ Herald
  • Home
  • Latest news
  • Herald NOW
  • Video
  • New Zealand
  • Sport
  • World
  • Business
  • Entertainment
  • Podcasts
  • Quizzes
  • Opinion
  • Lifestyle
  • Travel
  • Viva
  • Weather

Subscriptions

  • Herald Premium
  • Viva Premium
  • The Listener
  • BusinessDesk

Sections

  • Latest news
  • New Zealand
    • All New Zealand
    • Crime
    • Politics
    • Education
    • Open Justice
    • Scam Update
  • Herald NOW
  • On The Up
  • World
    • All World
    • Australia
    • Asia
    • UK
    • United States
    • Middle East
    • Europe
    • Pacific
  • Business
    • All Business
    • MarketsSharesCurrencyCommoditiesStock TakesCrypto
    • Markets with Madison
    • Media Insider
    • Business analysis
    • Personal financeKiwiSaverInterest ratesTaxInvestment
    • EconomyInflationGDPOfficial cash rateEmployment
    • Small business
    • Business reportsMood of the BoardroomProject AucklandSustainable business and financeCapital markets reportAgribusiness reportInfrastructure reportDynamic business
    • Deloitte Top 200 Awards
    • CompaniesAged CareAgribusinessAirlinesBanking and financeConstructionEnergyFreight and logisticsHealthcareManufacturingMedia and MarketingRetailTelecommunicationsTourism
  • Opinion
    • All Opinion
    • Analysis
    • Editorials
    • Business analysis
    • Premium opinion
    • Letters to the editor
  • Politics
  • Sport
    • All Sport
    • OlympicsParalympics
    • RugbySuper RugbyNPCAll BlacksBlack FernsRugby sevensSchool rugby
    • CricketBlack CapsWhite Ferns
    • Racing
    • NetballSilver Ferns
    • LeagueWarriorsNRL
    • FootballWellington PhoenixAuckland FCAll WhitesFootball FernsEnglish Premier League
    • GolfNZ Open
    • MotorsportFormula 1
    • Boxing
    • UFC
    • BasketballNBABreakersTall BlacksTall Ferns
    • Tennis
    • Cycling
    • Athletics
    • SailingAmerica's CupSailGP
    • Rowing
  • Lifestyle
    • All Lifestyle
    • Viva - Food, fashion & beauty
    • Society Insider
    • Royals
    • Sex & relationships
    • Food & drinkRecipesRecipe collectionsRestaurant reviewsRestaurant bookings
    • Health & wellbeing
    • Fashion & beauty
    • Pets & animals
    • The Selection - Shop the trendsShop fashionShop beautyShop entertainmentShop giftsShop home & living
    • Milford's Investing Place
  • Entertainment
    • All Entertainment
    • TV
    • MoviesMovie reviews
    • MusicMusic reviews
    • BooksBook reviews
    • Culture
    • ReviewsBook reviewsMovie reviewsMusic reviewsRestaurant reviews
  • Travel
    • All Travel
    • News
    • New ZealandNorthlandAucklandWellingtonCanterburyOtago / QueenstownNelson-TasmanBest NZ beaches
    • International travelAustraliaPacific IslandsEuropeUKUSAAfricaAsia
    • Rail holidays
    • Cruise holidays
    • Ski holidays
    • Luxury travel
    • Adventure travel
  • Kāhu Māori news
  • Environment
    • All Environment
    • Our Green Future
  • Talanoa Pacific news
  • Property
    • All Property
    • Property Insider
    • Interest rates tracker
    • Residential property listings
    • Commercial property listings
  • Health
  • Technology
    • All Technology
    • AI
    • Social media
  • Rural
    • All Rural
    • Dairy farming
    • Sheep & beef farming
    • Horticulture
    • Animal health
    • Rural business
    • Rural life
    • Rural technology
    • Opinion
    • Audio & podcasts
  • Weather forecasts
    • All Weather forecasts
    • Kaitaia
    • Whangārei
    • Dargaville
    • Auckland
    • Thames
    • Tauranga
    • Hamilton
    • Whakatāne
    • Rotorua
    • Tokoroa
    • Te Kuiti
    • Taumaranui
    • Taupō
    • Gisborne
    • New Plymouth
    • Napier
    • Hastings
    • Dannevirke
    • Whanganui
    • Palmerston North
    • Levin
    • Paraparaumu
    • Masterton
    • Wellington
    • Motueka
    • Nelson
    • Blenheim
    • Westport
    • Reefton
    • Kaikōura
    • Greymouth
    • Hokitika
    • Christchurch
    • Ashburton
    • Timaru
    • Wānaka
    • Oamaru
    • Queenstown
    • Dunedin
    • Gore
    • Invercargill
  • Meet the journalists
  • Promotions & competitions
  • OneRoof property listings
  • Driven car news

Puzzles & Quizzes

  • Puzzles
    • All Puzzles
    • Sudoku
    • Code Cracker
    • Crosswords
    • Cryptic crossword
    • Wordsearch
  • Quizzes
    • All Quizzes
    • Morning quiz
    • Afternoon quiz
    • Sports quiz

Regions

  • Northland
    • All Northland
    • Far North
    • Kaitaia
    • Kerikeri
    • Kaikohe
    • Bay of Islands
    • Whangarei
    • Dargaville
    • Kaipara
    • Mangawhai
  • Auckland
  • Waikato
    • All Waikato
    • Hamilton
    • Coromandel & Hauraki
    • Matamata & Piako
    • Cambridge
    • Te Awamutu
    • Tokoroa & South Waikato
    • Taupō & Tūrangi
  • Bay of Plenty
    • All Bay of Plenty
    • Katikati
    • Tauranga
    • Mount Maunganui
    • Pāpāmoa
    • Te Puke
    • Whakatāne
  • Rotorua
  • Hawke's Bay
    • All Hawke's Bay
    • Napier
    • Hastings
    • Havelock North
    • Central Hawke's Bay
    • Wairoa
  • Taranaki
    • All Taranaki
    • Stratford
    • New Plymouth
    • Hāwera
  • Manawatū - Whanganui
    • All Manawatū - Whanganui
    • Whanganui
    • Palmerston North
    • Manawatū
    • Tararua
    • Horowhenua
  • Wellington
    • All Wellington
    • Kapiti
    • Wairarapa
    • Upper Hutt
    • Lower Hutt
  • Nelson & Tasman
    • All Nelson & Tasman
    • Motueka
    • Nelson
    • Tasman
  • Marlborough
  • West Coast
  • Canterbury
    • All Canterbury
    • Kaikōura
    • Christchurch
    • Ashburton
    • Timaru
  • Otago
    • All Otago
    • Oamaru
    • Dunedin
    • Balclutha
    • Alexandra
    • Queenstown
    • Wanaka
  • Southland
    • All Southland
    • Invercargill
    • Gore
    • Stewart Island
  • Gisborne

Media

  • Video
    • All Video
    • NZ news video
    • Herald NOW
    • Business news video
    • Politics news video
    • Sport video
    • World news video
    • Lifestyle video
    • Entertainment video
    • Travel video
    • Markets with Madison
    • Kea Kids news
  • Podcasts
    • All Podcasts
    • The Front Page
    • On the Tiles
    • Ask me Anything
    • The Little Things
  • Cartoons
  • Photo galleries
  • Today's Paper - E-editions
  • Photo sales
  • Classifieds

NZME Network

  • Advertise with NZME
  • OneRoof
  • Driven Car Guide
  • BusinessDesk
  • Newstalk ZB
  • Sunlive
  • ZM
  • The Hits
  • Coast
  • Radio Hauraki
  • The Alternative Commentary Collective
  • Gold
  • Flava
  • iHeart Radio
  • Hokonui
  • Radio Wanaka
  • iHeartCountry New Zealand
  • Restaurant Hub
  • NZME Events

SubscribeSign In
Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.
Home / Lifestyle

Paul Little: Men will be boys forever

By Paul Little
Herald on Sunday·
12 Sep, 2015 10:55 PM3 mins to read

Subscribe to listen

Access to Herald Premium articles require a Premium subscription. Subscribe now to listen.
Already a subscriber?  Sign in here

Listening to articles is free for open-access content—explore other articles or learn more about text-to-speech.
‌
Save

    Share this article

Marketing to men seldom emphasises brand values of maturity, common sense and stability. Instead, they are invited to attend product shows such as Big Boys Toys.

Marketing to men seldom emphasises brand values of maturity, common sense and stability. Instead, they are invited to attend product shows such as Big Boys Toys.

Opinion by Paul LittleLearn more

I recently noticed a child standing in a laundromat doorway. He was wearing brightly coloured trainers, a T-shirt with a heavy metal band print, baggy shorts, various coloured threads tied around his wrist. He was holding a skateboard in one hand and playing a game on his phone with the other.

It didn't take long to work out what was wrong with what I was looking at - the child was a man of at least 40.

Males have stopped growing up. There is a generation of men who are not just acting like children, they have remained children. And society has encouraged them to do so.

Many men spend a lot of time making up for what they think they missed out on when they were young. If, for instance, they didn't have a bike as a boy you will guarantee they will be treating themselves to the 2015 Giant Reign advanced 27.5 0 Team Large with the Avid Guides brakes and the Rockshox Reverb Stealth dropper seat post, not to mention the most repellent outfit to wear when riding it.

The deprivation mentality is a strong one, and encouraging buyers to yield to it is a key strategy of consumerism.

Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.
Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.

Parents are also to blame. Too many let their children take up valuable space for years past their expulsion date because it's easier than telling them to grow up and move out.

More than one set of parents has moved house into a dwelling that does not have enough space for adult children to free themselves from the burden of perpetual caregiving.

Economics plays a part, too. If someone can't afford to leave the family home to set up one of their own, he or she is trapped in an environment where they have always been treated like a child.

Consequently, serious long-term relationships are not entered into until later in life and a cycle of immaturity is established, because trying to have a serious relationship used to be an effective way to make yourself grow up.

Marketing to men seldom emphasises brand values of maturity, common sense and stability. Instead, they are invited to attend product shows such as Big Boys Toys. And why not? After all, they are big boys and you can never have too many toys, can you?

Discover more

Lifestyle

'Men get job offers, I get propositions'

09 Sep 10:20 PM
Lifestyle

Girls can wear dinosaurs

11 Sep 01:27 AM
World

Justice eludes rape victims

11 Sep 05:00 PM
Entertainment

Caitlyn Jenner removed beard in the '80s

11 Sep 08:00 PM

Television aimed at men glorifies permanent adolescent behaviour, frequently involving groups of grown men - Hamish and Andy, the cast of Top Gear, Jono and Ben - engaging in the sort of pranks and antics you might have expected them to have grown out of. It's worth noting that when Jono and Ben inveigled their way on to Graham Norton's Red Chair, they did so wearing school uniforms.

For entertainment, men have a stream of movies based on comic books in which women feature barely, if at all. They no longer have to confine video game playing to their living rooms but, thanks to smartphones, can carry them everywhere they go and play them whenever they want.

Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.

It is accepted they will dress in garments that present them as pre-pubescent neuters, such as onesies and overalls, as though they are characters in a Maurice Sendak picture book. Many never don a pair of long pants, but wear shorts year-round.

They even eat like children - encouraged to indulge in comfort food and enjoy the wide range of snacks and sweets on offer in the supermarkets. That can't be good for them.

But in general, as a lot of women will tell you, the real problem with men not growing up is that they don't grow up.

Save

    Share this article

Latest from Lifestyle

Premium
Lifestyle

How I learned to stop stressing and just have people over for dinner

19 Jun 06:00 PM
Premium
Talanoa

How a young widow's blog became a beacon of hope for others

19 Jun 05:00 PM
Lifestyle

Auckland cafe to close after 70 years following rates dispute settlement

19 Jun 05:00 PM

Help for those helping hardest-hit

sponsored
Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.

Latest from Lifestyle

Premium
How I learned to stop stressing and just have people over for dinner

How I learned to stop stressing and just have people over for dinner

19 Jun 06:00 PM

Washington Post: The mindset should be - less fuss, more fun with company.

Premium
How a young widow's blog became a beacon of hope for others

How a young widow's blog became a beacon of hope for others

19 Jun 05:00 PM
Auckland cafe to close after 70 years following rates dispute settlement

Auckland cafe to close after 70 years following rates dispute settlement

19 Jun 05:00 PM
Hate skiing? Try these snow-free winter adventures in NZ instead

Hate skiing? Try these snow-free winter adventures in NZ instead

19 Jun 06:00 AM
Inside Leigh Hart’s bonkers quest to hand-deliver a SnackaChangi chip to every Kiwi
sponsored

Inside Leigh Hart’s bonkers quest to hand-deliver a SnackaChangi chip to every Kiwi

NZ Herald
  • About NZ Herald
  • Meet the journalists
  • Newsletters
  • Classifieds
  • Help & support
  • Contact us
  • House rules
  • Privacy Policy
  • Terms of use
  • Competition terms & conditions
  • Our use of AI
Subscriber Services
  • NZ Herald e-editions
  • Daily puzzles & quizzes
  • Manage your digital subscription
  • Manage your print subscription
  • Subscribe to the NZ Herald newspaper
  • Subscribe to Herald Premium
  • Gift a subscription
  • Subscriber FAQs
  • Subscription terms & conditions
  • Promotions and subscriber benefits
NZME Network
  • The New Zealand Herald
  • The Northland Age
  • The Northern Advocate
  • Waikato Herald
  • Bay of Plenty Times
  • Rotorua Daily Post
  • Hawke's Bay Today
  • Whanganui Chronicle
  • Viva
  • NZ Listener
  • Newstalk ZB
  • BusinessDesk
  • OneRoof
  • Driven Car Guide
  • iHeart Radio
  • Restaurant Hub
NZME
  • About NZME
  • NZME careers
  • Advertise with NZME
  • Digital self-service advertising
  • Book your classified ad
  • Photo sales
  • NZME Events
  • © Copyright 2025 NZME Publishing Limited
TOP