According to Linnea Dunne, author of Good Mornings, a book about reclaiming the morning as "me time" through meditation, exercise and self-care: "In a world of 'always on', the commitment to being with ourselves, fully, if only for a short moment every morning, helps us take notice of our inner compass."
The history
In 2012 a man called Hal Elrod published a book called The Miracle Morning, which people went bonkers for.
Elrod claimed we could "level-up" our lives by waking before 8am and implementing his "six practices": silence, affirmations, positive visualisation, exercise, reading, and writing.
Also, I don't know about you but there are three people I trust implicitly: Jennifer Aniston, Oprah and Barack Obama. So, when I heard these beautiful zillionaires all get up before the sun, I was sold.
The science
According to science, if you're early to bed and early to rise, your mental health could benefit too.
A study published in the Journal of Psychiatric Research found those who consider themselves to be late risers are more likely to become depressed than those who wake up early each day.
And in 2008, Harvard biologist Christoph Randler discovered early risers are more proactive than their slothy peers. He found early bird nerds more likely to agree with statements such as "I spend time identifying long-range goals for myself" and "I feel in charge of making things happen."
The reality
This is my current morning routine: Alarm goes off at 7am. I peel open one beady little rat eye and check my phone for texts from ex-boyfriends, saying something like, "Sinead, you're the best thing that ever happened to me. I was a fool to let you go. I'll do anything to win you back."
Once I've confirmed, just like every other day, I have zero of these texts, I lie in bed checking my Instagram stories and wondering - if my work crush viewed my story does that mean he's in love with me?
By now it's 7.30am. I skulk into the shower, emerge at approximately 7:52am and have eight minutes to transform myself from a baked potato to a lady.
Last Monday, however, I decided to start my new Gwyneth-esque, Gokotta life. I get up at 6am, ready to Eat Pray Love myself sick.
Dunne's book has plenty of suggested rituals. Journalling is one of them. While it's a lovely idea, I literally write for a living - eight hours a day - so can't be bothered doing extra writing no one will pay me for, thanks though.
Jogging is another suggestion. I walk to work and back so I decide it's okay for me to skip this (also, I just really don't want to jog).
Another idea is to sit in your garden and listen to the birds. This sounds delightful but I live in a Ponsonby townhouse. Thank you, next.
I settle on meditation, a gratitude app and stretching because these seem like they'll require the least effort. Plus they can all be done in the comfort of my bedroom while wearing my dressing gown.
Using my subscription to the app "Calm" - gifted to me by a Tinder date because I seemed "strung out" (pardon?) - I start with a 15 minute meditation.
I follow this up with a 10-minute guided stretching class using the same app, to really get this Tinder fling's money's worth.
To finish, I download the Gratitude365 app. Each day of the year it forces you to churn out three things you're grateful for. This was a harrowing grim experience. Thirty minutes later I had just two things: the episode of Big Little Lies I'd watched the evening before and my UberEats dinner.
Then I slipped into an existential crisis about how I'm an ungrateful toad and my life is empty beyond TV shows and deliverable fast food.
The verdict
I rinsed and repeated this routine for the next few days. Aside from one day where I accidentally overslept, I stuck at it. And I did eventually feel better for it.
The only downside was because I was awake for more hours in the day I was tired and ate like a total gutso.
However, I plan to try and keep up my Gokotta-ing. It does feel quite good and self-caring. And, like going to the gym in the morning, there's no better feeling than sauntering into the office and feeling superior to your peers because you did some fancy wholesome stuff before work.
