KEY POINTS:
Never mind the rumbling debate over her imminent engagement, never mind whether or not she'll ultimately become Queen; the single truly significant issue regarding Prince William's girlfriend Kate Middleton is this: is she a style icon? Or not?
Is Kate Middleton, as certain cultural commentators have already suggested, destined to trump the previously all-powerful Kate Moss in the 2007 style stakes? Will we all be frantically attempting to recreate Middleton Chic in three months' time?
No, actually. We won't. Kate Middleton is not a style icon. Not yet, at least. She has potential. Good basic material, a good bod and great skin. But it's early days. Kate is unformed, sartorially speaking. Remember Diana's wardrobe, in the early stages of her engagement to Charles?
Nondescript-going-on-really-not-very-good-at-all? Chiffon blouses with pussy-bows and long pleated woollen skirts? That's where Kate's at. Not literally - substitute the pussy-bow blouses for baby blue cashmere knits (chosen by her mother, probably, who thinks they bring out her eyes) and the woollen skirts for jeans that are ever-so-slightly the wrong shade of denim, and the wrong cut - but she certainly has yet to be moulded into a glossed-up, sharp-edged, finished fash product.
She will be. Style icons aren't born, they're made, and Middleton will be made. Just as one-time Vogue deputy editor Anna Harvey took Diana under her wing in the mid-80s and encouraged her to ditch the Laura Ashley flounces in favour of cocktail dresses and signature crisp white shirts, someone professionally chic will make Middleton over. My money's on Sara Buys, the fashion features editor of Harper's Bazaar - a woman who is both ineffably cool and also the wife of Tom Parker Bowles (the son of William's step-mother the Duchess of Cornwall), which makes them practically related already.
Kate will need to find "her" hairdresser. Middleton hasn't got a hairstyle yet - nothing distinct enough to be named a "Kate", and then copied by the future Middleton-aspiring masses, anyway. But someone - probably Josh (for colour) and Belle (for cut), owner/directors of London destination hair salon Real - will do for her what celebrity hairdresser Sam McKnight did for Diana and whip her up a signature "do". She'll gravitate towards Real - because a) it's fashionable, but not scarily so, and b) it's located just off the King's Road in southwest London, Middleton's spiritual home.
Queen of the international cosmetics scene Laura Mercier will work on her makeup - which will be a slightly heightened, glossed-up variation on her signature English rosiness, something that will "play in LA". Mercier will probably then name a lipstick after Kate, as she did once for Madonna.
And Middleton will start visiting The Luzmon off High St Kensington, where she'll develop the kind of shoulder and upper arm definition that will complement an LBD perfectly, thanks to The Luzmon's super-hot work-out system which shoots electrical frequencies through your muscles.
As yet, however, Middleton does not qualify as a style icon. Which is not to say she doesn't have A Look. She does. I once named it Lamb Dressed as Mutton, but now I think I prefer Wifely Chic - whatever, it's the dernier cri in unthreatening, cheerful, prim and demure. It's sensible.
It matches. It's always climate appropriate. It's always appropriate, full stop.
Relatively, Middleton's style seems new and fresh. In fact, it's little more than an update on posh-English-girl-casual-chic. Kate's palate is aubergine and moss greens, though she'll do splashes of red for a giggle; and chocolate brown is her neutral, her beige. Her silhouettes are neat and sleek, but never suggestive. Her skirts never sneak far above her knee - unless she's wearing nice, opaque Wolford tights and mid-heeled suede boots by Boden. Her tops rarely meander down to expose decollete below her clavicle.
Her favourite shop and new employer is Jigsaw - she hasn't yet graduated up to designer and, right now, she's too sensible to imagine how one could ever spend that kind of wedge on frocks.
She doesn't mind investing in accessories, however. She likes handbags by Longchamp (an understated alternative to the ultra-fashionable Mulberry), and she likes her pearls to be perfect, even strands. She wears cowboy boots under jeans, just like she did when she was at uni.
Of course, while Middleton's wardrobe is not capable of bestowing fashion icon status, it is the last word in pre-engagement wear. It says: "I'm not vain, or vulnerable to the frantically vacillating whims of fashion, so marry me!" It says: "I'm not extravagant, vulgar or feckless, so marry me!" And it says: "I may not be wearing a ring, but I am definitely spoken for!"
As a friend of mine reminded me: "No single woman in her right mind would ever dress like that. It's hardly going to get you laid, is it?"
The making of fashion queens
Kate
Fashion guru: Tipped to be Sara Buys, the fashion features editor of Harper's Bazaar
Hairdresser: Tipped to be Josh and Belle, owners of London hair salon Real
Fitness: The Luzmon, London
Early fashion mistake: Baby blue cashmere knits and woollen skirts and jeans that are ever-so-slightly the wrong shade of denim
Diana
Fashion guru: Former Vogue deputy editor Anna Harvey
Hairdresser: Sam McKnight
Fitness: LA Gym, London
Early fashion mistake: Chiffon blouses with pussy-bows and long pleated woollen skirts
* Polly Vernon is deputy editor of Observer Woman Magazine.
- OBSERVER
