Author: Andy Griffiths
Illustrator: Terry Denton
Publisher: Macmillan, $13.95
Age Group: 9-11 years
So much for glasses making you look more intelligent. I ended up looking stupider than ever.
But I'll fix that.
This Band-Aid has to go.
And today is the day.
I can't put it off any longer.
I grit my teeth.
I clench my jaw.
I take a
deep breath.
This is it.
Stinging.
Burning.
Agony.
More pure agony.
And I haven't even started yet.
Just thinking about it is painful.
What if my skin comes off with it?
And what if I just bleed and bleed and bleed, and the whole bathroom fills up with blood?
And what if I'm just treading blood and then my mum opens the door and all the blood surges out of the room like a tidal wave and picks Mum up as well as me and we go sailing off down the street and Mum screams," What's happening?' and I'll say,"I just peeled my Band-Aid off, that's all,' and she'll say,"What? You peeled your Band-Aid off? Do you think I'm made of Band-aids? Do you think Band-Aids grown on trees? Do you think Band-aids are handed out free on street corners?' and I'll say,"No, but they should be because then I wouldn't have had to wear the same one for six months and none of this would ever have happened!'
But you can go crazy thinking about stuff like this.
Better not to think about it.
I know what I should do.
Stop thinking and just do it.
Fast.
Get it over and done with.
A lot of people prolong the agony by thinking about it too much.
But not me.
When I say I'm going to do something then I do it. I don't just go on and on about it. I do it.
Really.
I really, really do it. Here goes.
I'm going to do it.
Right now.
Starting in a moment.
A moment from right now.
I mean right then.
(continued on page 6 of Just Crazy).
* Next week's book: One hundred and one dalmations by Dodie Smith.
