Basalt restaurant in Howick. Photo / Babiche Martens
Herald rating: * * 1/2
Address: Picton St, Howick
Ph: (09) 533 0081
Open: 7 days, lunch and dinner
Website: www.basalt.co.nz
Cuisine: Brasserie
From the menu: Smoked Chicken Salad $18.50; Snapper and chips $25.50; Raspberry creme brulee tart $9.50
Vegetarian: Lite
Wine: Basic
SCENE 1: A smart suburban brasserie. Locals enjoy an after-work drink at the mezzanine bar. In the restaurant foreground, three pairs of diners make their way to tables near the fire. Left are Debs and Tiffany, 20s, best friends since schooldays; right, Paul and Krishna, business acquaintances, 40-ish,
one local and the other a visitor from overseas; centre, are Jude and Ewan, a middle-aged couple. A waitress approaches them.
Waitress: Something to drink while you're deciding?
Ewan: I'm not familiar with these labels. I'll try Turtle Bay syrah. Jude likes Triplebank pinot gris.
The waitress turns to the next table.
Paul: We'll have a bottle of red. (To Krishna) We always have wine with our meals here. Do you drink wine? Oh. Pity.
Debs and Tiffany have brought cocktails from the bar.
SCENE 2: The waitress returns.
Jude: I'd like the crab cakes from this Wild Food Challenge menu as an entree. But I don't want the beer match. Then the rib eye, medium.
Waitress: The crab cakes are really, like, a main. And it comes with the beer so you'll have to pay for it. I'll see if we can do it as an entrée. (Turns to kitchen). Yes, we can.
Ewan: Terrine and paprika lamb.
Jude (to waitress): Do you think we'll need any sides?
Waitress: Your steak comes with parsnip and cellerack, they're like vegetables, and his has got potatoes and stuff, but if the meals come and you don't like them, you can always get a green salad.
The waitress turns to Paul. He orders inaudibly, ending ...
Paul: ... and wedges. (To Krishna) We always have chips with our meals in New Zealand.
The waitress approaches Debs and Tiffany. Tiffany orders stonegrill steak; Debs fish.
Debs: I want to lose some weight before your wedding. So I look my best in the photos.
Jude (to Ewan): Stonegrill?
Ewan: Speciality here. They bring the meat on a hot volcanic plate and you cook it to your liking at the table.
Jude: I remember that in Hamilton in the 70s. Is it back?
Ewan: It is, here.
SCENE 3: The diners eat and chat.
Waitress: Like some pepper?
Ewan: Is that a pepper grinder or a weapon of mass destruction?
Jude: Speaking of Hamilton in the 70s ...
Paul (to Krishna): Are you vegetarian at home? Oh. Oh well.
Tiffany (to Debs): I just had my first pedicure (takes shoe off, shows toes). Just before my BodyShots session at Sylvia Park. It's a surprise for Craig, I'm going to give him an album before the wedding. There's a lot of meat here. Do you want some? Oh, sorry. Forgot.
Ewan (to Jude): Enjoying your meal?
Jude: The crab cakes were superb. Fresh and juicy, and the coconut and chilli flavours were a nice touch with the salad - seaweed and rocket. The steak's good but it is a lot of meat. I like the veges. Hardly anyone uses celeriac. Or parsnip. Just the sort of thing for winter. Yours?
Ewan: Good, gutsy terrine, strong pork flavour. Not sure if the French would put sweet chilli sauce over theirs.
The main is a modern take on goulash - casseroled lamb pieces and peppers and so on - but the veges are way underdone and the various components have been assembled rather than cooked as one dish, so you don't get that flavour or character.
They've held back the paprika so far that I'm not sure it was even in the kitchen at the time. Dessert?
The waitress comes over.
Waitress: Tuesdays are $5 Dessert Night. There's spicy rhubarb cake, fruit crumble and ...
SCENE 4: The tables are cleared.
Paul (to Krishna): We're taking the staff bowling tomorrow night. Make them feel like they're part of the team. Would you like to come? Have a pizza, a beer ...
Debs (to Tiffany): Allan likes to cuddle me all night like, y'know, like ... most of the time I just don't feel like it.
Tiffany (to Debs): When Craig does that, I get Mr Bear, my really big teddy, he sleeps in bed with us, and I put Mr Bear in the middle and roll over to the outside.
Ewan (to Jude): Great desserts. Spice-cake like Mum used to make for pudding, love that tart, stewed rhubarb. Home?
