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Home / Lifestyle

'I almost broke': Jennifer Hawkins reveals secret heartbreak

news.com.au
24 Aug, 2019 10:44 PM3 mins to read

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Jennifer Hawkins is weeks away from giving birth to her first child. Photo / Supplied

Jennifer Hawkins is weeks away from giving birth to her first child. Photo / Supplied

When Jennifer Hawkins and Jake Wall announced their pregnancy on Instagram in May they looked like the picture perfect parents-to-be.

But behind the joyful photo was a painful six-year journey that Hawkins kept hidden from the public and now admits "almost broke" her.

For the first time, Hawkins has spoken to Stellar's third anniversary special edition issue about discovering she suffered from severe endometriosis, surgery and a heartbreaking miscarriage, reports News.com.au.

"Last year was such a tough year for Jake and me. It was the toughest year of our lives. I felt like I almost broke and, in fact, it's still really raw," she said. "But Jake was amazing. He let me sit with the pain, feel it and not be OK."

After marrying in 2013, Hawkins and Wall didn't think they would have any trouble falling pregnant.

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"As a woman and a type A personality, I'm used to planning everything. I think this will happen, then this will happen. It seemed like a lifetime as month after month people constantly asked us when we were going to have a baby," she said.

When she eventually did get pregnant, Hawkins and Wall's joy was short-lived, with the couple discovering the baby had no heartbeat at the first scan.

Tests later confirmed Hawkins had endometriosis, with surgery further revealing it was stage four, the most severe possible type of the condition.

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When Hawkins and Wall eventually fell pregnant again this year they were over the moon, but were scared to tell people, even after the 12-week scan.

In May, the couple decided to finally share their news with the world — they were expecting a baby girl.

View this post on Instagram

I’m sooo happy to share with you some exciting news! Jake and I are expecting a baby girl!!! We can’t wait to meet her!🎀💕💓 Thank you to our beautiful family and friends for their love and support and, most importantly, to my hubby Jake – I can’t wait to see you as a Daddy! @jakewwall xx

A post shared by Jennifer Hawkins-Wall (@jenhawkins_) on May 10, 2019 at 12:54am PDT

Now, with just weeks to go, an overjoyed Hawkins can't wait to be a mother and isn't concerned with anything other than having a healthy baby.

"People ask about work, social media, breastfeeding and I just don't know," she said. "I just

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can't predict and it's good for me to let go for a little bit. I had a picture in my head of how many children I wanted by this age, but that's gone out the door.

"Just to see a bump is like no other feeling when you've wanted it for so long. I don't care if I put on weight or get stretch marks; the only thing I can think about is her being healthy."

Hawkins was crowned Miss Universe in 2004 at age 20, with the high-profile accolade launching her career as one of Australia's most successful models.

She was the face of department story Myer for 12 years before stepping down from her ambassador role last year.

Hawkins also has a number of businesses including tanning range JBronze, swimwear label Cozi and Tequila range, Sesión.

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