KEY POINTS:
I don't like to skite but I'm exceptionally good at sticking to my New Year resolutions. This may be because I only ever resolve to do things that make me happy. Not for me any virtuous promises to lose weight, get fit or save money. I know there's no hope, so why bother? This year I've resolved to get a cleaner and eschew domestic drudgery.
In previous years I've promised to take more holidays or have monthly massages. I still have fond memories of 2004 when my resolution was to go out to lunch a lot. Sadly, the year I resolved not to take any rubbish from anyone was not such a golden time.
But, anyway, it's too late for you. By now you'll have already made your resolutions and whether you've vowed to shed 10kg, be healthier or love the planet you might already be starting to struggle. Fear not, gentle well-intentioned reader. The self-help industry is booming, so the solution could be as simple as sitting down and opening a book. Just pick your resolution.
I will lose weight
Australian weight-loss coach Andrew Cate's book is perfect New Year resolution fodder. Called Lighten Up: 365 Ways to Lose Weight and Feel Great (ABC Books, $24.99), it really does have a motivational tip for every day of the year. Today, for instance, being Day 6, (god, already?) the advice from Cate is to "Move More". He appreciates that at this stage it might be a struggle to haul yourself off the sofa so he's suggesting you start small with just a walk. Phew. Later in the year he'll introduce you to the delights of Fartlek training (yes really) and give healthy eating tips.
Cate is good at backing up his advice with persuasive evidence. But what I like most is that he doesn't spend the first five chapters outlining what he's going to tell you further on in the book. He's straight into it from the get-go with no-nonsense advice on how you can shed kilos while still feeling healthy and energetic. Admittedly he did lose me a bit when he suggested unbuttered toast for breakfast. I mean, there's no need to get silly.
I will get healthier
Why vow to get healthier? So you can live longer, of course, and be sprightly in your later years. American doctors Michael Roizen and Mehmet Oz have devised a programme they claim will help you live up to 35 per cent longer and feel younger to boot.
It has a rude pointy finger on the cover, is called Staying You Staying Young: The Owner's Manual for Extending Your Warranty (HarperCollins, $34.99) and is all very jolly in style and layout, but the premise is seductive. The doctors challenge the idea that old means decrepit and talk a lot about what they call your "RealAge", your biological age based on your lifestyle rather than your calendar age. There are chapters on memory, heart fitness, damage limitation, stress, hearing, sleep and much, much more.
Included is lots of medical information but the good doctors keep things approachable with heaps of quizzes, factoids and tips. I couldn't find any references to unbuttered toast - thankfully - but it's a big, thick telephone book of a thing so I may have missed them.
I will be more successful
Success has its price. And in this case it's having to read classic (by that I mean nauseating) US self-help manual Letting Go Of Your Bananas by Dr Daniel Drubin (Hachette, $25.99). Its promise is that you'll become more successful by letting go of everything rotten in your life and it's full of personal homilies from the good doctor to illustrate his points. His advice is soggy at times, risky at others but there's some useful stuff on increasing your resourcefulness, getting rid of barriers, positive thinking and accepting responsibility. It's all extremely American and ra-ra-ra. Read it only if you are the sort of person who can contemplate putting into practise the following tip: "Each day ask yourself, 'Am I doing all that I can to win?'."
I will be nicer to my wife/husband
Marriage is never perfect, but Australian psychotherapist and writer Stephanie Dowrick reckons it can be almost perfect.
Her book, The Almost Perfect Marriage: One Minute Relationship Skills (Allen & Unwin, $24.99), is for anyone who doesn't have the time or inclination to chew through a vast relationship-improving tome. Dowrick highlights ways to achieve a loving, intimate relationship in a series of bite-sized chunks. The key seems to be examining your own behaviour and how it affects your partner. For instance, Dowrick says: "Question the values and beliefs you grew up with - especially about relationships ... Don't live someone else's life. Create your own." It's an honest and wise book.
I will love the planet
The trendiest resolution to make but also the most difficult because making the greenest choice possible is a tricky thing. Mind you, Fighting Globesity by Phillip and Jackie Mills (Random House, $34.99) is a tricky book.
The first half is about you, your weight and your health as you'd expect from the people who run Les Mills gym and its fitness programmes. But then it neatly segues into planetary fitness, looking at issues like climate change and sustainability. It's not a quick read and since parts of it groan with facts and figures, neither is it a simple guide to being eco-friendly. But there are some good calls to action towards the end.
I will be a better parent
Since one of my more successful resolutions was not to have children, I asked our regular children's book reviewer, Camilla During, to scrutinise some useful titles for those fearing they may end up in the horrific, televised grasp of Supernanny. Here's what she thinks:
Many parents struggle with parenting over the school holidays. Having strategies to cope with recalcitrant children can make a huge difference to the happiness quotient of a family.
For harassed parents, New Zealand's own television "super nanny", Diane Levy, dispenses advice in Time Out for Tots, Teens and Everyone In Between (Random House, $29.95). The sub-title enticingly promises, "How to get your children to do as they're told".
Levy is down-to-earth and eminently sensible. If you thought time out was putting a child in its room until he or she apologises for bad behaviour, think again.
Age-appropriate, effective time out, as Levy calls it, is an excellent tool that can be used in many ways.
Levy says it must never be used as a punishment or a threat. Instead she maintains time out is temporary disengagement from social interaction, helping children to think about their behaviour and take responsibility for their actions.
Psychologist Nigel Latta's mini-book, How to Have Kids and Stay Sane (HarperCollins, $19.99), with cartoons by Daryl Crimp, is an overview of parenting and fun to read. The underlying message: Once you've got the basic stuff right, you can enjoy your kids.
Growing Great Boys (Random House, $36.99), by Ian Grant, addresses the particular skills that are needed to turn boys into decent, empathetic men.
Two very popular parenting guides with a spiritual focus are Buddhism for Mothers (Allen and Unwin, $26.95) and its sequel, Buddhism for Mothers with Lingering Questions. These very accessible books by Sarah Napthali are for all mothers who are attempting to raise children without stress and negativity.
And before your child starts the school year it could be a good idea to read the timely No, It's not OK (Penguin Books, $29.99). Tania Roxborogh, a teacher and writer, and co-author Kim Stephenson, a school guidance counsellor, expertly show how to protect your child from bullying and how to deal with a child who bullies.
- Detours, HoS
