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Home / Lifestyle

Goats and Geisha wigs: Gloriavale's strange Trade Me listings

Jenni Mortimer
By Jenni Mortimer
Lifestyle and Travel Editor - Audience·NZ Herald·
17 Aug, 2017 09:49 PM3 mins to read

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'Gloriavale: A Woman's Place' is a documentary about the reclusive Christian Community, Gloriavale.

From a goat named Hector, to a stockpile of Geisha wigs, Gloriavale has taken Trade Me by storm with some truly unique listings.

The Gloriavale Trade Me account was created in 2004 and has sold off some real gems, including a goat name Ruth who was recently listed with the very honest description: "Ruth is not very friendly."

The reclusive Christian community's account is run by a man named John who is clearly doing a stand out job: After listing over 5,800 items, the account boasts an impressive 100 per cent positive feedback rating.

You go Gloriavale.

While their Trade Me feedback game is strong, the items make for an odd collection of second-hand wares.

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Here are the six strangest items for sale on Gloriavale's Trade Me account.

11 GEISHA WIGS

Geisha wig. Photo / Trade Me
Geisha wig. Photo / Trade Me

One can only assume these were used in the Gloriavale Christmas show or for one of Dove Love's musical numbers.

The "quality wigs" come complete with bows and are currently listed for $16 a pop, a real bargain considering we're told they retail for $35. Surely that's something worth singing about.

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Dove singing to her new husband. Photo / TVNZ
Dove singing to her new husband. Photo / TVNZ

PRE-CUT HEART SHAPES

Precut 47mm heart shapes. Photo / Trade Me
Precut 47mm heart shapes. Photo / Trade Me

These 47cm glossy paper hearts are described as "perfect for girls and naming items for catering events."

You have the option to buy them in plain white paper, or have a member of Gloriavale customise them for you at "a cost of 15 cents per sheet".

"HAPPY BOY" BOXER SHORTS

Boys boxer shorts. Photo / Trade Me
Boys boxer shorts. Photo / Trade Me

It seems Gloriavale has a serious stockpile of boys boxer shorts lying around, with a whopping 41 pairs up for grabs.

These never worn before boxers are described as a "really good fit" and "the boys wearing them are finding them very comfortable to wear." No wonder they're called Happy Boy boxers.

HECTOR THE BILLY GOAT

Hector the goat. Photo / Trade Me
Hector the goat. Photo / Trade Me

Turns out being a goat in Gloriavale is a tough gig. This good-looking chap Hector is up for sale because he's related to too many of the Gloriavale girl goats in residence ...

The listing states: "We have several daughters and sisters of him, so we have had to purchase an unrelated Billy."

Hector does appear to be in quite the bad mood in his photos, too. Aside from being miffed about being kicked out of his all-in-the-family flock, his photos appear to have been taken in the dead of night when Hector would clearly rather have been asleep.

GLORIAVALE UNIFORM VEST

Polar fleece vest. Photo / Trade Me
Polar fleece vest. Photo / Trade Me

This XXL vest is part of the official men's uniform for Gloriavale making it a real Trade Me find for fans of the show.

The polar fleece number has three pockets, perfect for stashing all the phone numbers you'll no doubt be slipped while wearing it.

VARIOUS PLANE PARTS

Rear baggage compartment. Photo / Trade Me
Rear baggage compartment. Photo / Trade Me

No, this is not a headboard from a Gloriavale bed, don't be silly.

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This is a rear baggage compartment to suit a Cessna 172 plane and is one of many various plane parts that are for sale on the Gloriavale Trade Me account.

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