Gill South: You are getting sleepy

Can I hypnotise impatience right out of me? Photo / Thinkstock

Opinion

I'm undergoing something I've always been curious about - hypnotherapy. I don't have any of the typical problems which Mind Matters hypnotherapist, Dagi Heider-Fray usually helps people with - biting nails, smoking, a fear of talking in public. I was thinking I'd ask her to cure my sweet tooth but a friend told me I should celebrate this, so I have decided to think more laterally. I'd like to somehow cure my impatient nature.

Auckland traffic lights drive me mad. Were they designed by a sadistic cyclist who goes through the red lights anyway? I also tend to be a bit too materialistic and want things NOW. I'd really like to just be more chilled.

Dagi, who describes herself as a clinical hypnotherapist - she is certified by the American Council of Hypnotist Examiners - seems to think this is a perfectly normal request. Hypnosis, by the way, is a natural yet altered state of consciousness in which the critical faculty (your inner chatter) has been relaxed and selective or focused. Dagi believes that hypnotherapy plus therapy are what are necessary to make a change.

I am really excited about being hypnotised, probably not the best state to be in. Dagi asks me to fix my eyes on a spot on the ceiling. Which was tricky because she'd taken my glasses off, so I just concentrated on the white blur above me. Then she tipped me right back in her very comfy armchair, telling me to listen to her voice and to close my eyes. She tells me if I try to open them they will be locked shut even tighter which makes me feel a bit panicked, but I make myself relax.

Satisfied that I am in the right place (though I'm still able to remind myself I need to pick up some fruit on the way home), Dagi asks me to visualise in which part of the body my impatience starts. I envisage myself driving behind some imbecile and decide it all begins down in my gut and rises to my head. It looks a bit like the steam that comes out of the bottle in I Dream of Jeannie.

Dagi tells me to take it out of my body, give it a name and describe its shape. It looks like a hot air balloon, I say, and I call it Boiling Billy. Billy for short, we decide. What does Billy need, she asks? I decide Billy, who gets a bit stuck in a tree at one point, poor love, needs freedom to move and for some reason, I say he wants to visit friends.

Because poor old Billy's stuck in a tree, I have to get rid of some things from my hot air balloon - are you still with me? - so I'm biffing out sandbags, everything but the rope really, and off he goes again.

Well, Dagi thinks I've made great progress in my session. She brings me out of my relaxed state and concludes that I have voiced what I would like more of - more time with friends, to be outdoors more and to get rid of things that I don't need.

Dagi gives me some affirmations to write down that I am to read out loud three times a day for at least 21 days. One of my affirmations is: "With every passing day it becomes easier for me to slow down and focus on the things that really matter to me." Think I'm going to have to say that more than three times a day while I'm driving.

Next week: Tennis is one of my passions though I hardly play. I have set up a session with David Knott, the head tennis coach at the new club, the Next Generation Auckland Domain. Can't wait.