Five rules for navigating parenting and social media

Parents need to remember just how far those social media posts could go. Photo / Getty Images

A quick scroll through Instagram will have you believe that the next generation of children are doomed.

Kids who are being raised by parents who document their every move on social media and compare them with other people’s children often overshare in the process.

According to the Wall Street Journal, by the time your child turns 5 more than 1000 pictures of them have been posted on social media and 92 per cent of 2-year-olds have an online presence.

Parents are creating a “digital footprint” when posting pictures of their children — which is something that should be taken seriously.

It seems like rules have relaxed around posting children on social media; maybe it was lockdown with nothing else to post about, or maybe it was a lack of awareness outside of our own “bubbles” that dangers still exist. Whatever it was, people’s precious children are all over social media unclothed, unhinged and way overexposed.

As a parent I too love to share little moments of my son, the things he does that make me laugh and the chaos that is parenting. But I also feel there are some rules when it comes to posting about your kids that should never be broken. Because, for me, breaking these rules crosses the line between being funny and being cruel and even unsafe.

So if you find yourself posting heavily edited content, tagging locations, or documenting terrible tantrums then read on to find out why your content could be detrimental to your kids.

My five rules of parenting and social media

Don’t post your children at their lowest

Sure, it’s refreshing to see people posting their lows as well as their highs, but posting your kids wetting their pants, missing the toilet, screaming on the floor, or visibly distressed is a step too far.

The general rule for me is if I wouldn’t post myself doing the same thing on social media then I would never post it of my son.

Imagine if in 1995 your mum posted your wet undies on the community notice board at Big Fresh. There’s virtually no difference between that and sharing with social media that your child has been wetting their pants.

There’s nothing wrong with having a laugh at shoes adorably on the wrong feet, the state of whatever is living under your car seat, or a picture-perfect meal that they tossed on the floor. But shaming your kids in the name of content goes against the number one task we have as parents - protecting our kids.

No nudie rudie

While this should go without saying, posting photos of your kids playing outside with their shirts off, or a cheeky toddler bum on the beach could easily end up in the wrong hands - even if you’re on private and even if you think you know your followers.

If the photos are so cute you simply must post them, you can crop them, or add colour blocks or enlarged emojis over the area at a push. Now is also the perfect time to cull followers who you might not actually know or trust.

Stop comparing

A quick scroll of social media will have you questioning your parenting skills and your kid’s intelligence.

Don’t compare your kid’s developmental milestones to others and don’t slam where your kid is at in the comment section. Commenting, “Lazy little Miss H is still not walking. At this stage I’ll have to carry her into her 21st,” (yes, that’s a real comment I saw) isn’t actually helpful and robs your child of where they are developmentally in that moment by placing pressure on them of where you think they should be.

Comparison is the ultimate thief of joy and social media is the ultimate trigger for it.

Don’t heavily filter or edit them

When posting your beautiful kids on social media there’s no need to airbrush their already perfect skin. We’ve all been guilty of a stylised social media profile with a fun cool tone filter - that’s not the issue here.

The issue is the editing of perceived flaws and pushing insecurities on to your child at a young age. That marmite-covered cheek is perfect just the way it is, as is their hair colour, tired eyes and grubby fingers.

Cut the extreme editing unless you want to bring your kid up with the same insecurities heavily photoshopped magazines cursed you with.

Don’t post when you’re there

When you’re somewhere with your kids you really should be there in that moment with your kids - easier said than done as parks are painfully boring. Once you’ve taken the photo or fired off that quick email, put the phone down and enjoy the moment.

There’s also the super dangerous aspect to consider too - if you’re tagging your location on a platform for thousands to see, then you are basically giving people GPS coordinates to your child, who you may or may not be paying attention to. It’s a terrifying thought should those details get into the wrong hands.

If you don’t stop, put the phone down and soak up these precious moments with your kids, you’ll blink and they’ll be gone.