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Home / Lifestyle

Five actual reasons you should help your partner with housework

Vera Alves
By Vera Alves
NZ Herald Planning Editor and Herald on Sunday columnist·NZ Herald·
30 Dec, 2019 01:54 AM4 mins to read

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Forget doing it for brownie points. Here's the real reason you should help with chores. Photo / 123RF

Forget doing it for brownie points. Here's the real reason you should help with chores. Photo / 123RF

The battle of the sexes has its most aggressive arena in a place that should be the most sacred: people's own homes.

The division of household chores is something that even the best couples have to negotiate and it is a particular point of contention when only one of the people in the couple works outside the home.

Complaints about unhelpful partners are commonplace, especially in the age of social media. However, social or unsocial media, there has never been a time when it was okay for two people to live in a house where only one of them does all the work.

Rather than "help" out to try to "score brownie points" or whatever other ridiculous reasons you've heard before, here are the actual reasons you should do chores at home, regardless of whether you go to work outside the house or not.

1. You live there too

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If your partner is a stay-at-home parent, it is understandable that they end up doing a considerable amount of housework. They spend more time at home so it is a matter of logic that a higher percentage of the chores end up falling on them, by default.

But if your argument relies on the ratio of time spent at home, then remember you don't spend zero per cent of the time there, therefore you should have some chores too. I know I'm hitting you with science early into this list but I just want to be super clear that the fact that you need to help your partner is not just a matter of morals, it's a matter of rigorous mathematical calculations too, if that's the route we need to go down to make our point.

2. You live there too

Evolutionary speaking (see, science again), we must have gone really wrong at some stage. I can't pinpoint exactly when but there was a time when a section of the population started acting like pretending you can't look after yourself is somehow cute. Let's be really clear: that's not cute.

It's not cute to leave your crap lying around for another adult to pick up because you work all day and you're so tired yadda yadda yadda. You're an adult who should be proud to pick up after yourself.

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You're all into life hacks these days and there's no bigger life hack than being a proper, responsible and self-respected human being. That means putting your own socks in the laundry hamper. Also, and I can't stress this enough: you live there too.

3. You live there too

If you have children, please for the love of all that's holy, never ever again tell anyone you're "babysitting" them or "helping" with them. They're your kids too – keeping them and their environment clean and safe is your responsibility too. Oh and also: you live there too.

4. You live there too

Unless you use your penis or your vagina to do some of your housework, then having either of those is no reflection on who should do chores around the house.

There's only one criterion that determines whether or not someone should do chores around the house: whether or not they live there. If you give that as your home address for post to be delivered, then you should do some housework because, guess what? Yup: you live there too.

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5. You live there too

Going to your workplace every day does not automatically exclude you from all the other parts of your life – this includes your home.

If you remember nothing else, remember this: the reason you should clean your house is because you live there too.

Right, I've got some dishes to wash.

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