Entertainment picks: When the going gets tough

Robyn Malcolm (3rd R) tries to get her family to go straight.

TV

If the reality tele creeping into the TV One schedule this week seems worrying, at least it doesn't involve naked Australians banging on about, well, banging. It is reassuring to know that in this age of Big Brother Uncut, alternative shows are churning out earnest fame-seekers, such as the ordinary bunch who put themselves through boot camp on SAS: Desert - Are You Tough Enough? (tonight, TV One, 9.35pm.) Firefighters, teachers and gardeners try their hand at faux war by parachuting, attacking enemy villages and running through sand dunes in searing heat. One by one they're eliminated until the winner is drafted into the Army or something. Then on Wednesday the above formula applies to Spy, (TV One, 8.35pm) as plebs do amateur espionage.

Local drama is also looking up. Outrageous Fortune (Tuesday, TV3, 9.30pm) sees Robyn Malcolm doing a brilliant job of playing Cheryl West, the headstrong mum of a Westie crime family. After hubby Wolfgang (Grant Bowler) is sent to jail she decides they've done enough breaking and entering and insists they all go out and get jobs. Her wannabe model daughter trots off to the local Winz office to launch her modelling career, her younger sister pretends to be Maori so her brother gets a job as a lawyer, and his twin might have just landed them in trouble with the Chinese triads.

And just as you lament the series finale of ER (tonight, TV2, 8.30pm), take heed, the more seductive, funny version is coming soon. Grey's Anatomy (Wednesday, TV2, 8.30pm) follows a bunch of Seattle medical interns as they confront the pressures of the hospital, and more importantly, the hotties who work there. Meredith wakes in the first episode next to some dude whose name she can't remember, and whaddya know, he turns out to be her boss.

Somewhat more original is Veronica Mars (Friday, TV2, 7.30pm), an intelligent, unusual and critically acclaimed new drama. Veronica (Kristin Bell) is a high-school student by day, private investigator for her father by night. (Dad, by the way, is played by Just Shoot Me's Enrico Colantoni). This might sound like Nancy Drew but Veronica's traumatic past means she has a lot more to deal with than your average cheerleader versus nerd teen angst.

Movies

Think about this. You can either pay to see Paris Hilton kick the bucket in House of Wax (opening Thursday) or you can delve into the strange and unpredictable world of the Auckland International Film Festival. Of the latter, it's not easy to know where to start, particularly when what is on offer is as diverse as a Nicole Kidman film (Birth), a doco on wheelchair rugby (Murderball) and a Russian movie that "purports to reveal the meaningless of the number four" (4). But we like the sound of Me and You and Everyone We Know, in which director Miranda July ponders that children long to be adults while adults yearn for their youth.

Social circuit

It's off to Blend on K Rd on Thursday for the launch of Autozamm's debut album, As For Now. The band's tours have been described as pub crawls, so this could be one messy night. We'll be there to holler along to You Don't Know Me in practice for their national tour at the end of the month.

Art

Life can't be that bad. If so, check out the latest exhibition of works from Illicit star Misery. Melancholy Pie (Cross Street Orphanage, K Rd until July 26), features her freakish trademark blend of the coquettish and the sinister, care of alluring little maybe-murderer, Emily Elframo. Also coming soon: the Misery toy. Imagine what fun the kids will have with Chainsaw Charlie.

Music

Thursdays are the new Fridays, haven't you heard? If you want to do it right there must also be rock'n'roll brothers, plenty of Veuve and well-dressed females who work in advertising and PR. Don't know what I'm on about? Well, it all started at Float Bar with a night called Sing Sing, when musos would unplug their amps and sing au naturel in a cool but casual atmosphere.

Then it caught on at Match Bar with goodshirt brothers Rodney and Murray Fisher keeping hard-working professionals up until all hours.

Now it's the Reid brothers - James from the feelers and solo artist Donald - at Pontoon, the huge, swanky, open-plan restaurant in Westhaven.

The main difference with this one is the music starts at 9pm so you won't feel you're waiting for a drum'n'bass DJ to come on. We recommend getting there early for a meal anyway and trying the snapper with ginger and coconut foam (seriously) followed by some cocktail-induced moshing at the bar. This Thursday it's Gramsci singer Paul McLaney.

The best thing about going out on a Thursday is that by Saturday you're ready to do it again. And this Saturday it would be rude not to because Fat Freddy's Drop are playing the St James.

Don't expect to be hitting the pillow at a reasonable hour though. This is your chance to hear the live, and no doubt exploratory, rendition of the legendary Welly band's debut album Based on a True Story, the first independent release to go to number one in this country since Jazzercise in 1981. The boys have some nice new tracksuits to wear for the occasion too.