Entertainment picks: Get ready for showtime

Patricia Arquette in Medium.

TV

Maahvellous. John Campbell's new current affairs show on TV3 starts tonight and so, too, the phenomenon commonly known as the "7pm ratings battle". I wonder, will that extend to viewers? Will otherwise loving couples engage in a tug of war over the remote?

Who knows, but what is just as important as the competition from Paul Holmes and Close-Up At 7 is whether Campbell Live can pull as many followers as Homer and Marge. Meanwhile, C4's ratings in the 7pm slot have increased marginally since Paul Holmes replaced Hogan's Heroes on Prime, the surprise factor here is the popularity of the old classic (Hogan's, that is), among 15-year-olds to 29-year-olds.

Speaking of the music channel, their rivals should be quaking in their boots - as of this week, its 7pm slot stars the biggest personalities of them all, Ren & Stimpy.

Just when you thought you'd never hear "I see dead people" again, along comes Patricia Arquette. The breathy blonde isn't a stranger to spooky roles, after starring in Bringing Out the Dead, A Nightmare on Elm Street 3 and Stigmata.

In her first major TV job, Medium (Tuesday, TV3, 9.30pm), she plays Allison Dubois, the real-life Arizona housewife who used her sixth sense to help to solve murders and missing-person cases. Sceptical? Well my psychic abilities tell me the show will be a stylish, X-Files-ish alternative to Cold Case and CSI.

Or maybe I've just been reading good reviews on the internet.

Movies

Everything opens Thursday, starting with Hitch, a rom-com that returns Will Smith to his splendour as a fresh prince. Smith plays a "date doctor" who gets rich by showing wimpy men how to woo women. The tables are turned when his expertise fails to impress his love interest, gossip columnist Sara Melas (Eva Mendes). Reviews of the film have been mediocre. Most critics have praised the performances but bagged the cheesy ending. Well, if there aren't any explosions or jokes about black men teaching white men a lesson, what did they expect?

For a slightly deeper romantic tale, Ken Loach's Ae Fond Kiss deals with the inter-racial relationships between a Muslim Pakistani man and a Catholic Irish woman.

Also opening is James Cameron's Titanic 3D, Ghosts of the Abyss, a doco that, confusingly, sounds like two of the director's best-known films combined. Armed with the latest in underwater submersible technology, 3D cameras, historic and marine experts - and his friend, Bill Paxton - Cameron embarks on an unscripted adventure to the ship's grave in the North Atlantic. Hopefully Celine Dion's theme music is swimming with the fishes, too.

Social circuit

We all know the best ideas come after a few drinks, so what better way to celebrate Kiwi ingenuity than a spot of bar-hopping?

The creative minds behind the Absolut vodka brand unveiled a 7m high bottle at Auckland's Viaduct. Alas, they forgot to fill it. To make up for it, Kiwi artists were asked to interpret the No. 8 wire mentality in their own ways and, as a result, art installations are displayed at bars around Auckland, with a cocktail to accompany them. Just head to Spy, Lenin, Soul, the Green Room and Sponge until March 29.

Festival

From Thursday to Sunday the Royal Easter Show is on at the Auckland Showgrounds.

For a while organisers were trying to attract a cooler crowd with extreme BMX riders and all that carry on but it seems they have gone back to appealing to the people who actually want to come: the under-10s.

This year, the kids can bop along to the dancing characters from Shrek 2 and Powerpuff Girls and win Easter eggs from the Weber Brothers Circus before throwing them up in the Gravitron. But given the circumstances, I'm stumped as to who they're trying to attract by including a Michael Jackson lookalike in the line-up. Yes I know, innocent until proven guilty ...

Music

If you like garage-blues, head along to the Kings Arms tonight for Ohio duo the Black Keys, who are touring their latest album, Rubber Factory. A Billboard critic said the band "play the kind of raw, sensual blues-rock that makes you want to hide your girlfriend and warn your mom". So hide and warn away. Backing up the reviews is the fact they played a gig at New York's Carnegie Hall with Kinks' Ray Davies.

You may need to hide your girlfriend again though when singer-songwriter-laidback-surfer-dude-with-killer-moustache Donavon Frankenreiter turns up this week. He is so popular he has had to add another gig at the Studio. So if you missed out on tickets to his Friday night show, be in quick for the Saturday.

If you can't wait that long, head to Billabong (his sponsor) on Queen St at 5pm today, where the man will be signing autographs and playing a couple of tunes. Or you could just talk about the waves, man.

Oh, and if you're in town for the long weekend, Norah Jones is playing at the Aotea Centre on Saturday.