Divorcees reveal signs that their marriage was doomed

Many online commenters said unresolved arguments were a key factor in their divorce. Photo / 123rf

Divorcees have taken to an online forum to reveal some of the red flags that signalled their marriage was over.

Hundreds of Reddit users joined the thread, which included tales of frequent arguments and lies, a lack of communication, and even a man who ignored his wife as soon as the wedding papers were signed.

"I got married at the courthouse downtown, one woman wrote. "Immediately after signing the papers and being pronounced married, we walked outside to leave. My new husband spent the next hour and a half talking to his buddy and texting while I walked behind them. They then dropped me off at home and left. It didn't last long."

Another user said its not about what you disagree on, it's how you disagree.

"There's no such thing as two people perfect for each other, and how you approach the friction is what either strengthens or eats away at a relationship," they wrote.

"When you disagree, do you discuss the issue of the person? Is it, 'I want sushi, but you want pizza', or is it, 'You always want sushi, I never get pizza.'"

Other users said the age-old adage about never going to bed on an argument was particularly true, and many admitted that unresolved arguments played a key role in the relationship breakdown.

"Disagreements, arguments, and fights went unresolved," one person commented. "And she liked to go for passive aggressive digs instead of resolutions."

Another user admitted her marriage was doomed because she was afraid of her partner.

"He had a short temper and was extremely controlling and possessive," she wrote.

"I realised how similar our relationship was to that of my parents and grandparents-my dad is also very short-tempered and selfish and had a habit of belittling my mom for almost everything..."

Another user said they could tell at the wedding that the relationship wasn't going to last.

"I was the best man at my brother's wedding, they wrote. "I was standing beside him at the altar, looking at his bride. During their vows she couldn't look him in the eye for more than a second. I knew then that she wasn't really in love. One year later they were divorced."

One commenter vented with a long list of marriage woes, including religious differences, a partner that isolated him from friends and family.

"Before you get into a long-term relationship or marriage, be sure that you know how to stand up for yourself," he wrote. "Know your boundaries, emotional and physical, and be prepared to walk away earlier rather than later."

Ouch.