"Before the date, figure out your own core values (your guiding principles in life, the things that motivate you and underpin your beliefs) and your lifestyle preferences. These factors will help you determine the potential compatibility between you and your date," she said.
"Know Thyself is the best advice here - by being self-aware and honest with yourself about what you really want, you can be upfront with your dates so that expectations are clear from the outset," she said.
Before revealing the first date is a "golden opportunity" to look for anything, you might consider a red flag.
She went on to say the main topics you want to touch on with your date are children, monogamy, what makes them angry, their long-term goals and what they are passionate about.
Schilling later explained it's important to ask questions that will tell you if the person is ready for a monogamous relationship and if they want children or would like to get married.
For men, she suggested being "sensitive about the way you discuss" children as women's "fertility journey can be fraught with challenges, pain, fear, expectations and disappointment."
For women, the relationship expert said the same but added you don't have to "lay it all bare" and tell your date every detail of your life and whether or not you can have or want children, but you can use the date as a way to "determine what type of future your date sees for themselves."
Schilling explained questions to check baby alignment without "adding too much pressure" is key.
The most important piece of advice Schilling suggested is making sure your potential partner's values align with yours.
You can do this by asking open-ended questions, they don't have to be heavy and serious she said, but can be fun.
