Welcome to the royal enclosure, Lindsay Wallace!
The House of Windsor has had a new bit player enter the stage this weekend in the form of the Queen's eldest grandson Peter Phillips' new girlfriend.
First they were spotted at the Platinum Jubilee celebrations at the Epsom Derby (her hat was appropriately vertiginous) and then later Wallace and Phillips found themselves directly in the line of sight of a 1001 cameras seated behind his uncle Prince Charles at the Party at the Palace concert.
However, the most interesting photo, the most fascinating snap from the Queen's Platinum Jubilee knees-up so far is the one we have not seen — that of the 96-year-old monarch meeting her 1-year-old namesake Lilibet Diana Mountbatten-Windsor.
On Saturday Lili, Harry and Meghan, Duke and Duchess of Sussex's second child, marked her first birthday in the UK with reports suggesting some sort of small family party was going to be held at the Sussexes' Windsor home, Frogmore Cottage.
More notable still, the same day had also been earmarked for the big introduction of Lilibet senior to Lilibet junior.
Some reports have suggested the meeting took place on Thursday after Trooping the Colour at Buckingham Palace but this has not been confirmed. It would also have been an illogical way of doing things — why would Harry and Meghan drag a baby an hour in a car into central London to meet her great-grandmother when they are staying less than a 10-minute drive away from one another in Windsor?
The Twitter accounts of the Queen, Prince Charles and William and Kate, Duke and Duchess of Cambridge, were all quick off the mark on Saturday morning, UK time, all sharing warm and nearly identical birthday wishes. In all of the posts, glaringly absent was any sort of image.
So, why the Lili media blackout?
After all, the world got its first glimpse of Her Majesty's 11th great-grandchild in December last year when the Sussexes released a Christmas card starring Lili and her adorable big brother Archie, now 3 years old, the snap so perfectly styled and contrived it could have doubled as a Ralph Lauren ad.
The most obvious argument against releasing an image of Her Majesty and Lili goes like this — if the Palace had released a shot of them together, say the Queen sweetly cradling the bub, then the it would have blown all other Jubilee coverage out of the water and off the front pages, thus undermining the relentless focus that they are trying to keep on the history-making monarch and lining King Charles III up in the public imagination.
That is a rationale that, to me anyway, doesn't really hold water. Many of the front pages in the UK on Saturday featured the Sussexes' turn at service of thanksgiving for the Queen held at St Paul's, even though their new lowly status meant that they were shunted off to sit in the second row and behind the 31st line to the throne, the Duke of Gloucester.
No matter the lengths the Palace is going to put the duo in their place and signal just how expendable they are to the monarchy, the reality is that Harry and Meghan could have been made to sit behind a pole in the very back of the church with bags over their heads but the sheer fact that they were back in the same room as Charles and the Cambridges was always going to feature heavily in media coverage.
This was the first time that both of the Sussexes had come face-to-face with the Windsors in public since the detonation that was their Oprah Winfrey interview, in which they levelled claims of institutional racism at the Palace, with the duchess revealing that joining the royal ranks had driven her to experience suicidal thoughts.
My point is, in simply going back to the UK together, Harry and Meghan's very presence was always going to be something of a distraction so why not use it to Buckingham Palace's advantage?
I reckon courtiers and aides have really missed a trick here.
Imagine if we had seen this photo of the Queen and Lili — it would have been a powerful checkmate on the part of Her Majesty in the PR chess match which the Sussexes seem intent on playing with the Palace.
The most obvious message would have been that the Jubilee girl was the bigger person and no matter the prime-time sins of Lili's parents, the Queen was, and would always be, a doting great-grandmother. She would have come across as forgiving and loving, very much counter to the image of the royal family as cold-hearted which Harry and Meghan's claims have made them out to be.
This photo would also have served as something of a line being drawn under the Sussex-instigated agitation and dramas. One wants to move on.
In short, releasing a Queen and Lili shot would have represented the royal house retaking command of the situation and reclaiming the narrative rather than letting Harry and Meghan call the media shots as they have been.
An added benefit of our imaginary photo here is that it would also have gone some way to serving as an antidote to the prevailing whiff of acrimony that has seemed to waft over the Jubilee appearances by the Sussexes.
So far, Harry and Meghan have been pliantly toeing the line and have been on their best behaviour — there have been no public histrionics or attempts by a Netflix film crew to barge their way into St Paul's — nor do they seem to have been putting in much of an effort.
On Thursday, after Trooping, the entire royal family, working and non-working, descended on Buckingham Palace for a slap-up lunch. (Here's hoping that the Queen sent someone down to her 38,000-bottle cellar to get a few decent bottles of plonk for the occasion.) Some reports suggest that Harry and Meghan did not go.
Likewise, the events of Friday. Following the thanksgiving service, the Duke and Duchess of Sussex "declined to attend" the reception at the London Guildhall, according to the Telegraph, even though the rest of the extended troop of Windsors all rolled up. (We have Princess Anne's son-in-law Mike Tindall to thank for sharing a cheeky and fun shot of his wife Zara and her cousin Princess Eugenie looking like they were having a ball at the lunchtime do.)
Ditto the Saturday night concert at the Palace at which the Sussexes were a no-show. (Yes, it was Lili's birthday but the blowout, starring among many others Alicia Keys, Elton John, Rod Stewart and Lin-Manuel Miranda, started at 8pm, surely after the kids' bedtime.)
The overall impression is that the couple seem to be doing the barest of the bare minimum to have qualified as attending the event.
The question to ask at this point is, could the Sussexes' keeping their distance from the royal family outside of big official events have anything to do with either Harry's upcoming memoir and the reported "at-home" docu-series they are filming for Netflix? Or are things simply so toxic between Charles and Diana, Princess of Wales' sons that they can't bear to be even in the vaguest vicinity of one another?
When Charles took to the stage during the Palace concert, he asked the 10,000-strong crowd to cheer so loudly that his "Mummy" might hear at Windsor Castle 34km away and they obliged. Even the stoniest of hearts and most fervent republicans among us couldn't fail to be moved by such an outpouring of warmth and gratitude.
While yes, the Jubilee is essence an elaborate marketing exercise, a chance for the Palace to re-up support for the crown and to sell the monarchy to younger generations, but it also about a nation saying thank you to the nonagenarian who has been unswerving in her lifelong commitment to a job she never wanted.
And it is exactly that which seems to be missing from the Sussexes' UK return: They do not seem to have gotten into the Union Jack-waving spirit of the four-day long weekend and have so far failed to publicly really enthusiastically get into the swing of this remarkable, history-making moment.
One thing Harry and Meghan have steadfastly maintained is their respect for the Queen and yet at this moment when the entire nation of Great Britain and much of the world is showing their gratitude for Her Majesty, the Sussexes have gone AWOL.
Where is the enthusiasm? Where is any sort of demonstrable show of joy on their part that she has reached such a remarkable milestone?
On Sunday, the whole royal family, including their kids, are expected to turn up for the afternoon Jubilee Pageant which will be taking place along the Mall and around St James's Park. Will Harry and Meghan make an appearance or will they continue to swerve any optional outings that would mean close-ish proximity to William and Kate? (Surely the two couples could simply stay a polite distance away from one another and the princes have a lifetime of experience of plastering on a cheerful face in public.)
During Charles' tribute he said of the Queen, "You continue to make history." Sadly, so too do the Sussexes and for all the wrong reasons.
• Daniela Elser is a royal expert and a writer with more than 15 years experience working with a number of Australia's leading media titles.