Comment: I'm 56 and still sunbathe topless – and why not?

Topless sunbathing has been declared a fundamental French "liberty". Photo / 123rf

For midlifers like me, the usual debate about what to wear on the beach is limited to choosing between a one piece or a bikini. Many believe 40 is the tipping point for a two piece; others will only wear a bikini if they have also invested in a kaftan cover up.

I fall into neither camp, preferring to ditch the bikini top altogether. I'm a firm believer that beach holidays are when you can be your best fun and carefree self. They are not the time to be fretting about the size of your belly or age of your thighs. Which is why, every year, I think nothing about getting to my sunlounger and whipping off my bikini top. I may now be 56, but I do this without any thought; completely unfazed.

So, I cheered this week when I heard that topless sunbathing has been declared a fundamental French "liberty". Feminists, right-wing nationalists and leftists have been united in outrage that police had ordered women on a beach in Sainte-Marie-la-Mer to cover their breasts after a family had complained.

Absolument! Since I was 16 and on holiday in the South of France with my friends, I have been soaking up the rays sans bikini top. In the 1980s we wafted around the golden sands of Portofino and Sicily flaunting our lithe bronzed bodies wearing only skimpy bikini bottoms, an ankle bracelet and a suntan, and checking the admiring glances from local boys.

Fast forward nearly four decades and while the admiring glances are a thing of the past, skimpy bikini bottoms and not much else is still my go to beach uniform.

Don't worry, I am more than aware that my days of beach babe chic are well and truly over. Like most women, my body has changed, with middle-aged spread and saggy bottom syndrome being just two of the hard to tackle areas.

But that doesn't mean I have to cover up. No way. To me sunbathing topless is part of the holiday experience. It is also the only way you're going to avoid those white triangles and get an all over tan. I am careful to cover up with sunscreen to avoid burning, but there is nothing like a full body sunkiss to make you feel and look healthy. And Vitamin D, as we know, is very good for you.

Of course not everyone agrees with my bare it all approach. I distinctly remember several years ago on holiday in Majorca with my then fiance and a few other couples. As I stripped off, some of the men gawped, and a few of the women tutted and whispered amongst themselves, seeing it as some sort of come hither gesture to their balding hubbies. Dear reader, it most certainly was not.

My topless love affair isn't about anyone else, but me. After months of being caged in underwired bras and layers of woollens, I find it liberating to feel my body drinking in the golden rays. There is something about heat and near nakedness that makes me feel fun and footloose. Why should it matter whether I'm 26 or 56?

The truth is the beach is a sort of fantasy land where normal rules don't apply. We're all half naked in a public setting anyway, so really It's more about being context appropriate than age-inappropriate.

Also, I do find it a peculiarly British trait to feel uncomfortable around topless sunbathing. Our collective guilt about our bodies - its apogee during the Victorian era - has persisted at a subliminal level to this day. For some reason we still see nudity and breasts as something out of a Carry On Film more nudge nudge, wink wink than something celebratory and sensual. All this is usually manifested on holiday in a series of ill-fated sarong purchases to cover up any sight of dimpled flesh and a line in study swimsuits.

Our European friends have a somewhat different attitude. Go to any Mediterranean beach and you will see all generations of women, grannies among them, happily walking along the shore, groups of young women chatting in the sea - many in bikinis, some topless, no one really caring about what they look like. This collective unabashedness about their bodies whatever size and shape, is so much healthier and more attractive than the fretful beachgoer worrying if she's showing too much cleavage for her age.

Maybe I'm just an old hippie, out of step with the times. It is rather shocking to hear the latest call to cover-up happened on a French beach and maybe there is a new vogue for prudishness. Still, I am comforted to hear that French women aren't taking this lying down and that there is a backlash of sorts. Because, at the end of the day, going topless is about freedom. The freedom to be who you want, and wear what you want, whatever your age. Now where are my gold lamé bikini bottoms?

The midlifers' guide to going topless

Avoid swinging breast syndrome

Suddenly you think it would be a great idea to play a bit of beach tennis. Remember lying on the beach lounger topless good; bouncing up and down by the water's edge, borderline attention seeking and clumsy.

Know where the lines in the sand are

What is insouciant and girlie on the beach or around the swimming pool, just becomes distinctly age-inappropriate anywhere else. Wear a top/a floaty kaftan cover-up in the beach bar. Just manners really.

Size matters

If like me you are of the fried egg variety you can dare to bare with ease and panache, Dolly Parton-esque you will need to think about how you are going to manage that when you get off the sun lounger.

Accessorise

A big floppy sun hat and a huge smile. Works every time. Nipple decoration not so much.

Be aware of your surroundings

Gardeners, pool guy or teens. They may stare/laugh/be distinctly uncomfortable or all three. Sometimes it's not all about you.

Play by the rules

If you are a guest at someone's holiday villa/party, pulling off your top as you settle around the pool for mojitos and general chit chat may offend. It's a judgement call.