Book review: I Give My Marriage A Year, by Holly Wainright

I Give My Marriage A Year, by Holly Wainwright

I Give My Marriage A Year
by Holly Wainwright
(Pan Macmillan, $35)
Reviewed by Hannah Tunnicliffe

Lou Winton's life is a brand of perfection many dream of. She has a career and two young daughters, a nice house and a husband who loves her. But by the end of the first chapter of I Give My Marriage A Year by Holly Wainwright it's clear that Lou is miserable and doing exactly that: giving her and her husband, Josh, 12 months to make it or break it.

Lou and Josh's marriage is in tatters, torn apart by big-ticket items like grief, loss and betrayal but shredded more regularly by daily compromise, cynicism, disappointment and bitterness. It's a typical marriage in mid-life, on the verge of collapse or repair but neither party is sure which way it's going to go. Josh observes: "They never had moved to New York. Or Arnhem Land. He had never built them a house in a tropical rainforest and Lou still hadn't written a play. Their life had been smaller than the one they'd imagined." In a bid to reinvigorate the flagging relationship Lou decides to focus on one redemptive project each month. Perhaps sex will save it? Or honesty? Or therapy?

It's told in alternating Lou and Josh point-of-view chapters and detailing both their past and present. I found myself getting in the ring with these two: taking score and picking sides. Surprisingly, professional carpenter and amateur musician Josh, consistently loyal and hopeful though lacking a bit of oomph, usually got my vote. Wainwright really lends her compassion and astuteness to Josh's thoughts and emotions. But whether you are reading about a marriage or are in one: this ledger approach isn't sustainable. It's not a boxing match, even if it might feel like one at times. Marriages are simply unsimple and unwinnable.

In I Give My Marriage A Year Wainwright has created a cast of characters most readers will be familiar with: a tired and dissatisfied wife and a burnt-out and falling-short husband, an unpleasant mother in law and long-suffering father in law, distant siblings, problematic work colleagues and — my favourite — a best friend who sees through the murkiness and knows exactly what should be done. With another writer's direction these characters might become cliched but Wainwright adds back-story, humour, psychological insight and explanations that deepen your interest and attachment. With Wainwright, even the bad guys have layers.

While you could easily enjoy this book on holiday, it does not take you on a holiday. If anything it keeps you, uncomfortably, in the trenches of domestic discontentment. Wainwright is not in a rush to answer the burning question: Does Josh and Lou's marriage have the love and fortitude to make it through the year? If you want to know you'll have to read it to find out.