I remember the morning of Diwali. There is a stillness. A calmness. Maybe the smoky trails from the patchouli incense have softened the eyes. Maybe the burning diya has lured the ancestors. My favourite rule: no fighting allowed.
The energy between this day and the days leading up to Diwali felt almost seismic. My parents, for days, would be cleaning every corner of the home in Auckland. Inside and outside. Up and down. Ma would spend hours making sweets, rolling dough while sitting on a chatai spread across the floor.
Of these entirely intimate experiences, I have only glimpses. I struggle with my mother tongue, and I am agnostic, at times an enthusiastic atheist. But I still celebrate the light with my family. It’s not just tradition. It’s part of what keeps us connected.
But what is Diwali? What does all this mean? Do you have to be religious to be involved? What do you say to your neighbour who is celebrating?
If you found yourself asking any of these questions, I have asked them too. Let me guide you.
The word Diwali, also sometimes pronounced Divali, comes from the Sanskrit word Deepavali, meaning “row of lights”. The light refers to lighted diya (little oil lamps, traditionally made from terracotta). The celebration is often referred to as the “festival of lights”.
Diwali is really old. Like, at least 2500 years old.
There are many origin tales, all of which begin in India. Perhaps the most popular one in Hindu mythology tells of Rama, a Hindu deity, returning home after 14 years of exile, during which he defeated the demon king Ravana.
Rama, his wife Sita Devi, and his little brother Laxmana were sent to exile as a promise to Rama’s stepmother and father, paving the way for his stepmother’s son to become the future king. The trio dutifully obeyed.
They settled down in a forest, and everything was going well until demoness Surpanakha appeared. She was the sister of the evil 10-headed Ravana.
Surpanakha became enamoured with the two brothers, but they both rejected her. Enraged with jealousy, she went to attack Sita. Rama intervened in time and cut off her nose.
Surpanakha told Ravana what happened. She also told him about Sita’s beauty, convincing him to take her as his wife instead.
Ravana kidnapped Sita on his flying chariot. But the brothers located them with the help of Hanuman, a deity who resembles a monkey, and an actual army of monkeys. Rama struck Ravana with his arrow and killed him.
At the end of the 14-year exile period, Rama, Sita and Laxmana made their way back home. People of the surrounding villages lit diya to ensure the trio found their way in the darkness of the night.
Light in Diwali not only symbolises the lighting of the diya at the end of exile, but also the triumph of good against evil, light over dark. For many practitioners, it marks the beginning of the new year.
Not everyone in the South Asian community celebrates Diwali. It’s a religious celebration comprising several rituals and customs followed by Hindus, Sikhs and Jains. For many of them, Diwali is the most significant event in their religion’s calendar.
While it originated in India, it’s also an official holiday in countries like Fiji, Trinidad and Tobago, Mauritius, Myanmar, Nepal, Malaysia, Pakistan, Singapore, Sri Lanka and Suriname.
You don’t have to be religious to take part in festivities. For many people, Diwali is an occasion to spread joy and harmony, so the more the merrier. Basically, it’s about good vibes.
Monday, October 20. The exact date changes every year because it depends on the position of the moon, though it’s always sometime in October or November.
These days, Diwali seems as commercialised as Christmas. Every year, many companies try to connect their product to Diwali as a marketing moment to capture certain members of the South Asian community.
At organised festivals, you can expect entertainment and food. There’s usually singing and dancing on a stage, with stalls serving vegetarian Indian food and sweets. You may also see stalls where you can get temporary henna (mehndi) tattoos on your hands. Don’t expect alcohol.
Hindus, Sikhs and Jains usually start their Diwali preparations well before the actual day of Diwali or festivals. While rituals vary from family to family, in general, people try to avoid conflicts inside and outside the home. This is an auspicious time.
As part of our family rituals, my dad says deep house cleaning starts at the beginning of spring.
“We also don’t eat meat for at least one week earlier,” Dad says.
My mum and her sisters start making sweets about two weeks before Diwali, such as barfi (sort of like cube-shaped, milk-based fudge), lakri mithai (sweet and salty deep-fried “sticks”), gulab jamun (fried milk powder balls dipped in syrup) and jalebi (intensely sweet, orange crispy swirls).
Two days before Diwali, my parents light one diya and place it outside the house for Yama Raj, the Hindu god of death. On the day before Diwali, another diya is lit for Laxmi, the goddess of wealth.
Families gather on the day of Diwali for a pooja, or prayer. Before starting, people should have already had their shower so prayer is done with a clean body. Pooja may involve offerings of fruit, sweets and flowers to gods – this is called a prasad – lighting of incense and a silent prayer.
At the end, there is arti. One person takes a stainless steel dish that has a flame burning into every room of the house. This is to bless or purify the home as a new year emerges.
It’s common for families to then take the sweets they prepared and share them with neighbours, other relatives, friends and colleagues. Do not be surprised if you get a friendly knock on the door!
Yes! It’s polite to offer (and accept) some vegetarian food or sweets. Steer clear of wine or beer until after Diwali, if they drink.
Anything. Some might wear traditional clothing, but no one will be bothered if you rock up in stubbies and a T-shirt. (Though, technically, this is a fashion crime.)
Happy Diwali! Or shubh (pronounced “shoob”) Diwali! Shubh means “prosperous” in Hindi.
Varsha Anjali is a journalist in the lifestyle team at the Herald. Based in Auckland, she covers culture, travel and more.