Mum of six Stella Barlow was shocked at how easy it is for predators to contact children over the internet. Photo / Supplied
Mum of six Stella Barlow was shocked at how easy it is for predators to contact children over the internet. Photo / Supplied
A regional online harm wānanga organised by a Hauraki Māori women’s refuge has alarmed and armed a māmā of six with the shocking online material freely available online to children.
The wānanga, organised by Te Whāriki Manawāhine o Hauraki, was an “eye-opener” for Stella Barlow.
“My first reaction was whaton earth can I do? Right, that’s it all online goes offline. There will be no iPads, no iPhones, no nothing. However, in reality, this is about having conversations about how to be safe online,” Barlow, whose children are aged 6-18, said.
Barlow believes it’s a minefield for her tamariki and rangatahi. When they’re at home, she can lock it down but when they move outside her whare, it’s a different story.
“My 18-year-old daughter is what I would call ‘tech savvy’. She uses Instagram and Facebook. Comes to me, saying oh, my god, Mum, I get these private messages from males!”
Her daughter described receiving DMs from people with no profile picture and weird names messaging about her pretty profile pic.
“What I do know about my girl is she’s very protective of her own space. So, her first reaction to that type of message is “Bro. I don’t know who you are so don’t message me these kinds of things.”
The online wānanga was open for all to attend in Thames.
“At that time, when she first joined Instagram, she took control by connecting with close friends for support and securing her privacy. She changed her settings, making her profile private, so now her audience is limited to only those she trusts.”
The online gaming platform also causes concerns for Barlow, given its social networking element.
“I think about PlayStation, PS 4 and PS 5. Before you would chuck the CD on and that was it. You couldn’t talk to somebody on the other side of the world. Now you can. I hear my kids on the headphones but who exactly are they talking to? What are these other conversations happening in the background?”
Although internet providers have security settings to filter content, she also raises the issue about how it diminishes when the device is on the move which parents need to be mindful of.
“When my 10-year-old son’s iPad comes online it recognises my security settings so YouTube’s not going to come up and there are age restrictions that I control. However, as soon as he’s away from our internet connection, so if he’s at Nan’s, all of that stuff just floods back in.”
“Then when he steps outside of our whare I think, fudge, what can I do? Our son doesn’t have messenger apps or things like that due to not being at that age yet. But I noticed all of a sudden, we started having these conversations about God, how great God is, and Jesus and things like that because of the filters.”
“But even prior to the filters, there were small videos by influencers filming themselves playing Grand Theft Auto. Next thing I know, my 6-year-old is playing copycat at home.”
Amokura Panoho, co-chair of Te Pūkotahitanga and poutaki mātauranga Māori of Netsafe. Photo / Supplied
The presentation by Amokura Panoh, co-chair of Te Pūkotahitanga and poutaki mātauranga Māori of Netsafe, caught many of the women by surprise.
“Online groomers often pretend to share interest, offer emotional support and gradually isolate their targets. They frequently escalate their control in secrecy which is why it’s crucial for caregivers and communities to be vigilant at all times,” Panoho said.
“It’s important that every one of you who have multiple children that have a Facebook page or Instagram know about the parent control functionality released today by Meta so a child cannot access the channel without the parent’s authority.”
The wānanga conversation also touched on the targeting of marginalised communities, such as wāhine Māori, with bot-driven harassment. Panoho also warned of the risks of posting images of tamariki online, which can create a lasting digital presence and be exploited.
“The reality is there’s quite significant psychological and emotional impacts of online harm. They’re profound, often resulting in anxiety, depression and long-term mental health issues, emotional distress and confusion. I think confusion is underrated. Māori tamariki are disproportionately affected by these issues, facing higher rates of cyberbullying and harmful content exposure,” she said.
“So again, this underscores the importance of cultural responsive support and intervention strategies, the need for stronger regulations and a Māori online safety ecosystem.”
Netsafe has developed customised reo Māori resources on its website that includes a guardian guide, social media guides and whānau gaming toolkit.
“One project they collaborated on with Vodafone was the creation of a package of a mobile phone wrapped with helpful resources. So, when you give your teenager their first phone, the package includes not just the phone but also valuable resources to guide them.”
Panoho was appointed to a subgroup within the National Iwi Chairs Forum specifically to deal with online safety.
“It’s essential to integrate cultural practices, technological innovation, and community engagement to tackle the unique challenges our community faces in the digital space,” she said.
