NZ Herald
  • Home
  • Latest news
  • Video
  • New Zealand
  • Sport
  • World
  • Business
  • Entertainment
  • Podcasts
  • Quizzes
  • Opinion
  • Lifestyle
  • Travel
  • Viva
  • Weather forecasts

Subscriptions

  • Herald Premium
  • Viva Premium
  • The Listener
  • BusinessDesk

Sections

  • Latest news
  • New Zealand
    • All New Zealand
    • Crime
    • Politics
    • Education
    • Open Justice
    • Scam Update
  • Budget 2025
  • On The Up
  • World
    • All World
    • Australia
    • Asia
    • UK
    • United States
    • Middle East
    • Europe
    • Pacific
  • Business
    • All Business
    • MarketsSharesCurrencyCommoditiesStock TakesCrypto
    • Markets with Madison
    • Media Insider
    • Business analysis
    • Personal financeKiwiSaverInterest ratesTaxInvestment
    • EconomyInflationGDPOfficial cash rateEmployment
    • Small business
    • Business reportsMood of the BoardroomProject AucklandSustainable business and financeCapital markets reportAgribusiness reportInfrastructure reportDynamic business
    • Deloitte Top 200 Awards
    • CompaniesAged CareAgribusinessAirlinesBanking and financeConstructionEnergyFreight and logisticsHealthcareManufacturingMedia and MarketingRetailTelecommunicationsTourism
  • Opinion
    • All Opinion
    • Analysis
    • Editorials
    • Business analysis
    • Premium opinion
    • Letters to the editor
  • Sport
    • All Sport
    • OlympicsParalympics
    • RugbySuper RugbyNPCAll BlacksBlack FernsRugby sevensSchool rugby
    • CricketBlack CapsWhite Ferns
    • Racing
    • NetballSilver Ferns
    • LeagueWarriorsNRL
    • FootballWellington PhoenixAuckland FCAll WhitesFootball FernsEnglish Premier League
    • GolfNZ Open
    • MotorsportFormula 1
    • Boxing
    • UFC
    • BasketballNBABreakersTall BlacksTall Ferns
    • Tennis
    • Cycling
    • Athletics
    • SailingAmerica's CupSailGP
    • Rowing
  • Lifestyle
    • All Lifestyle
    • Viva - Food, fashion & beauty
    • Society Insider
    • Royals
    • Sex & relationships
    • Food & drinkRecipesRecipe collectionsRestaurant reviewsRestaurant bookings
    • Health & wellbeing
    • Fashion & beauty
    • Pets & animals
    • The Selection - Shop the trendsShop fashionShop beautyShop entertainmentShop giftsShop home & living
    • Milford's Investing Place
  • Entertainment
    • All Entertainment
    • TV
    • MoviesMovie reviews
    • MusicMusic reviews
    • BooksBook reviews
    • Culture
    • ReviewsBook reviewsMovie reviewsMusic reviewsRestaurant reviews
  • Travel
    • All Travel
    • News
    • New ZealandNorthlandAucklandWellingtonCanterburyOtago / QueenstownNelson-TasmanBest NZ beaches
    • International travelAustraliaPacific IslandsEuropeUKUSAAfricaAsia
    • Rail holidays
    • Cruise holidays
    • Ski holidays
    • Luxury travel
    • Adventure travel
  • Kāhu Māori news
  • Environment
    • All Environment
    • Our Green Future
  • Talanoa Pacific news
  • Property
    • All Property
    • Property Insider
    • Interest rates tracker
    • Residential property listings
    • Commercial property listings
  • Health
  • Technology
    • All Technology
    • AI
    • Social media
  • Rural
    • All Rural
    • Dairy farming
    • Sheep & beef farming
    • Horticulture
    • Animal health
    • Rural business
    • Rural life
    • Rural technology
    • Opinion
    • Audio & podcasts
  • Weather forecasts
    • All Weather forecasts
    • Kaitaia
    • Whangārei
    • Dargaville
    • Auckland
    • Thames
    • Tauranga
    • Hamilton
    • Whakatāne
    • Rotorua
    • Tokoroa
    • Te Kuiti
    • Taumaranui
    • Taupō
    • Gisborne
    • New Plymouth
    • Napier
    • Hastings
    • Dannevirke
    • Whanganui
    • Palmerston North
    • Levin
    • Paraparaumu
    • Masterton
    • Wellington
    • Motueka
    • Nelson
    • Blenheim
    • Westport
    • Reefton
    • Kaikōura
    • Greymouth
    • Hokitika
    • Christchurch
    • Ashburton
    • Timaru
    • Wānaka
    • Oamaru
    • Queenstown
    • Dunedin
    • Gore
    • Invercargill
  • Meet the journalists
  • Promotions & competitions
  • OneRoof property listings
  • Driven car news

Puzzles & Quizzes

  • Puzzles
    • All Puzzles
    • Sudoku
    • Code Cracker
    • Crosswords
    • Cryptic crossword
    • Wordsearch
  • Quizzes
    • All Quizzes
    • Morning quiz
    • Afternoon quiz
    • Sports quiz

Regions

  • Northland
    • All Northland
    • Far North
    • Kaitaia
    • Kerikeri
    • Kaikohe
    • Bay of Islands
    • Whangarei
    • Dargaville
    • Kaipara
    • Mangawhai
  • Auckland
  • Waikato
    • All Waikato
    • Hamilton
    • Coromandel & Hauraki
    • Matamata & Piako
    • Cambridge
    • Te Awamutu
    • Tokoroa & South Waikato
    • Taupō & Tūrangi
  • Bay of Plenty
    • All Bay of Plenty
    • Katikati
    • Tauranga
    • Mount Maunganui
    • Pāpāmoa
    • Te Puke
    • Whakatāne
  • Rotorua
  • Hawke's Bay
    • All Hawke's Bay
    • Napier
    • Hastings
    • Havelock North
    • Central Hawke's Bay
    • Wairoa
  • Taranaki
    • All Taranaki
    • Stratford
    • New Plymouth
    • Hāwera
  • Manawatū - Whanganui
    • All Manawatū - Whanganui
    • Whanganui
    • Palmerston North
    • Manawatū
    • Tararua
    • Horowhenua
  • Wellington
    • All Wellington
    • Kapiti
    • Wairarapa
    • Upper Hutt
    • Lower Hutt
  • Nelson & Tasman
    • All Nelson & Tasman
    • Motueka
    • Nelson
    • Tasman
  • Marlborough
  • West Coast
  • Canterbury
    • All Canterbury
    • Kaikōura
    • Christchurch
    • Ashburton
    • Timaru
  • Otago
    • All Otago
    • Oamaru
    • Dunedin
    • Balclutha
    • Alexandra
    • Queenstown
    • Wanaka
  • Southland
    • All Southland
    • Invercargill
    • Gore
    • Stewart Island
  • Gisborne

Media

  • Video
    • All Video
    • NZ news video
    • Business news video
    • Politics news video
    • Sport video
    • World news video
    • Lifestyle video
    • Entertainment video
    • Travel video
    • Markets with Madison
    • Kea Kids news
  • Podcasts
    • All Podcasts
    • The Front Page
    • On the Tiles
    • Ask me Anything
    • The Little Things
    • Cooking the Books
  • Cartoons
  • Photo galleries
  • Today's Paper - E-editions
  • Photo sales
  • Classifieds

NZME Network

  • Advertise with NZME
  • OneRoof
  • Driven Car Guide
  • BusinessDesk
  • Newstalk ZB
  • What the Actual
  • Sunlive
  • ZM
  • The Hits
  • Coast
  • Radio Hauraki
  • The Alternative Commentary Collective
  • Gold
  • Flava
  • iHeart Radio
  • Hokonui
  • Radio Wanaka
  • iHeartCountry New Zealand
  • Restaurant Hub
  • NZME Events

SubscribeSign In
Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.
Home / Entertainment

Why Netflix Sex/Life with Adam Demos is an outdated story

By Jana Hocking
news.com.au·
8 Jul, 2021 08:24 PM5 mins to read

Subscribe to listen

Access to Herald Premium articles require a Premium subscription. Subscribe now to listen.
Already a subscriber?  Sign in here

Listening to articles is free for open-access content—explore other articles or learn more about text-to-speech.
‌
Save

    Share this article

Adam Demos caused quite a stir after appearing in that shower scene in Sex/Life. Photo / Netflix
Adam Demos caused quite a stir after appearing in that shower scene in Sex/Life. Photo / Netflix

Adam Demos caused quite a stir after appearing in that shower scene in Sex/Life. Photo / Netflix

As one of many singletons in Sydney, I have found myself living alone in lockdown with plenty of time in my hands. So yes, I succumbed and watched the Netflix series that has got everyone going gaga, Sex/Life.

So before I go off on a foot-stomping rant, let's start by addressing the elephant (trunk) in the room. Yes, the lead character, played by Wollongong stud Adam Demos, has a giant pecker.

And yes, I have heard from a "very" good source that it is indeed real. We're talking, someone who has been up-close-and-personal. Side note: Some bloke also slid into my DMs to tell me that he was a mate of Adam's back in his Wollongong days, and apparently Adam was famous for doing the "windmill" at parties.

Demos reportedly shared his blessing with high-school pals. Photo / Netflix
Demos reportedly shared his blessing with high-school pals. Photo / Netflix

OK, now that we've got that ridiculousness out of the way, can I please state one major, glaringly obvious problem I have with Sex/Life.

Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.
Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.

The storyline is not just badly written, it is also shockingly outdated.

Not since the 0s, when I would fake a sickie off school and enjoy a glorious day on the couch watching tragic midday movies, have we seen the female lead play a character who is just so cliche!

Yep, a bored housewife who has given up her career to rear children and look miserably out of the window while her husband heads off to the city to climb the career ladder.

Question for the room, does that really still go on?!

Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.

Read More

  • Lillie Rohan: Netflix's new show Sex/Life made me want to text my ex - NZ Herald
  • Sex/Life is little more than soft porn and it's anything but sexy - NZ Herald
  • Netflix viewers shocked by actor's full-frontal nude scene in Sex/Life - NZ Herald
  • Nadia Bokody: Big myth hurting your sex life - NZ Herald

Why must Billie, the female protagonist, still be portrayed as a lonely horny housewife? There's a heck-load of females with raging sex drives, and you know what? They also have at least a side hustle.

As Tanya Hennessy mentioned in our podcast chat this week, couldn't she at least have an "Etsy business" on the go?

Sarah Shahi as Billie and Adam Demos as Brad in Sex/Life. Photo / Netflix
Sarah Shahi as Billie and Adam Demos as Brad in Sex/Life. Photo / Netflix

Now listen, I am not having a go at stay-at-home mums. Oh lord no! As someone who needs a nap after just looking after friends' children for an hour, I tip my hat to you.

But the basic premise of this show is saying you have to make a choice: either be a loving stay-at-home mother with a so-so sex life or be footloose and fancy-free with raging hormones that you can act on. But you must choose and if you choose the latter, prepare to be judged. Heavily.

Discover more

Entertainment

Review: Netflix's new show made me want to text my ex

06 Jul 07:00 PM
Entertainment

15 TV shows you should binge watch right now

06 Jul 03:37 AM
Agribusiness

Oh deer: The rise and rise of pizzle exports

08 Jul 06:08 PM
Lifestyle

Jana Hocking: One thing you should never say on a first date

24 Jun 07:42 PM

It seems the moral of the story is if she wants to be the character everyone loves and adores, she must choose the first option. Put her family first. No matter how miserable she is. For only the devil himself would choose to uproot their lives in order to make themselves happy.

Now, here's a theory. Why not put yourself first?! No longer attracted to your constantly whining husband who you are not sexually attracted to? Here's an idea, leave.

As a child of divorce, I have seen the pros and cons from both sides. Growing up in a family atmosphere that was horribly unhappy, I was exposed to the constant fighting and deep-seated resentment that came with sacrificing happiness because "keeping the family together" was the right thing to do.

It wasn't until my youngest brother finished high school, that my parents finally said "catch ya later" and parted ways.

What came after that was two people who could finally get on with their lives. The lives they deep down had always wanted to live. My mum hopped on a plane and travelled the world with her true soulmate. My dad moved straight back to the country town he has always wanted to return to, and you know what, they're the happiest they've ever been.

Jana Hocking believes people shouldn't stay in unhappy marriages. Photo / Supplied
Jana Hocking believes people shouldn't stay in unhappy marriages. Photo / Supplied

It left me scratching my head, thinking, why the heck didn't you do that years earlier?! And I know why. It's because societal pressure kept them together. They were so worried about separating the family, and the public shame that came with divorce. So instead, they plodded along in a marriage that left them fairly miserable for a good chunk of their lives.

Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.

It had a lasting effect on myself as well. I never grew up wanting to race down the aisle because my interpretation of marriage was that it was a miserable situation you could find yourself stuck in. No thank you!

So when you stumble upon a storyline in 2021 that's basically saying – if you stay in a marriage, no matter how miserable it makes you, you're a saint. But leave a marriage and perhaps return to a career you love and a man that makes your knees shake, good lord you are the devil!

Nope, it's 2021! Isn't it time we changed the narrative?!

Save

    Share this article

Latest from Entertainment

Entertainment

Pop star Jesy Nelson welcomes twins after health scare

19 May 03:27 AM
Reviews

Who have been the highlights so far from the NZ International Comedy Festival?

19 May 03:00 AM
Entertainment

'Absolute losers': Elton John's fiery critique of UK copyright reforms

18 May 11:50 PM

Sponsored: How much is too much?

sponsored
Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.
Recommended for you
Israel allows 'basic amount' of food into Gaza, then 24 hours later kills more than 20
World

Israel allows 'basic amount' of food into Gaza, then 24 hours later kills more than 20

19 May 08:48 AM
'Feared for her life': Man tried to strangle ex before setting her clothes on fire
Crime

'Feared for her life': Man tried to strangle ex before setting her clothes on fire

19 May 08:00 AM
'Extremely devastating': Mum's tribute, homicide investigation into daughter's death
New Zealand

'Extremely devastating': Mum's tribute, homicide investigation into daughter's death

19 May 07:52 AM
Erin Patterson allegedly visited death cap site before fatal lunch
World

Erin Patterson allegedly visited death cap site before fatal lunch

19 May 07:06 AM
'Smash her': Family evicted after property manager threatened
Property

'Smash her': Family evicted after property manager threatened

19 May 07:00 AM

Latest from Entertainment

Pop star Jesy Nelson welcomes twins after health scare

Pop star Jesy Nelson welcomes twins after health scare

19 May 03:27 AM

The former Little Mix member underwent emergency surgery in a bid to save her children.

Who have been the highlights so far from the NZ International Comedy Festival?

Who have been the highlights so far from the NZ International Comedy Festival?

19 May 03:00 AM
'Absolute losers': Elton John's fiery critique of UK copyright reforms

'Absolute losers': Elton John's fiery critique of UK copyright reforms

18 May 11:50 PM
Kea Kids News: Little boots, big dreams!

Kea Kids News: Little boots, big dreams!

Sponsored: Cosy up to colour all year
sponsored

Sponsored: Cosy up to colour all year

NZ Herald
  • About NZ Herald
  • Meet the journalists
  • Newsletters
  • Classifieds
  • Help & support
  • Contact us
  • House rules
  • Privacy Policy
  • Terms of use
  • Competition terms & conditions
  • Our use of AI
Subscriber Services
  • NZ Herald e-editions
  • Daily puzzles & quizzes
  • Manage your digital subscription
  • Manage your print subscription
  • Subscribe to the NZ Herald newspaper
  • Subscribe to Herald Premium
  • Gift a subscription
  • Subscriber FAQs
  • Subscription terms & conditions
  • Promotions and subscriber benefits
NZME Network
  • The New Zealand Herald
  • The Northland Age
  • The Northern Advocate
  • Waikato Herald
  • Bay of Plenty Times
  • Rotorua Daily Post
  • Hawke's Bay Today
  • Whanganui Chronicle
  • Viva
  • NZ Listener
  • What the Actual
  • Newstalk ZB
  • BusinessDesk
  • OneRoof
  • Driven CarGuide
  • iHeart Radio
  • Restaurant Hub
NZME
  • About NZME
  • NZME careers
  • Advertise with NZME
  • Digital self-service advertising
  • Book your classified ad
  • Photo sales
  • NZME Events
  • © Copyright 2025 NZME Publishing Limited
TOP
search by queryly Advanced Search